People Who Make Your Life Hell: Managing the People Who Try to Control You

Rating:
Summary: Take responsibility for your choices
Review: Here is a book that recognises that people are not all academically prepared or have time to digest elite published research data. The book also acknowledges that we get too much information and not enough knowledge or wisdom. Readers need a book that respects them as individuals with the potential for self actualisation. This is a book readers can readily relate to. They quickly identify and understand abusive behaviour and then choose how to take action to change the situation. We are aware that there is no such thing as a quick fix. Nevertheless, here in "People who make your life hell" is the necessary jolt to make us recognise that we are owners of our life choices and how to ensure that we stay owners. Step one is to recognise that we have those choices.

Lois Grant has drawn on 25 years of counselling experience to produce a 'street smart' book that speaks to the reader as a person not a client. It reaches out to young and old. We as readers identify the 'problem' the problem person and also ourselves. We are, however, not treated as dummies. Readers can use the book as a quick reference or read all 208 pages in one sitting. The format is that user friendly - recognise the person, their behaviour and the issue, decide what to do about it, and then do something to change things - you have a choice.

Each key 'problem' character is reviewed succinctly to enable the reader to focus on the key characteristics (Queeen of Hearts, Cheshire Cat) and discover the underlying issues that keep the problem situation alive and unresolved. Only an informed person can make the vital choice to break free from a destructive situation.

That is the power of the book - it is not just a self help book -it is a wake up call - we have a choice. By focussing on the behaviours that produce problems, the book enables the reader to also recognise how they themselves contribute to the life of the problem - and then prepares them to modify their own behaviour. There is no blame or revenge - there is the power of choice.

How to resolve conflict without losing your own integrity is the second focus of the book. We do not have to be like 'them' to deal with 'them' - we do not have to fear them or subject ourselves to unwanted behaviour - we do have a choice.

Lois Grant has bravely challenged bullying by recognising that 'Bullies' and 'Manipulators' do make lives hell, and that we do not have to get as mad as hell to do something about it. There is a better way, and there is an ethical choice.

It would be great if the publishers strongly supported Lois' work, and recognised that speaking to readers in their own language is what books should be about - communicate not bamboozle. Give us choices or you will have less.

Congratulations Lois.

Rating:
Summary: Take responsibility for your choices
Review: Here is a book that recognises that people are not all academically prepared or have time to digest elite published research data. The book also acknowledges that we get too much information and not enough knowledge or wisdom. Readers need a book that respects them as individuals with the potential for self actualisation. This is a book readers can readily relate to. They quickly identify and understand abusive behaviour and then choose how to take action to change the situation. We are aware that there is no such thing as a quick fix. Nevertheless, here in "People who make your life hell" is the necessary jolt to make us recognise that we are owners of our life choices and how to ensure that we stay owners. Step one is to recognise that we have those choices.

Lois Grant has drawn on 25 years of counselling experience to produce a 'street smart' book that speaks to the reader as a person not a client. It reaches out to young and old. We as readers identify the 'problem' the problem person and also ourselves. We are, however, not treated as dummies. Readers can use the book as a quick reference or read all 208 pages in one sitting. The format is that user friendly - recognise the person, their behaviour and the issue, decide what to do about it, and then do something to change things - you have a choice.

Each key 'problem' character is reviewed succinctly to enable the reader to focus on the key characteristics (Queeen of Hearts, Cheshire Cat) and discover the underlying issues that keep the problem situation alive and unresolved. Only an informed person can make the vital choice to break free from a destructive situation.

That is the power of the book - it is not just a self help book -it is a wake up call - we have a choice. By focussing on the behaviours that produce problems, the book enables the reader to also recognise how they themselves contribute to the life of the problem - and then prepares them to modify their own behaviour. There is no blame or revenge - there is the power of choice.

How to resolve conflict without losing your own integrity is the second focus of the book. We do not have to be like 'them' to deal with 'them' - we do not have to fear them or subject ourselves to unwanted behaviour - we do have a choice.

Lois Grant has bravely challenged bullying by recognising that 'Bullies' and 'Manipulators' do make lives hell, and that we do not have to get as mad as hell to do something about it. There is a better way, and there is an ethical choice.

It would be great if the publishers strongly supported Lois' work, and recognised that speaking to readers in their own language is what books should be about - communicate not bamboozle. Give us choices or you will have less.

Congratulations Lois.

Rating:
Summary: Bulllied no more
Review: It's a jungle out there! All the different ways in which people who love you - or don't even like you - want to manipulate and control you. Finally, a handbook to help you recognise the different guises bullies come in, and how to manage them constructively rather than trying to defeat them at their own game. This book is as entertaining as it is insightful. Read it all, read parts of it, read it cover to cover, or just dip into it. It's an easy reference book with a more fullsome table of contents than most books, more like a road map to take you straight to the chapter you need. Bullies come in many shapes and sizes and on vaying missions. This book has grouped them into 21 different styles, each carefully named after a nursery rhyme character [to protect the guilty, I guess]. There's the queen of hearts, whose aim is to intimidate you into instant submission through public abuse, belittling and constant reminders of how wrong you are. And then there's Sleeping Beauty - thrilled to see you until someone better comes along. She's only as good as the company she keeps, but it too afraid to let anyone close enough to see how fragile she is. It's one thing to be able to recognise the bullies in your life, but the beauty of this little, easy to read book, is that you are offered a range of strategies to manage them and maintain your dignity and sanity, as well as that of the bully.