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Summary: Tension In Your Family From Child's Sleep Patern?
Review: Is it curtain time for your child's sleep patern? We, like most other parents have encountered the nightly wining, crying and batteling that our child stays all night in his/her own bed. Does your child constantly make the 3:00 in the morning trek from his bed to yours? Are you tired of the crying, when trying to take the little one back to his room? Is your child's cointnual presence in your bedroom creating tension between you and your spouse? We answered yes to all of these questions and decided there had to be a way to manage this situation. Before going to a child sleep specialist, we decided to buy this book. The author explains in a very professional and understandable text, the so called "normal sleep cycles" and how to determine if it is something that can be corrected by the parents should be done by a specialist. Dr. Md. Richard Ferber uses many examples of problems he has incurred with baby's, infants and teens during his career which help the parent better understand the causes of sleep disturbances. I would adivse any person purchasing this book to read it in its entirety before making any judgement about it. Our child was causing a lot friction in the family and we as parents kept giving in to him, unwittingly encouraging his behavior. A child can be scared but it is how the parents behave in explaining these things which causes fear in infants. Although the method of sending the child back to bed each time became a little bit tiresome, not to speak of the parent guilt syndrome for doing so, our son has finally slept all night in his own bed for two weeks after two weeks of following one of his solutions to the problem. You have to be very vigilant and not give in to child's wishes if you wish to succeed in this particular program. It might sound a bit hard on the child but in fact you are helping your child gain self-esteem and confidence. The tensions in our family has subisded and slowly returning to what used to be called "normal". I am sure reading this text will bring clarity to the causes and cures of sleep disturbances in children for any parent.
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Summary: Great book for when you've reached the end of your rope!!
Review: After months of our 9 month old daughter developing poor sleep habits, our pediatrician recommended this book! It was the most difficult process to go thru, but the results were wonderful! After reading this book, you'll understand more about your childs sleep patterns and yours! And then you'll have a plan to help "Solve Your Childs Sleep Problems"!
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Summary: Give this approach a chance, IT IS WORTH IT!
Review: We are only on the 3rd day of trying the techniques in this book and already our 4 1/2 month old daughter is sleeping MUCH better, longer and in her crib! We had her in our bed with us from day one and although we liked the IDEA of it, the REALITY was not so great: she, my husband and I are light sleepers and any little movement would wake her up so I would have to soothe her back to sleep with a feeding, rocking or a pacifier which meant we were all up many times a night. It was fine when she was a newborn and needed to wake up to eat, but as she got older it was just a habit and side effect of having her in bed with us. We modified the Ferber approach to our comfort level (checking on her & reassuring her 2-3 minutes then 6 etc. instead of the 5, 10, 15 min. the book says to do) and she is already starting to soothe herself ALONE IN HER CRIB both at night and with naps plus she is sleeping longer and is much more happy during the day! We thought we just had a fussy, grumpy baby but now we realize she was sleep deprived! The first night she cried off and on for 26 minutes with us soothing her in increments. Then woke up 3 times with each waking taking considerably less time for her to fall back asleep. The second night (last night) it only took 6 minutes from the beginning for her to fall asleep on her own(!) and she stayed asleep for 6 straight hours, which was a record for us! Her naps have gone from a fitful 30-45 min. to 2 hours! I have also read the Dr. Sears Baby Book and agree with most of it, but having tried the Family Bed/Co-Sleeping, it just did not work for us, if it works for others, that is great but if you are like us and want your child to ultimately sleep in their own crib and be able to soothe themselves then at least try this book! I have read the reviews criticizing this approach as cruel and "trying to fit a newborn into your schedule" but that is not what the approach does: it allows you as the parent to do what is best for your baby, and a good solid sleep is very good for them, AND it allowed us as parents to reconnect and sleep better also! Happy, rested parents and a MUCH happier, MUCH more rested baby are all the proof we need.
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Summary: Wait a Minute!
Review: Look, this book is not about parenting. It's about fitting a precious newborn baby into your schedule. It's about ignoring your baby's needs. Consider WHY your child is waking at night. Is he hungry, wet, or just need his mama? Please, if you read this book, also check out other methods before trying this one (Dr Sears' The Baby Book, Nighttime Parenting, and other books on Attachment Parenting). It's only fair to do the research for BOTH sides. Doesn't your baby deserve the best? Good Luck and Read Much!
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Summary: An insensitive and cruel method
Review: Ferber's book devalues the most important tool a mother has to bond with her baby. That is responding to a baby's crying. When a baby cries - something is wrong. That might mean simply that a baby needs to be held and loved longer. Ferber's method tells baby that nightime is scary, dark, and that love and affection is gone until morning. Ferber goes against common sense. His method may work but it is cruel and insensitive. Your baby stops crying because he is emotionally and physically exhausted. That's sad. A better alternative is Dr.Sears, "The baby book". It is wonderful.
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Summary: Confessions of a recovering "Attachment Parent "
Review: Thank you, Dr. Ferber! You have saved the sanity of all who dwell under our roof! My ten month old son spent four months waking me up at least three times to nurse, from age 6 months to the present. At his worst, he would wake me up EVERY 15 MINUTES, and tossed and turned all night long in bed with me, while my husband slept in another bedroom. We were all totally sleep deprived, and the baby was as miserable as I was! I had been buying into Dr. Sears' theories of parenting which advised to bring baby into bed with me, and it just got worse and worse until I literally considered checking into a mental hospital just to get some sleep!!! My husband and I were reluctant to let baby cry, and dreaded trying it, but the first night, after crying for an hour, he slept straight through for 9 hours until morning! He has slept an average of 11 hours at night ever since, and he now takes two 1-hour long naps every day!!! He never used to nap!!! He usually goes down without even crying now, just rolls over, smiles, and snoozes away. WHAT A DIFFERENCE! It is hard at first, but babies need to be given boundaries around their sleep. Most cannot naturally organize their own sleep patterns. I know mine sure needed some limits set around his sleep. Now that I have made it clear to him that nighttime is for sleeping, he knows, and he is a MUCH happier baby because of it! Sears warned that I would have a very unhappy baby if I let him cry, and instead, he is a well-rested and much happier baby! Sears warned that I would sacrifice our strong attachment for sleep, but this is exactly the opposite of what has happened! My baby is so much more joyful and loving now that he is not sleep deprived! We recommend this book unabashedly!!!
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Summary: Excellent Book
Review: I borrowed this book from a friend and used the "techniques" in the book and was so pleased that I bought several copies for friends. Everyone that used it was amazed how quickly their children started sleeping on their own. The trick (and downside, if there is one) is that you have to do what the book says. If you fudge even a little bit you have undermined what you are trying to do. The good thing is that it really does only take 3 nights to get results. Most of my friends read the book and said, "There is no way this will work with MY child" but they were so desperate that they tried it and were thrilled that they did. They really couldn't believe that it was so simple.
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Summary: It works and we're all Happier for it
Review: When we taught our baby how to sleep, I read and reread every single review of this book so I know how you feel! Are you doing the right thing? Are you a bad parent? You are doing the right thing and that makes you a good parent. Here is our story. In order to fall asleep, Alex needed to be swaddled and to have his pacifier. Whenever his blankets were loose or the pacifier fell out, he would awaken and not be able to get back to sleep without my help to rewrap the blankets and put in his pacifier. By three months, he was waking 3 times a night (in addition to needing to eat). Dr. Ferber recommends sleep training kids who are at least 5 months old, but we decided to try anyway. He outlines exactly what to do in this book and what to expect. The first night was horrible- cry for an hour, sleep for an hour. The second night was incredible- after 45 minutes of crying, Alex slept for 12 hours straight. His body needed continous sleep and, as parents, it was our job to help him get it. It has been a month now and he sleeps 11 to 12 hours each night and goes down without crying. Sometimes we hear a few peeps in the middle of the night, but nothing longer than five minutes. For us, day sleep was harder to acheive, probably because of his young age, though he takes three good naps now and has since he was 3 3/4 months. We combined the information from Dr. Ferber with Dr. Weissbluth's book, Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child. It helps to have solid research backing up your decision to sleep train your child. Alex is a much happier person now as a result of his improved sleep. I am confident that the sleep training was the right thing to do.
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Summary: Amazing!!!!!!!
Review: My daughters doctor gave me this to read. I am so thankful I have a doctor that cares enough to give me this book. In less than a week my daughter was sleeping from 7:30 to 5:30. She almost never cries when I put her in her crib and if she does it is only for a moment and then off to dream land. What a relief. My husband and I can enjoy each others company once again. Thank you.
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Summary: This book saved my sanity and my marriage
Review: For seven months, I was an "attachment" parent; baby was in bed with me BUT we were both light sleepers so we were getting up about every hour or so. As it took 15-30 minutes to nurse him back to sleep, and longer than that to fall asleep myself, only to be awakened by baby again shortly afterward, I was not getting much sleep at all--and worse than that, the sleep deprivation was really affecting my ability to be a good parent and spouse. In desperation I read the relevant chapters in Dr. Ferber's book. I have to admit that we tailored his methods to our comfort level, so the whole process took longer--but he gives you the information that allows you to do this. We gradually removed the "negative" sleep associations (rocking for 25 minutes, etc.) and the things that were contributing to his awaking (breastfeeding at night), kept some of the stuff that didn't seem to matter (pacifier), and added a "transitional object" (stuffed animal and blankie). Now, after a story and a song and some cuddling, baby toddles up to the crib all by himself with his animal and blankie and asks to be lifted in. He then rolls over and falls asleep immediately, and stays asleep for more than 10 hours. Thank you, Dr. Ferber!!! Later, we did gradually remove the pacifier at about 1 year of age. Because of how very seriously screwed up baby's sleep associations were to start with, our unwillingness to cold turkey him, and all the traveling we did, while Dr. Ferber's (modified) methods dramatically improved baby's sleep pretty much after the first week, it actually took several months to get him to the blessed state of sleeping through the night, though happily we finally got there. I still don't know if it might have been better to have applied the method more strictly, but at the time I couldn't take the crying, so we did things more gradually. Based on the information in the book, we figured that so long as the bad sleep associations weren't reinforced and the good ones were, the modified method should still work--and it did, eventually. Dr. Ferber gave me the tools with which to figure out a strategy that would work for our family, and for that I am eternally grateful. I do know that with the next kid, I will plan on putting the baby down in baby's own sleeping space when baby is sleepy but awake, so baby will learn good sleep associations from the beginning and hopefully the next time it won't be so hard. Best wishes for a good night's sleep to everyone.
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