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Summary: this is me
Review: I've been glued to this book since I bought it. I'm up here to buy another copy cuz I lost the dog-eared copy I was reading. Everything the other reviewers say is true. He doesn't just talk about it from a safe distance, he lives it.
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Summary: a courageous book
Review: Feminist writers often ignore the price men pay in a patriarchal society, as if having "power" were reward enough for living as an emotionally injured human being. Mr. Real's courageous book points out exactly what that price is and how it affects men, women, and society. This book is an eye-opener for everyone, therapist or otherwise. It gives the Oedipus myth another well-deserved blow. It provides the reader with a powerful perspective on current news events, such as sadistic hazing, so poorly explained by facile remarks concerning "peer pressure". Moreover, this book will allow the reader to examine his own ideas and attitudes about our socially constructed roles. The book is not so technical as to be beyond the average interested reader, the examples are clear, and the message well thought out. Mr. Real has laid down the framework for a genuine men's liberation movement.
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Summary: one psychologist's opinion
Review: This is truly an awesome book. I have been using it with both men and women clients, and they have made many positive comments. Dr. Real does a great job of explaining men's experiences in our culture, and how sexism hurts both men and women. I especially like that he explains how other (ultimately self-destructive) behaviors can be a manifestation of unidentified (atypical)depression. Also, because he contrasts men's and women's experiences, he also has something to say to women who are depressed. And, he points out the importance of connection and nurturing for all children, not just girls. Several clients have reported increased emotional attunement with their children as a result of their reading this book. Personally and professionally, this book has really explained a lot, and is engaging to boot!
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Summary: I cried for my father, my son and for myself
Review: It has been said that a copy of Reviving Ophelia should be given out at the birth of every baby girl. In like,this book should be given to every woman who gives birth to a baby boy. It is written in a simple language and allows one to relate to the experiences of others who have suffered. It brings understanding and hope to a illness that is killing (spiritually and physically) a generation of men. I highly recommend it for men and women in recovery from addiction (alcohol, drugs, sex, gambling...you name it). Come to think about it, maybe the book should be handed to every prisoner who walks into a jail. Hopefully some will find it before then. I know my family is better for us having read the book.
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Summary: Just because it makes you weepy...
Review: I picked up this book at the library for the title. I was interested in depression and if someone was willing to narrow it to being male, all the better. This book does not do it. The author harvests his rolodex. We read anecdote after anecdote about big men with said childhoods. One had been beaten by his father. Another had been orphaned and had to go live with a cruel aunt. After about twenty pages of beatings and abuse, I was pretty weepy. The author's style seems to be getting these men to open up in therapy with the wife and family, spreading around deep personal pain, and getting everybody to start having some good cries. But just because it makes you cry doesn't mean it's good for you. This book focuses mainly on psychotherapy, but there are many contributors for depression. For example, if you're feeling beaten down at work, psychotherapy with the wife and kids will probably make you feel worse. Readers should also be aware this book goes down the same murky route Robert Bly walked in his book "Iron John", talking about wounded heros and other bits of male mythology. I would suggest most male suffering from mild depression don't need a book like this. For practical help with depression, I can recommend "Dealing with Depression Naturally" by Syd Baumel. His list of options is truly exhaustive. You can decide for yourself which route you want to go down.
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Summary: I Don't want to talk about it:
Review: I would recommend this book to any male friend who is in need of life change. I have bought 6 copies so far for other people and am now in the process of ordering another for myself. As men we no longer need to live the legacy that was handed to us by our fathers or grandfathers. Recently divorced I knew I needed to understand what I was going through. I had the pleasure of doing a weekend workshop with Terrrence Real and feel extremely fortunate for having done so.This book is a must!
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Summary: Very useful if you dare to take the journey
Review: Really benefited from this book on Male depression. I'mreally picky about with psych/self help books and this book is very applicable to men, but only men that are really willing to "do the work." This book will not replace your clinical recovery, but it will assist your soulful one. A bit advanced. It's perfect for someone like me (who's already done a bunch of therapy and soul work in my life. Check it out... if you're brave enough.
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Summary: Great Book
Review: This is a great book. I have read alot of books on depression, and this is one of the best.It is written in a laymans style so that people suffering from this disease wont be bogged down with technical terms.
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Summary: For Men and their loved ones
Review: I began seeing a psychiatrist in an attempt to save a marriage, although I felt nothing wrong my wife did. After having visited my counselor, I began to feel all alone in my depression - like I was the only one who felt this way. This book helped me to see not only was I not alone, but what I could do to help myself. I would recommend this to anyone - whether a man or his loved ones to help understand what is going on inside. My marriage did not itself work out, but I did share this book with her and if nothing else she understands what I was feeling...
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Summary: An aid to understand complex human behaviors
Review: Dr. Real's approach to describing depression in men offers a broad perspective that permits coherent examination of what might otherwise appear to be unrelated male behaviors. The patterns he associates with covert depression and which he describes so lucidly will be familiar to many. Men, dare to look carefully at yourselves. Women, thoughtfully consider your partners. Sons, study your fathers, learn, and be alert for the telltale patterns in your own lives. The violence Terrence Real attributes to men who live with unidentified covert depression is not always physical. Emotional "violence" can be more pernicious because our society does not recognize it or address it as effectively as physical violence in the law and through the remedies available from our legal system. How many families have been destroyed emotionally and financially by separation and divorce, and how many children's lives have been forever altered negatively, not by intentional malice or truely irreconcilable differences between spouses, but by unrecognized and untreated depression?
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