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Summary: Women Who Love Too Much
Review: An entertaining read, this doesn't feel like a self-help book. I felt like a voyeur watching over other women making obvious mistakes over and over again in the first three-fourths of the book... only to find out that I happened to be reacting to and recreating parts of my adolescence as well. This was hard to accept due to the fact that I had read it only as 'research' for my Woman's Studies class.Encourages woman to face the behaviors often detrimental to them. Labels loving to much as a disease that parallels alcoholism and lays out steps much like AA does. I think this book deserves high praise for the seriousness with which it treats this 'woman's' issue. The feminine equivalent to alcoholism is definitely a social problem that is ignored too often due to the acceptability of a woman "standing by her man" and curing his illnesses through the force of her love. A must read for all women and all sociology majors.
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Summary: A gift of pages!!!!
Review: I am a 29 year old gay male.You may think to yourself "How can this book be of any help and use to him?" "Women Who Love Too Much" has been a life-saver for me,having recently come out of an unhealthy relationship. I am unashamed to say that i was the more "unhealthy person" in that relationship but at the same time,the book gave me tremendous insight as to how unhealthy my partner was. My therapist suggested that i read the book,explaining that the dynamics of relationship are much the same,whether they be homosexual or heterosexual.Please don`t ignore what i have said in this review because my lifestyle is alternative. You who are reading this review,may know somebody close to you who is lesbian or gay.Do they "love too much",are they in an unhealthy relationship,are they in desperate need of help?Whatever their situation may be and most likely it is an unpleasant one,"Women Who Love Too Much" is a definite beginning to heal the pain. I will forever be grateful for having read this book and with no doubt,will keep on reading it.The knowledge,understanding and insecurities i have gained about myself is the knowledge that will steer me in the direction of a truthful,happy and healthy relationship. Thank you Robin Norwood,where-ever you may be in this world.
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Summary: No Such Thing
Review: Is a child ever loved too much? The answer to this seems obvious yet the tendency to question it in adults seems peracious if not faulty. The real answer is that there are too many man who don't love enough. Only within this logic can it be said that there are women who love too much. The disparity is caused by other men who deem loving as somehow indignity to male-ness, or women who accept the limits of male love as a necessary evil because of the work environment they, themselves, accept because of the privileges thought to be attached to the jobs upon which they rely - as money, freedom, or as perks and benefits. Males have never had the emotional freedom to be themselves, or to express the love they feel inside - for women or children - without their jobs and the perception of other men to interfere, and steer them toward such things as lack of commitment, selfishness, or dignity and self esteem found only within the job or work environment, a gross insult to most men. Men have every bit the capacity for love, and the sensitivity to enjoy it if they are divorced from the male image they are seduced into believing 95% of the time. We know this because of what happens to males on vacation, or at times when they do let their guard down to enjoy their lives rather than run the monotonous treadmill of the work lives most cling to for survival. Give a man the freedom to enjoy himself, and undoubtedly, he will show women a life of job and harmony. Include a job, and the atmosphere erodes to the pressures of strain that are typical of most. The most interesting and vivacious of women will defy all odds and refuse to be made into the zombies that permit their men to assume the fetal position that work requires, and encourage them to joyously celebrate their lives and their humanity, able to love with abandon but without promiscuity. The fact that men have never been given a chance to experience their lives in that total comfort and harmony is a fault of women, as well as men, in the demands made upon daily lives. To share in the joy of cultivating an environment of male abandon is a privilege most women never forget, and that too few enjoy. Giving in to the establishment is so much easier, and perhaps more logical with respect to maintaining the morality quotient by which women are conditioned to absorb and don as their coats of armor to bring stability to the world, presumably because men are incapable of doing it, or simply because it is more convenient and comfortable for them to escape those responsibilies, added to their others. Only in the males who are apt to refuse the straight jackets of life that cultivate the abandonment of the joy that could be experienced without it, will women find those that truly do credit to their sex, and to the freedoms they inherit in being males. Certainly, it is likely why women gravitate toward those males who appear to have the characteristics of being fully human, being able to fully love, and in having the courage to truly love the women they enjoy without succumbing to the typical male stereotypes that are fed to the public to contain and corrale weaker men to abandon their happiness. It is impossible for either women or men to love too much. It is only fallacy to recognize that there should be limits to defining relationships that are rooted in joy and self respect, for men or for women, and certainly, for children and parents.
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Summary: This book is a must . . .
Review: ... for women who can't understand how & why they keep getting stuck in relationships where they are taken for granted or abused. I was given a copy of this book in 1993 by the bank officer who helped me open my bank account when my marriage was falling apart and this book changed my life! It had such an impact on me that ever since, as soon as I realize that any of my female associates & friends are in these types of destructive relationships, this is the book I buy for them. I've probably bought this book 20 times in the last 7 years . . . I gave up on lending it out, and just buy my friends a copy, because I never get mine back! To Robin Norwood, thank you for putting into words what I needed to hear & opening my eyes 7 years ago. My life has totally changed for the better & I am now in a wonderful relationship. (Ladies, there are good ones out there! Don't settle for less!) There have been bumps along the way, but I will always have my trusty well-worn copy of the book to remind me that *I* can change this pattern forever!
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Summary: This book changed my life.
Review: Do you keep hoping that if you just love him enough he'll change? Are you putting up with unacceptable behavior, just hoping he'll wake up and become that person you know he could be? If so, read this book. Perhaps you have been focusing too much on him. This book helped me understand my part in the sad relationship I was in. It made me aware of decisions I had made that got me to that state - decisions I was barely conscious (or unconscious) of making at the time. WIthout knowing it, I had operated most of my life with an assumption that I didn't deserve a relationship with an emotionally healthy man and that any man who was really healthy would not be interested in me. So I kept getting in relationships with men who had problems - problems I then tried to love them enough to fix. I thought if I just loved him enough, he would reciprocate by loving me enough. But it never worked. This one book taught me as much about myself as a year in therapy. WIth awareness came the possibility for change - and I have changed. This book was an important piece of the puzzle for me and played an important role in my becoming a much healthier, happier person.
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Summary: Eye Opening
Review: This is an eye opening book. The personal stories in this book can apply to many women to one degree or another. Most women I know have fallen into a relationship at one point in time that is similar to the situtations described in this book. It offers insight into why this happens and allows females to look within themselves for the answers. Worth the read.
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Summary: Every woman should read this powerful book!
Review: I had been living in despair after I had broken up with my ex six months ago. Having suffered from serious depression and frustration, i luckily found this book in a local bookshop. I was so shocked as soon as i turned to read the Preface on which the author says "When being in love means being in pain we are loving too much"! Hey! this was exactly what i had been feeling about my love life! Quickly, i spent a week to finish this book and found that WOMEN WHO LOVE TOO MUCH is definitely the most powerful and wonderful book (not merely a self-help book!) i have ever read! Surprisingly insightful, powerfully written with style, i suggest every woman in the world, esp those who love too much like myself, should read it at least once in their life time, so that they can build up themselves and enjoy a healthier relationship with their partners and, most importantly, with themselves!
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Summary: This book changed my life
Review: After breaking up with someone whom I thought was "the one", I read this book on the suggestion of a friend. I immediately recognized in myself the same patterns described in the book: I was always "falling in love" with the men who were distant in some way, where I ended up "loving" the guy more than he loved me, always hoping that he would change. (Yes, HE was always the problem). Through reading this book in conjunction with working with a therapist, I learned how to focus on myself and my own feelings, getting to the core of the past issues which lead me to think so poorly of myself. I learned to love myself and how to wait for a man who would love, respect and appreciate me. I am now happily married to a man whom I love "just the way he is". I suggest this book to anyone who has been in unhealthy relationships and for those who keep waiting for another's indecisive (regarding committment), disrespectful or abusive behavior to change.
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Summary: The best book I ever read
Review: This book has had the MOST impact on my life of any one book I've ever read. Period. A MUST read for ANYONE who is unsatisfied with the relationships in their life.. be it family, lovers, friends. Do you always feel like you get the short end of the stick? Always dissatisfied? Always walked over? This book is a total MUST read. If I had more than two thumbs to put up, or 5 stars, it would get them all.
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Summary: Why women pick the wrong guys.
Review: Basically it's your parents' fault. You came from a dysfunctional family.
That sounds flip, and I hasten to say that this is an excellent book. Many women have found it helpful. I've bought extra copies to give to people, which is the highest compliment an author can hope for.
It's very well written, with vivid case vignettes that read more like the work of an accomplished novelist than medical case histories. (She not merely describes the physical appearance of her clients but the scenery around as she talks to them). It's really a piece of literature rather than of scientific psychology, and perhaps should only fairly be judged on that basis.
Scientifically it falls short. The theoretical basis is psychodynamic, with a bias to transactional analysis. She attempts to show that the tendency of women to become disastrously involved with the wrong type of man is a disease with characteristics similar to alcoholism or drug addiction. It is due to coming from a dysfunctional family, but the definition of a dysfunctional family is so broad that her theories beome untestable. Sometimes she makes specific testable statements (e.g that nearly every woman with an eating disorder is the daughter of an alcoholic) but does not back them up with any statistics or references to published experiments.
Her treatment recommendations sound reasonable and in accordance with common sense but they are not backed up by any objective evidence of their effectivenss.(Zero-tolerance hardline methods for dealing with physical abuse are not mentioned). Perhaps she has published objective evidence elsewhere and of course many would argue that the testimony of the women who have found this book useful is evidence enough.
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