Being a Woman: Fulfilling Your Femininity and Finding Love

Rating:
Summary: It's time to learn to be a lady!
Review: Dr. Grant has written a wonderful book to teach woman all the things that women use to know before society told us that everyone had to be equal. Women are equal to men, but should be so in a feminine way, as they are made. It's a great book to understanding men, and how our actions and attitudes effect them. This book gave me a fresh outlook, improved my marriage, and has made me very happy to be a woman!

Rating:
Summary: Femininity at it's ultimate attractiveness.
Review: Dr. Toni Grant has hit the proverbial nail on the proverbial head. Every man should read this book as a primer to learn what it is to be in the presence of a truly feminine women; one that nothing would be too good for, one that he couldn't do enough for, one that he would always put himself second for and gladly lay his life down for. A far cry from todays trouser clad hard sudo-men who have no semblence of softness in them, and their wimpish male counterparts who accept androgyny and its perverted society as a normal way of life. The book is a breath of fresh air to which I say, "VIVE LA DIFFERENCE!!"

Rating:
Summary: This book is not only for woman
Review: Dr. Toni Grant Premiere radio Psychologist is greatly missed by those who listened to her on a daily basis. This book encapsulates some of her most basic thoughts on love and relationships. If you are a modern woman or man and are having trouble getting a commitment to marriage from your special someone, then this book is for you. Dr. Grant, please return to the radio waves or write more books.

Rating:
Summary: What Women Want
Review: I listened to Dr. Toni for a year or so on the radio when she was in syndication in my area. I was amazed at how well this woman understood how a men think...so I bought this book and read it. I thought the book was excellent and I highlighted many words on many pages as a read. Being a man in this day and age is very confusing. Most men don't have a clue how to behave anymore, women have stripped that away from us. Believe it or not we do have roles and because of that fact we were designed different to perform these roles. Someone else's review of this book referred to "Doing" rather than "Being." What has always mystified me about women is that they have this incredible power by just "being" and men have to work so hard "doing" just to be. Women have always ruled the earth and most never realize it. It is the power of "being a women" that inspires men into "doing" to make her happy. Great book! Thanks Dr. Toni.

Rating:
Summary: Happy coupling in an age of angry feminism.
Review: I stumbled across this book at a garage sale, and it intrigued me. Thumbing through it, however, revealed a treasure trove of truth and wonderful insights into what women do/don't know about men and what they want to know. It also defined, brilliantly, what is true of most men today. Dr. Grant expresses, as a woman with brilliant insight, everything a man would like the 'modern' woman to know about femininity and happy coupling. It is a dead art in American culture today. In an era where men are seen as women's nemesis, where competing with or openly despising men is more fashionable than healthy inter-dependence, where many women have, sadly, forgotten the great power and how-to of Being A Woman, this is a timely book of brilliant insight. Ladies, want all the secrets to what we are about? how to find one of us and KEEP one of us? It's right here.

Rating:
Summary: Ever notice something?
Review: It's been my observation that men are valued by what they DO. This is something they can control. If a man is shortchanged in looks or physique he can still make, do, and act and be a man. And even a physically unattractive man can succeed in work and with women.

However, women are valued more by things they can't control -- like looks, shape, etc. Dieting and styles and makeup can help women look better, but still it is still not nearly as much in her control as initiative taking and "doing" is for men. And to me, "BEING" is not as easily controlled as "DOING."

I am not in favor of being a "control freak." But we may need to do a big redefinition of BEING. Folks, BEING results in actions. For me to BE who I am, I must be a writer, musician, teacher and thinker and artist. And that is going to involve writing, teaching, thinking, drawing and painting. Guess what! Those are actions! Oh, dear! Did my estrogen level go down when I started to write this review?

I can't help thinking that this is more of the Mars/Venus stuff rehashed.

To me, the best way for a woman to treat her husband is with plain old fashioned GOOD MANNERS. I try not to "upstage" him because that would be disrespectful and mean. Do you know how I know that? It's because I don't like it when anyone else -- male or female -- tries to upstage me. It's mean. It's impolite. And it's egotistical.

On the other hand, if I can do something that he can't do, and he feels threatened by that, then I say that the relationship is not worth having. If he "has" to have a higher IQ than I do, if he "has" to be the most capable person in the relationship, then it's phony, pure and simple. And it would make me respect men and masculinity less.

Fortunately, I think most rational men would agree.

I would rather attract a man in the middle of doing something I enjoy doing and have him compliment me on THAT as opposed to my "blue eyes" or something else over which I have ixnay zilcho control.

By the way -- I am happily married to a man who thinks that this stereotyping stuff is silly.

Rating:
Summary: Ever notice something?
Review: It's been my observation that men are valued by what they DO. This is something they can control. If a man is shortchanged in looks or physique he can still make, do, and act and be a man. And even a physically unattractive man can succeed in work and with women.

However, women are valued more by things they can't control -- like looks, shape, etc. Dieting and styles and makeup can help women look better, but still it is still not nearly as much in her control as initiative taking and "doing" is for men. And to me, "BEING" is not as easily controlled as "DOING."

I am not in favor of being a "control freak." But we may need to do a big redefinition of BEING. Folks, BEING results in actions. For me to BE who I am, I must be a writer, musician, teacher and thinker and artist. And that is going to involve writing, teaching, thinking, drawing and painting. Guess what! Those are actions! Oh, dear! Did my estrogen level go down when I started to write this review?

I can't help thinking that this is more of the Mars/Venus stuff rehashed.

To me, the best way for a woman to treat her husband is with plain old fashioned GOOD MANNERS. I try not to "upstage" him because that would be disrespectful and mean. Do you know how I know that? It's because I don't like it when anyone else -- male or female -- tries to upstage me. It's mean. It's impolite. And it's egotistical.

On the other hand, if I can do something that he can't do, and he feels threatened by that, then I say that the relationship is not worth having. If he "has" to have a higher IQ than I do, if he "has" to be the most capable person in the relationship, then it's phony, pure and simple. And it would make me respect men and masculinity less.

Fortunately, I think most rational men would agree.

I would rather attract a man in the middle of doing something I enjoy doing and have him compliment me on THAT as opposed to my "blue eyes" or something else over which I have ixnay zilcho control.

By the way -- I am happily married to a man who thinks that this stereotyping stuff is silly.

Rating:
Summary: A great tool for self-discovery & managing your marriage
Review: This book is a great tool for self-discovery & managing your marriage. The jacket describes it as "suggesting a way to live that is balanced between the adaptive attitude of the homemaker of the fifties and the aggressive woman of the eighties . . . it explores the unfulfilled promises of liberation and the personal disappointments many women have suffered in their quests for independence . . .it shows today's woman how to embrace her feminity and how to expand her capacity for love and bonding."

This book,better than any other I have read, addresses the true desires of today's woman in relation to men (feeling important, valued, special,feminine), how to achieve it (no one likes a shrew, acknowledge the needs of men, find fulfillment in your own identity) and why the independence that so attacts men SEEMS to ultimately turn them off.

Some of the "lies of liberation" include the idea that women and men are the same sexually and emotionally, that Doing is better than Being, and the idea that to be feminine is to be weak.

As a single daughter of a single mother, you can bet I was not terribly open to hearing about my own weakness or shortcomings. I always said I didn't need or want a man. But as I realized that was not true, I also did not want to be mistreated or lose my identity. This book showed me that uncommited sex truly did not meet my wants,because what I wanted was a committed relationship that would lead to marriage. Accepting less made me feel devalued and dependent.

To Be A Woman is to accept your femininity identity by Being (a hard concept I know) instead of defining yourself through what you own or do.This femininity attracts men who want to lead and protect - something women are dying to have but never seem to find. Then, when your man does something boneheaded (as he will sooner or later)your femininity allows you to "rise above" petty arguments to see the larger picture of a relationship where your husband is your hero, the man that you admire and trust.

The independence that so attracts men does not ultimately turn men off. Part of what turns them off is that most women have a horror of needing anyone.Needing someone seems to imply weakness and dependence.Sooner or later,most women start to feel that they are vulnerable to this dependence and do something to "prove" their independence by picking up the check,driving the car,opening their own door,etc.Let's face it,if these acts are so meaningless,why do women run to doors,yank them open and say, "I can do it myself!".Repeated acts like this show a man he is not needed,that the woman cannot give up the appearance of power or control to gain the true balance of give and take. No one,including men, likes someone who is so jealous of control that they cannot give up the minor things that allow a man to feel he is trusted,needed and important.

I was astonished to discover that MY ATTITUDE had a tremendous effect on my husband's behavior.When I argued,proved my point or "defended myself verbally" my husband would INVARIABLY argue back,shut down and become intractable in his opinion.Whereas if I allowed him to express his ideas (without name calling or expletives,those are walk-away situations)without my becoming inflamed,he usually became willing to listen to my short,to-the-point responses.My calmness would transmit to him and almost always defuses his anger.This is behavior I would have previously perceived as "weak" because it seems passive. But it is not.To choose behavior that attains the desired result is a powerful,active behavior.

To be able to radiate calm in stressful situations, to control my own (sometimes petty) behavior, to choose a life that fulfills my needs without expecting my husband to be the "end all, be all" that many books espouse - these are the things this book has helped me move toward.

I very much recommed this book for both single and married women for discovering your own motivations and behaviors that keep you from having the inner calmness and peace most of us desire.