Rating: 
Summary: A must read for married couples!!!
Review: I read this book on the advice of my marriage therapist, right after my divorce was final. No advice has ever rung so true. It was a little too late to fix that one, but it's given me a lot to practice for the future. Of course, no book can answer all the questions, solve all your problems, but if you want to understand some of the more intricate patterns of communication that can subtly erode your marriage, I think this book is exceptional. I recently read it again with my partner, and it drew us together, helped us understand the goings on of our communication, where each of us has difficulty, and gave us sensible, reasonable solutions to mend our relationship and make it more positive. The best part of all: neither of us felt horrible for behaving like children; it just helped us understand what the consequences of our actions might be. One little bit of data he uncovered, the impact of positive to negative interactions between couples, was reduced to a rather mathematical forumula: to practice a ratio of five positive to every one negative interaction. Sounds scientific enough, but in practice it's remarkable how much that little habit has done to improve all of my relationships. I think Gottman's work is a significant contribution to understanding how marriages do work, and what couples can do to avoid the pitfalls of harmful communication patterns. I have recommended it to everyone I know whose relationships are ailing and have gotten a lot of grateful thanks from them. He's got a great writing style, humorous at times, and the book is fun to read with your significant other. I feel his information is practical, authentic, and gives the people like me, who don't quite understand all the ins and outs of communication, hope to have a better relationship.
Rating:
Summary: Excellent advice!
Review: I thought that this book was excellent in outlining the types of patterns we fall into when we get married. It gave me a positive but realistic outlook on what is going on in my marriage and how I can work on making it better. The author's de-emphasis on deep meaningful communication left me a little unsatisfied. Although I know that letting go of the little things is important, I feel that opening up to your partner is very important in a loving relationship. I like another book that takes this one step further in developing a deep caring relationship. It is called "The Ever-Transcending Spirit" by Toru Sato and I highly recommend it to anyone looking to understand and improve his or her relationship.
Rating: 
Summary: honest check list for relationship status & how to improve
Review: Reading this book was like a check list for me. My marriage has gotten to the point that my husband's councelor suggested we both read this book, then meet together with him. I found this helpful for me to see exactly where I was in my opinion of our marriage. The occasional "tests" helped me to see myself honestly and admit the mistakes I've been making for the past 22 years. It was difficult to admit that I was in such an unsuccessful relationship, but when I was the one taking the tests and answering the questions, it was obvious that I needed to take some of the advice the author suggests for each "problem". Now I can only hope that my husband will do the same. Atleast for me, I know that I really need to consider a divorce as an alternative to being lonely, depressed and unhappy. Even though it was not easy, I am glad I read this book.
Rating:
Summary: Seems quite sound
Review: So many self-tests but doing them seemed worthwhile. I felt a lot better about my marriage after reading this book and evaluating the tests, as it seems a lot of what I worried about doesn't spell trouble, according to Gottman, and we seemed to be on a right track together. In areas for which the tests indicated improvement would help, it seems that focusing on a few practices goes a long way. Still, learning not to be defensive doesn't come easy. Avoiding "flooding" by calming techniques (breathe, breathe) seems to pay off a lot.
My impression is that Gottman's advice is valuable given how hard marriage can be. I appreciate that he avoids stereotypes and any system of speculations. I expect to return to this book now and then to try to keep on track.
Rating:
Summary: Excellent
Review: Terrific book. All newlyweds should have a copy. Life changing.
Rating:
Summary: First scientific self help book I've ever read.
Review: The author is using real science to analyze relationships moving the wacky field of psychology (almost) into one of true science. I found it enormously refreshing. It's not just a bunch of touchy-feely gibberish like most relationship books.
Rating: 
Summary: Good identification of marital patterns, but little else
Review: The author's ability to communicate his research in the first half of the book may make the book worth a read. He offers a refreshing look into marital styles, as well as problems that can creep into marriages. While this is interesting, the guidance offered for working through these difficulties is weak. The second half of the book, therefore, is not particularly interesting or helpful. My sense was that, at the time of publishing, the author had scientifically identified patterns and interactions in marriages that indicate when they are in trouble, but he had not yet identified methods to help these couples work through these problems. In addition, his identification of some differences between men and women was superficial. He seemed to have little insight into what men are motivated by, think about, or are worried about. Instead, he characterized them as sex-hungry and unable to communicate, with the solution being that women should just accept them that way. Neither the characterization nor the solution was helpful, accurate, or complete.
Rating:
Summary: A must read for counselors and all married people
Review: The value of this book is that it is based on years of scientific research with both happy and unhappy couples. It looks at relationships from a realistic, practical point of view - as couples experience it. It identifies 4 types of behaviour (criticism, defensiveness, contempt and stonewalling)that are fatal in intimate relationships. This information is crucial in diagnosing the nature and intensity of relationship problems and provides an important point of departure for therapeutic intervention.
Rating: 
Summary: Men must learn to be responsible for their behavior.
Review: There are many books on the market which seek to absolve men of the responsibility for mature or kind behavior in relationships. Unfortunately, this one does, too. The author describes physical symptoms which occur in a man when he is in a heated discussion or argument. This is to justify his withdrawing from the discussion without the issue being resolved. So, because he claims he may have a heart attack, a man can live as unkindly or inconsiderately as he wishes. Does he get away with such behavior at work, may I ask? No, because he would be fired, and lose his income and bragging rights. The point is that people who don't consider the feelings of others do so because others let them. In this society, it is the women who are socialized to be the tolerators of emotional abuse. Because when someone won't talk to you, yet doesn't want you to leave and do more and better with your life, that is abuse. The fact is, people - men and women - need to be mature and responsible in long-term relationships. Those who cannot may choose to stay single.
Rating:
Summary: This book cleared up many unanswered questions for me!!
Review: This book has given me the knowledge of how to deal with problems in my future marriage and to prevent things from going bad. Before I read this book I didn't understand why my finance acted the way he did at times, now I do and understand.
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