Terry: My Daughter's Life-And-Death Struggle With Alcoholism

Rating:
Summary: George McGovern is a Courageous Man
Review: First of all, my hat off to George McGovern for making this sad, personal tragedy public. Most families who had a son or daughter who spiriled as far out of control as Terry did would try to bury@the memory deep in guilt or shame. McGovern chooses to show us by example that, no matter how much money or expertise you throw at finding a solution to a "killer problem,"@in some cases an answer always remains elusive, a mystery. The man tried nearly everything humanly possible to help save his child - nothing worked, all the highest paid experts failed. This story is every parent's nightmare. If I were an educator of high authority, I would make this book mandatory reading for every high school student in the United States to clearly show what kind of drug they are messing with in alcohol - it's not a pretty picture.

Rating:
Summary: A harrowing and heartrending tale of alcoholism.
Review: Former South Dakota senator, and one time Presidential hopeful, George McGovern relates the sad story of his daughter Terry, who's alcoholism finally killed her when she passed out in a snowfilled alley outside of a bar one cold December night. With an objective honest and insight into both his daughter and the nature of addiction, McGovern tells how him middle daughter grew up and became mired in an inescapable quicksand of addiction. Having recently lost my wife to the ravages of this disease (ironically this book was one of hers and one she quite enjoyed reading) I can relate to McGovern's feelings of anger, frustration, and helpless regret over how the disease warped both his daughter's spirit and mind. This book is an essential for anyone who has ever had to battle, or has a loved who battles, this wretched, life eating disease. Highest recommendation.

Rating:
Summary: Disturbing Lessons
Review: George McGovern honors the memory of his daughter, and struggles to understand his own choices and mistakes in this powerfully moving and tragic story. Deep thanks and deep condolences are due McGovern for writing this book. He raises an issue that must be emphasized: his daughter fell victim to the self-pity and the delusions of the "wounded child" craze of the early '90s. She was aided and abetted by reckless "therapists" who encouraged her to blame all her problems on her family, her upbringing, and especially her parents. The greatest tragedy of Terry McGovern's life was not that she was an alcoholic, but that she was an alcoholic who refused to use the tools available to her to get better. Exactly why she made that choice can never be fully known. But clearly the healthiest, most productive, and most sane years of her life were the 8-years she was treating her alcoholism in AA (which is not the "secret society" absurdly referred to by an earlier reviewer; an organization open to all of the public and listed in the telephone book is not a secret society). AA teaches the need to take responsibility for one's actions, not blame Mommy and Daddy. Terry chose not to take responsibility, and instead descended into the quicksand of psychobabble and infantilization of the "inner-child," recovered memory, Blame-Everything-On-Your-Parents school of late 20th century American psychology. The destructiveness of this philsophy and its practitioners needs to be more fully revealed. Everyone interested in this problem as well as in alcoholism should read this book.

Rating:
Summary: Disturbing Lessons
Review: George McGovern honors the memory of his daughter, and struggles to understand his own choices and mistakes in this powerfully moving and tragic story. Deep thanks and deep condolences are due McGovern for writing this book. He raises an issue that must be emphasized: his daughter fell victim to the self-pity and the delusions of the "wounded child" craze of the early '90s. She was aided and abetted by reckless "therapists" who encouraged her to blame all her problems on her family, her upbringing, and especially her parents. The greatest tragedy of Terry McGovern's life was not that she was an alcoholic, but that she was an alcoholic who refused to use the tools available to her to get better. Exactly why she made that choice can never be fully known. But clearly the healthiest, most productive, and most sane years of her life were the 8-years she was treating her alcoholism in AA (which is not the "secret society" absurdly referred to by an earlier reviewer; an organization open to all of the public and listed in the telephone book is not a secret society). AA teaches the need to take responsibility for one's actions, not blame Mommy and Daddy. Terry chose not to take responsibility, and instead descended into the quicksand of psychobabble and infantilization of the "inner-child," recovered memory, Blame-Everything-On-Your-Parents school of late 20th century American psychology. The destructiveness of this philsophy and its practitioners needs to be more fully revealed. Everyone interested in this problem as well as in alcoholism should read this book.

Rating:
Summary: An EXCELLENT read!
Review: I found 'Terry' an interesting, disturbing, educational read. My ex-husband is an alcoholic, and parts of this book were like reading about him - most reassuring to know I was not the only one to experience such traumas. I think this book is well worth reading for anyone with alcoholism in their family.

Rating:
Summary: very unselfish account of a personal tragedy
Review: I heard George McGovern talking about this book on NPR when it first came out, but it wasn't till recently that i had a chance to read it. I thoroughly enjoyed it, because it gave me some insight on addiction that i did not have before. Sen. McGovern's intentions in writing this book are laudable, and i have a lot of respect for him. I can only imagine how painful it must have been to research the material (Terry's journals, social workers' reports, etc), and to actually write the book and go through those memories. He is sincere and acknowledges his responsibility as a father, and does not try to place blame on alcohol, society, or many of the other targets of anti-abuse groups. Terry might as well have been born with CF, because she suffered from (in her case) an incurable disease. If you want to understand the incredible power of addiction, this book is a great place to start.

Rating:
Summary: very unselfish account of a personal tragedy
Review: I heard George McGovern talking about this book on NPR when it first came out, but it wasn't till recently that i had a chance to read it. I thoroughly enjoyed it, because it gave me some insight on addiction that i did not have before. Sen. McGovern's intentions in writing this book are laudable, and i have a lot of respect for him. I can only imagine how painful it must have been to research the material (Terry's journals, social workers' reports, etc), and to actually write the book and go through those memories. He is sincere and acknowledges his responsibility as a father, and does not try to place blame on alcohol, society, or many of the other targets of anti-abuse groups. Terry might as well have been born with CF, because she suffered from (in her case) an incurable disease. If you want to understand the incredible power of addiction, this book is a great place to start.

Rating:
Summary: Shockingly familiar grounds
Review: I read this book when it first came out. At the time I was suffering from depression and alcoholism. I wept as I read the pages because I knew that I too could end up like Terry. I felt for Terry and her family all through out the book. I also realized how my family must have felt and how they might feel if I too fell victim to myself and alcohol. You have to give credit to the courageouls George McGovern to share his families sacred secrets and tradgedy. This is a must have book for anyone who is an alcoholic, heavy drinker or depressed or anyone who knows or lives with an alcoholic or heavy drinker.

Rating:
Summary: Painful
Review: It is really emotionally hard to read George McGovern's anguished account. This guy must have still been in deep torment when he penned it. Page after page you see him struggle for answers...he must spend many a day reviewing his own actions to see if there was anything hee could have done different. Lots of parents write books about their deceased children, but this one is just so honest that I could not put it down...literally. I picked it up after dinner and finished it at 4:30 the next morning.

Rating:
Summary: How I remember Teresa
Review: My name is Sölvína and I am a recovering alcoholic. In the 90's I was linving in Minnesota, I sometimes went to AA meetings in Madison Wi. there I meet teresa. We did not get to know one another very well then. But we were aquinted. I admired her sweet disposition and calmness but also hers humor and boldness. In 1992 we meest again, at Hazelden MN. At that time she was terribly sick, she had changed totally. We had four or five days togeather at that time. Then she told me what had happened to her since we last saw each other in 1986. After that she wrote to me several times, but I had a hard time gettiing any messega to her, since she never stayed very long in the same place. I was very moved when I read this book. Her father tells her story so truthfully and honestly. I have never read any other book about an alcoholic that is so true. When I and teresa stayed togeather at Hazelden she recited a poem to me, which I wrote up. I never knew if she had written it or someone else.
Slowly she celebrated the scrament of letting go
First she surrended her green
then the orange, yellow and red
finally she let go of her brown
shedding her last leaf
she stood empty and silent stripped bare
she began her vigil of trust
shedding her last leaf
she watched its journey to the ground
she stood in silence
Wearing the color of emptyness
her branches wondering
How do you give shade with so much gone? and then
the scarament of waiting began
the sunrise and sunset watched with tenderness
clothing her sihouettes
they kept her hope alive
they helped her ubderstand that her vulnerability
her dependence and need, her emptiness
her readiness to recieve
were giving her a new kind of beauty
Every morning and every evening they stood in silence
and celebrated togeather
the sarcament of waiting.
today I feel that this poem is about Teresa's life and death.>BR> Teresa was a wonderful person, but she did not know it.