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Rating: 
Summary: A life-changing book
Review: I'll admit, I picked up this book because the promised tales of infidelities, described on the back cover, sounded like they would make good fare for a lazy afternoon. What I got was a book that significantly changed the way I thought about marriage. Not married yet but in a serious relationship, this book opened my eyes to the divorce culture of America, a phenomenon I had read about but never considered deeply. Ms. Krasnow let her sources speak for themselves which gave the book a refreshing authenticity. I had never before thought about how going into marriage while keeping divorce in the back of your mind as an option almost dooms you to failure. Sad but ultimately uplifting and eye-opening, I recommend this book to everyone, but especially to those who are engaged or thinking about getting married.
Rating:
Summary: you need this book, but ignore the grammar
Review: In "Surrendering to Marriage" Iris Krasnow openly exposes an aspect of marriage that is generally not discussed - that the perfect marriage includes problems. With divorce so easy to come by and people entering into marriage with the concept that if it does not work then they can just get a divorce, it is refreshing to find someone who openly discusses the realities of marriage. Marriage requires committment, work and real personal growth as well as concession and recognition that people come into a marriage with their problems and quirks.
Drop the expectations of perfection and come to surrender to the fact that all marriages have problems. The grass is not greener on the other side. When you divorce and enter into a new marriage you bring the same you into the new marriage. The measuring stick of the perfect marriage is not that it has no problems but how the couple deals with their problems. This does not mean that all marriages can be or should be salvaged. There are situations such as abuse or life-threatening situations that may require a much more drastic course of action. While the author is full-force in favor of working through problems in a marriage, she does recognize that some situations require drastic action for your own protection. Full of actual interviews and real life situations, the book is insightful and to the point. Not only does it discuss the real life problems of marriage, but also the real life effect of radical actions such an extra-marital affair. Did it harm the marriage? Did it provide the excitement sought? Did it really provide a solution or even more problems? No sugar-coating of the truth here, just the cold, hard facts. While it is true that some marriages have more problems than others, Iris Krasnow's discussion of the realities of married life should be read by everyone contemplating marriage or married people contemplating a radical action. A highly recommended common sense, reality based book.
Rating: 
Summary: If You're Not A Yuppie...
Review: Iris Krasnow elegantly puts together her thoughts about marriage, all of them, the good, the bad and the ugly.
I really enjoy the way Krasnow writes with such honesty, humor and style. Your getting a slice of her life raw and uncensored. This is the best part of the book but can also be the most tedious. At times she seemed to repeat herself and tends as any mother does to wax a little long abut her four boys.
The book intersperses interviews with people of varying ages, both men and women with Krasnow's own insights. Some of these stories enraged me, some saddened me and still others gave some darn good advice.
In an era of disposable everything, it is refreshing to read Krasnow's view of honoring the promise made at the marriage ceremony..to stay in for the duration in good times and bad. Surrendering our need to pursue pleasure one hundred percent of the time and experience the darker side of the relationship we end with a truly deep, rich and satisfying state that only battered, weathered couples appreciate.
As Iris Krasnow so simply and insightfully puts it " And so we are bound, inextricably, working on making it until forever, one hour at a time." An insightful, humorous, sometimes painful look at a complex subject.
Rating: 
Summary: Marriage: the good, the bad and the ugly
Review: Iris Krasnow elegantly puts together her thoughts about marriage, all of them, the good, the bad and the ugly.
I really enjoy the way Krasnow writes with such honesty, humor and style. Your getting a slice of her life raw and uncensored. This is the best part of the book but can also be the most tedious. At times she seemed to repeat herself and tends as any mother does to wax a little long abut her four boys.
The book intersperses interviews with people of varying ages, both men and women with Krasnow's own insights. Some of these stories enraged me, some saddened me and still others gave some darn good advice.
In an era of disposable everything, it is refreshing to read Krasnow's view of honoring the promise made at the marriage ceremony..to stay in for the duration in good times and bad. Surrendering our need to pursue pleasure one hundred percent of the time and experience the darker side of the relationship we end with a truly deep, rich and satisfying state that only battered, weathered couples appreciate.
As Iris Krasnow so simply and insightfully puts it " And so we are bound, inextricably, working on making it until forever, one hour at a time." An insightful, humorous, sometimes painful look at a complex subject.
Rating:
Summary: I enjoyed this book
Review: My fiance's sister recommended this book to me six months ago but I never got around to it till last month when I saw it in the local library. I didn't know what to expect and I read the book with an open mind.
The insights I gained and thoughts I had about my own life and attitude towards marriage were enlightening, to say the least. I won't go so far as to say this book changed my life (I prefer not to be so dramatic), but Ms Krasnow certainly gave interesting ideas. Her unabashed honesty about her own marriage, as well as her ad verbatim accounts of her interviews, were heartfelt to the very end.
The epilogue was a nice surprise too. ;)
Rating:
Summary: Timely message and real life examples highlight this one
Review: Readers should know from the start that author Iris Krasnow does not use the word "surrender" to mean some meek, subservient resignation to marriage. She is writing instead of a brave, strong acceptance and commitment to marriage, which may also entail a surrendering of old myths and beliefs about romance, marriage and even personal fulfillment (if that fulfillment comes at the cost of the marriage and family). I enjoyed reading about her personal struggles as well as those of the couples she interviewed and found it refreshing that she was honest enough to admit that she once thought of marriage as a bad thing --- but no longer does. I found myself nodding my head in agreement with much of what she wrote and it certainly expanded my own view and reaffirmed my own belief that marriage, while imperfect, can also be deeply rewarding and fulfilling. Make no mistake- this isn't a book that glosses over the difficulties or the pain of marriage and it isn't a book that says staying married is easy (it often isn't, as most longtime spouses can attest). But it is a book that looks honestly at marriage and at couples from all walks of life and all levels of the commitment spectrum - from those who've hung in there to those who've left to build new lives - and at the challenges faced in those marriages. If you like books that tell it from a personal point of view and are also realistic and honest, this is a great read. If you're married, I'd say it should be at the top of your "to read" list. If you're considering divorce, read this one first. It may not change your mind but it will definitely help you to clarify your position and beliefs.
Rating: 
Summary: Cheater or cheating - this one is for you!
Review: The bulk of this book is devoted to the subject of cheating on your spouse, contemplating an affair or leaving your marriage to be with a lover. So if you are thinking of two-timing your partner or divorcing to be with someone else, this book may help you avoid making either of these very bad decisions. But if you are merely struggling with the fact that your husband or wife is driving you crazy and want to find out how to improve marital relations, you may want to search elsewhere. There are several situations noted in the book that most married persons can relate to and it is good to hear that other couples have the same issues, but I wasn't satisfied with the overall content and focus of the book.
Rating:
Summary: Mixed opinion
Review: When I first read this book I loved it. I was excited and felt better about my own situation. I poo-pooed all those other books out there that encourage women to go out and find happiness and joy, even if it means leaving a marriage. I quickly realized that there are two "schools of thought" for every subject worth discussion. This book is only one of those schools. Read it. Then go and read another book, one about taking a stand and leaving an unhappy marriage. Then, find your own school of thought and make your decisions. My final opinion on this book - it does have some good info and some of the real-life vignettes are interesting. But, the author encourages women to stay in a marriage that isn't so happy because the grass isn't always greener on the other side. Well, sometimes it is.
Rating:
Summary: Mixed opinion
Review: When I first read this book I loved it. I was excited and felt better about my own situation. I poo-pooed all those other books out there that encourage women to go out and find happiness and joy, even if it means leaving a marriage. I quickly realized that there are two "schools of thought" for every subject worth discussion. This book is only one of those schools. Read it. Then go and read another book, one about taking a stand and leaving an unhappy marriage. Then, find your own school of thought and make your decisions. My final opinion on this book - it does have some good info and some of the real-life vignettes are interesting. But, the author encourages women to stay in a marriage that isn't so happy because the grass isn't always greener on the other side. Well, sometimes it is.
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