The Best Little Boy in the World

Rating:
Summary: Still Growing...
Review: I really enjoyed this book when it came out (no pun....).If you're looking for the gay mans Bible, this is not it. It does not necessarily have the dignity of Paul Monette, nor the "perfect love" of "The Front Runner." It is simply one mans quite amusing take on his growing awareness of being gay. I see alot of people are ready to stone Andrew Tobias for what they perceive as his hypocrisy. On the contrary, he was honest enough to admit his, at times, somewhat shallow and cavalier attitude. It's always easier to say what everyone wants to hear, he simply told it as it was. I find I don't have to agree with EVERY thought or viewpoint a person has in order to maybe learn something, or, at the very least, be entertained by them. While Andrew Tobias may have personality flaws (who doesn't ?), I hardly see him as the self-hating, superficial, elitist snob that some are trying to paint him as. He is simply a HUMAN BEING, just like a real person!! There's rainbow flag waving politically active gays, and ones who lead a quieter but no less meaningful life. That is their right to make that choice about what they're comfortable with. I know one thing, I have found gay people, no matter where they lie on that scale, to band together and be supportive of each other when need be. Yes, in the gay world, as in the "normal" world (whatever that is), there is a segment who are very image conscious. So what? Hey, sometimes life ain't fair. If you're going to hate everyone who had a more priviledged upbringing than you, and is "prettier", than the majority of us would be miserable ALL the time. On a scale of one to ten, I'm probably a five, maybe a six on a REALLY good day. The chances of a Ten wanting to go out with me are probably non-existant, IF I was ever to give it a thought, which I don't. I mean, really, who cares? And if memory serves, I remember him describing himself in this book as "cute" at best, with varying good days and bad days. Sorry if I'm getting away from the subject of the book, but I found all the personal attacks on this book unwarranted. You'd think Andrew Tobias was Charles Manson. He's not. He's just a funny and very smart guy, and this book is just ONE mans perspective about the almost always difficult process of coming to terms with being gay, which, at the time he did it, was even more difficult and unacceptable. If you know who you are and what you're about, this one mans funny and touching story should not offend. I will say, in the sequal to this book, "The Best Little Boy In The World Grows Up", which, by the way, he had written without using the pseudonym "John Reid", as in the first book, he had made progress in his awareness of self, and in the quality of his personal life. I mean, he's cute AND gives good financial advice... what's so bad about THAT ??

Rating:
Summary: one of the greatest
Review: I would not want to be without this book, so great and meaningful was it in my personal journey.

Rating:
Summary: good
Review: I'm heterosexual, but read this just because I'm such a fan of Andrew Tobias' financial writing. It's razor sharp with wit. This was an interesting look into the gay psyche.... When Tobias said he was worried if a girl he dated would want to do something sexually with him, I thought, "God, wouldn't that be great?!! To not have that demon desire for women, and be free of their teasing and manipulation?!" .... They have so much power over me, it can be frustrating. How great it would be to be free of that.

Rating:
Summary: Damaging story from a damaged, poor writer.
Review: If you're looking for a tale of self-loathing, arrogance born of privilege and internalized homophobia - then you've found your book.

I was hoping this book would be a comment on homosexuality in the '50s and '60s but it isn't - it's the over-indulgent self-obsessed story of a gay man who is so hung up on how smart, privileged, "straight-acting" and attractive he is, that mid-way through the book you realize there can be no redemption.

Worse than this laborious and uneventful story, is the author's socio-political commentary on homosexuality and race (Tobias is a self-admitted racist). It's nothing you haven't heard or read - though the surprise is it's coming from a gay man. It's the sort of bland rhetoric you'd expect from a Bush supporter.

Women rank low on Tobias' list as well. The misogynism here is rampant - how ugly, ineffective and useless they are. As do effeminate gay men. The numerous references to faggots are not only offensive, they show the author to be who he really is - a Hitler among homos - someone who considers himself superior and vastly stronger in his own race.

Regardless of the acclaim given to this book for its "honesty" (how honest can a book written under an alias be?), it doesn't mean it's good reading - or that the author is a likeable character. Remember, Hitler wrote his own memoirs, too. Additionally, Tobias' writing is rambling, weak and despite hearing references to humor in reviews - I found none - just the sad, self-loathing tale of a man who I don't think, will ever be comfortable in his own skin, until he loses his judgment and superiority over other gay men. This is the story of an over-achiever who has always strived for perfection, though has never hit on what it is to be a decent human being.

A damaging book from damaged goods.

Rating:
Summary: good
Review: It is an interesting tale and a common one I am sure. There are portions that resonate with all gay men but the writing itself is at times, cliched and sloppy. None of that would matter, though, if I were not so offended by John Reid's (aka Andrew Tobias') rampant egomania. Even within his constricting closet, he passes judgement on those he deems too gay, not macho enough, not as attractive as he is. It's difficult to sympathize with his struggle. He yearns for freedom and acceptance while blindly condemning the "less blessed" around him. I find it repugnant and after reading about Mr. Tobias' "young stud pool parties" in New York Magazine a few years back, it seems that not much has changed. He's older now but still fit and tan and, oh yeah, very rich. God Bless America. The sequel is called "The Best Little Boy In The World Grows Up". I have not read it but I am doubtful. For me, this book in some way celebrates the elitism that is so overwhelming in the gay community. That is what is truly hurtful and awful about the subculture and what it's teaching young gay men.

Rating:
Summary: Why is this book a "classic"?
Review: It is an interesting tale and a common one I am sure. There are portions that resonate with all gay men but the writing itself is at times, cliched and sloppy. None of that would matter, though, if I were not so offended by John Reid's (aka Andrew Tobias') rampant egomania. Even within his constricting closet, he passes judgement on those he deems too gay, not macho enough, not as attractive as he is. It's difficult to sympathize with his struggle. He yearns for freedom and acceptance while blindly condemning the "less blessed" around him. I find it repugnant and after reading about Mr. Tobias' "young stud pool parties" in New York Magazine a few years back, it seems that not much has changed. He's older now but still fit and tan and, oh yeah, very rich. God Bless America. The sequel is called "The Best Little Boy In The World Grows Up". I have not read it but I am doubtful. For me, this book in some way celebrates the elitism that is so overwhelming in the gay community. That is what is truly hurtful and awful about the subculture and what it's teaching young gay men.

Rating:
Summary: Worked in the 70's ... but now??
Review: My 2nd reading, after nearly eighteen years. I'm not sure how this can be called a novel, as it is so obviously the autobiography of Mr. Tobias, under the pen name of John Reid. It is insightful concerning the thought patterns of small children who grow up knowing they are somehow different, but I found his intolerance for gay people in general, when that is what he is aspiring to, to be irritating and downright obnoxious. He is dreadfully afraid of being associated with anyone who doesn't fit his idea of the perfect gay man: collegiate, handsome, white.

Rating:
Summary: Self-justifying and essentially dishonest
Review: The Best Little Boy In The World stands as proof that not every personal experience should be shared with the rest of the world. Written shortly after the author came out during the mid and late 1970's, this short volume purportedly chronicles John Reid's acceptance of his sexuality and his initial efforts to find a place for himself in the gay world. At the conclusion of the book, I could not help but be struck by how little progress he had actually made in either regard. What is abundantly apparent, however, is Mr. Reid's need for self-aggrandizement at the expense of his fellow gay and lesbians and to separate himself from those same persons. Throughout his book Mr. Reid openly distains gays who are either "too nelly" or "too butch." Perhaps Mr. Reid fears that these characteristics might appear in his own behavior and thereby threaten the security of his career as an up-and-coming executive with IBM. By any account I could not help but believe that Mr. Reid would not hesitate to deny the truth of his sexuality should that fact ever pose a threat to his material and professional success. Further evidence of the author's failure to come to grips with his sexual orientation is to be found in his occasional theorizing as to the origins of homosexuality in some men. For instance, he posits that proportionally the gay population is not as physically attractive as the heterosexual population and that gay men therefore became gay out of their awareness of and sense of inferiority resulting from their inadequacies in this regard. Elsewhere Mr. Reid treats the reader to a similar musing that a person's being assigned an odd name such as Oscar in combination with his being small in stature contributed to that person's becoming gay. Of course, Mr. Reid would never include himself in that unfortunate circle. He makes sure to regularly make the reader aware of his both above average physical beauty and the fact that he has nothing in common with the stereotypical limp-wristed f**! got whom he deems worthy of pity but will never associate with. Mr. Reid offers no explanation for his homosexuality which he at times refers to as his martyrdom leading me to conclude that he has not accepted himself, but rather views his sexual orientation as a curse which he at first denies and then endures. He accomplishes the latter by jumping from sexual conquest to sexual conquest, accumulating and then dispensing of his partners as the mood strikes him without regard to the effects of his actions upon the others involved. However, after doing so, Mr. Reid immaturely refuses to be responsible for his actions and whines about his fears that those whom he has used will no longer want to be his "best friend." While I am aware that such behavior and attitudes are a fact of life in both the gay and straight worlds, there is little if any need to share them with the general reading public. I came out at roughly the same time as Mr. Reid and my experiences were far different. Becoming a a part of the larger gay and lesbian community has proved for me to be a source of infinite joy, friendship and acceptance. It is indeed unfortunate that other persons, especially younger gay men, will read Mr. Reid's book and believe it to be an accurate account of the coming out process to be followed as a model for their own lives. Hopefully, those person's will not be taken in by Mr. Reid's misinformed views and find alternate role models. I also note that Mr. Reid is soon to publish a second volume of memoirs entiled The Best Little Boy In The World Grows. Despite the clear shortcomings of his initial effort, I have already ordered that volume in the hope that during the twenty years following the publication of The Best Little Boy In the World, Mr. Reid has perhaps used the time to seriously reflect upon his life and come to terms with his sexuality.

Rating:
Summary: Insightful book
Review: This book is wonderful! I read it in three days. The author is so insightful, especially since he wrote this at the age of 26. The book holds true to today and truly is a modern classic. A must read!

Rating:
Summary: The most self centered little boy in the world
Review: This is less a chronicle of growing up gay than it is a chronicle of growing up a narcissist. There's really very little empathy here for the experience of others who've grown up gay and little reason to care about the author's experience.