Rating: 
Summary: PLEASE, PLEASE BUY THIS BOOK!
Review: ...I feel I owe large debtof thanks to Another Country.It's been years since I've taken a highlighter pen to a book (college!), but this one has already taught me many ways to rethink my relationship with my parents as they age. The case studies and explanations reflect a lot of what I've been feeling. I believe I can refer back to them often for help and guidance. Mary Pipher's done for caregivers what she accomplished for adolescent girls in "Reviving Ophelia," and has my utmost respect as a writer and as a person. I guess I'm writing this as the voice of at least one more person who is definitely dealing with intergenerational problems. Elder care is as much of a family issue as child care-if not more so, since everyone has parents and not everyone chooses to have children. It's nice to know we're not alone.
Rating:
Summary: Excellent for anyone who knows an elderly person!
Review: Again, Mary Pipher excels in captivating her reader, not only with her knowledge but with interesting case histories. She looks at the elderly from many viewpoints. Sociologically, historically, and as wonderful human beings struggling to understand the next generation. I particuliarly enjoyed the passages about how my generation (raised in the 50's and 60's) spends so much time discussing feelings while the older generation spent time learning skills which promotes self-esteem. She discusses the importance of community and how to respond to our parents with dignity. Well worth reading.
Rating: 
Summary: Little to offer
Review: Another Country offers little more than a compendium of trite platitudes about the differences between generations, interspersed with interviews and quotes about growing old (these being the best part of the book, in my view). Pipher offers sweeping generalizations such as "In the past, humility was valued and praise was delivered sparingly if at all. Thus, people were modest and low-key, but they also had low self-esteem.." with no evidence or support (if indeed, it would be possible to provide any for such a statement). Overall, the book provides the level of insight and analysis you might expect from a magazine article.
Rating:
Summary: A great guide for children facing "role reversal"
Review: Another Country was recommened to me during a difficult time with my mother. Not having faced the dilemma of how to take charge of her life while she was in a deep depression, I was clueless at how to handle it. The wisest words in the book for me, were to remember no matter how old or sick our parents may be, they need to have "a little control" of their life if possible, and to offer them validation of their thoughts and feelings. It's as difficult for them to let us "take the lead" as it is for us as their kids to take it. Another Country offered me the guidance and hope to continue doing the best that I could, and to remember not to take the bad days personally!
Rating:
Summary: Home on the Range
Review: For those of us who know for certain our own mortality and others who have glanced it through elders in their midst Mary Pipher provides a sort of ultimate gift. She writes of our 20th century human family holding practical love-lights upon relevant emotional and stratgic generational layers, their consequences..and unmet needs. With increasing full views by story and example she exposes our hidden links and our needs and benefits as we become more whole with our children, our elders and ourselves amidst the process that carries us toward our own certain passings. Her writing for me reads like song and ministry. Psychology without psychobabble. This book will cheer many, many hearts and give a good lesson while so doing. Thanks Mary, thanks alot..
Rating: 
Summary: This book aids in better understanding between generations
Review: I am a retiree who appreciated the style and content of this helpful book. I agree with the author that we who grew up in the Depression were influenced by having to be frugal, living with cast-offs, making our own way in life. Those of us who were in the services in WWII learned how to be separated from family and loved ones and to survive. After we became parents we found that family structure and expectations changed drastically. Major adjustments came with affluence, new roles for the sexes, and new technology. "Another World" is a guide book for both older and younger people. I bought the book to give to my adult children.
Rating:
Summary: Don't Wait Until Later....Read it Now!
Review: I cried, I laughed and I sighed at the grim truths and revelations in Mary Pipher's book on aging and the place held in our society by our elderly citizens. I folded so many page corners over for review that the book looks like a favorite old cook book. I wish I had read this book before my parents entered old-old age. I was not raised with any grandparents nearby, so had no examples for what to expect and how to deal with and care for aging parents. Growing old with dignity and dealing with declining health and eventually death is the hardest passage of our lives. None of the other passages as individuals, parents or spouses can compare to these challenges. Adolescence, puberty, child-birth, child-rearing, divorce...all seem like a walk through the park in comparison. Having said that, we all need to read the book before our parents reach the old-old phase (although who knows exactly when that might happen). If you're in your 40's or 50's, chances are you should be reading this book. Although the book doesn't provide any recipes or procedures for dealing with the issues of the aging, it does provide valuable insights and suggestions into attitudes, fears, and concerns of both the aged and their care-givers. We just assumed that mother would ask for help when she needed it, but her pride, reluctance to communicate and fierce need to be independent would not allow her to admit how needy and frail she had become. We finally discovered how badly she had deteriorated (although she still wouldn't admit it), and are still regretting that we didn't intervene sooner. She's now in a convalescent hospital, sometimes stoically accepting her condition, but sometimes angry, depressed and resentful. I'm sure I'll pick up the book and read it again as we find our way through this passage. And then when I become a young-old and finally an old-old, hopefully I'll be able to remember the valuable life lessons I'm acquiring now.
Rating:
Summary: incredibly insightful and a pleasure to read
Review: I had just returned from a week's trip with my very active 79 year old mother,when I heard Mary Pipher interviewed on NPR Radio. I read the book and was blown away. Older people can be different, they can be a challenge and they can be wonderful. She explained all of that for me and my relationship with my mother has benefited from my learning.
Rating:
Summary: "Must-Reading" for Adult Kids....
Review: I have just purchased 4 copies of Another Country to send to friends and relatives. My copy was purchased at the DesMoines Airport, as I browsed in the bookstore with my mother in law (91) in her wheelchair, returning from a nostalgic trip to Mom's family farm and a reunion with her 93 year old brother. I cried as I read the Introduction (almost poetry!) and thought, "someone understands us!" Beautifully and carefully crafted, Mary Pipher's book does a stunning job of recreating the peaks and valleys of aging, family relationships, and the growth of us all as we age, both as parents and children of aging parents. As I read it my only regret was that she didn't interview my own parents, married 61 years, living in their own home and still mentally alert and vital aging "young-olds". She could have learned from them some valuable lessons, as I have, about aging and dignity, remarkable people who have remained flexible, loving and marvelous role models for my own aging process. The book was a catharsis for me as the child of aging parents but it was also hopeful, positive and offered new ways to think creatively about aging. I highly recommend it to all.
Rating:
Summary: "Must-Reading" for Adult Kids....
Review: I have just purchased 4 copies of Another Country to send to friends and relatives. My copy was purchased at the DesMoines Airport, as I browsed in the bookstore with my mother in law (91) in her wheelchair, returning from a nostalgic trip to Mom's family farm and a reunion with her 93 year old brother. I cried as I read the Introduction (almost poetry!) and thought, "someone understands us!" Beautifully and carefully crafted, Mary Pipher's book does a stunning job of recreating the peaks and valleys of aging, family relationships, and the growth of us all as we age, both as parents and children of aging parents. As I read it my only regret was that she didn't interview my own parents, married 61 years, living in their own home and still mentally alert and vital aging "young-olds". She could have learned from them some valuable lessons, as I have, about aging and dignity, remarkable people who have remained flexible, loving and marvelous role models for my own aging process. The book was a catharsis for me as the child of aging parents but it was also hopeful, positive and offered new ways to think creatively about aging. I highly recommend it to all.
|
