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Rating: 
Summary: Is this my soul mate?
Review: "For someone seeking a meaningful and lasting relationship, today's dating scene can be brutal. You meet someone, begin dating, date more seriously, fall into a semi or full-time living-together arrangement-and then it doesn't work out, leaving one or both of you heartbroken." If you are a hopeless romantic, you probably think you will simply find the right person and get married. Not to mention living happily ever after. But do you know the right questions to ask? This book is more about applying the fundamental skills of SpeedDating to your own relationships and is based on the tenets of Jewish philosophy and wisdom. Speed Dating is about saving time in the dating process. If "What was I thinking" is your lament, then this book will provide the questions you should ask yourself, your date and others so you can evaluate your relationships more quickly before you commit hours of your time to a person you might really not be compatible with. You will learn: How to eliminate time-wasting, heartbreaking relationship habits
How to tell when you are "in love" and whether this will last
How to determine four levels of commonality with the person you are dating
How to accurately evaluate your date in the shortest amount of time
Tips for keeping dating productive as well as fun
Tools for discovering your date's true character The following questions are discussed in Part 1: 1. What is my desired outcome?
2. How can I tell When I'm in Love?
3. Am I attracted to who people are or to what they have or what they can do for me?
4. What do we have in common - and does it matter?
5. What type of person do I enjoy giving to?
6. Am I reliving the same bad date over and over again.
7. Am I spending as much time in product development as I am in marketing?
8. What do I like and respect about myself?
9. Who is my team?
10. Do I trust this is going to work out - that I will find my soul mate? Part 2 focuses on the SpeedDating way and includes "SpeedDating pacing"and more questions. 11. Do I enjoy being with this person?
12. What are my thoughts telling me - which should I listen to and which should I ignore.
13. Is this an action, or my interpretation of an action?
14. Is this relationship ready for physical intimacy?
15. What am I going to learn during this date?
16. Did my date pass the team screen?
17. How does my date behave when not on a date?
18. What challenges will this relationship have, and am I prepared to handle or live with these challenges long-term? You will also find out how to recognize a "shaper," "avoider," "defaulter," and "cynic." The section on chemistry is intriguing. There are aspects of love that cannot be expressed verbally. "If love is a feeling that mysteriously appears and disappears, how can we ever be certain that it won't suddenly disappear?" pg. 16 I could appreciate the section on how a "giver" and a "taker" can result in a painful situation. The taker has strong expectations that everyone should give to him and the giver often wants appreciation and doesn't receive it. As they say, giving to a taker is extremely painful. I think we all want to be appreciated for the gifts we give. The section on self-esteem was enlightening. Taking care of yourself physically and emotionally might also mean you are willing to be more aware of the needs of others. Never doubt that the small things count. Like how much TV a person watches or if they are interested in their health. The aspect of sexual relations is intriguing and from a Jewish perspective, physical intimacy is the merging of two souls. So, when you are intimate with someone your souls join and a part of each soul is exchanged. I also loved the chapter on Soul Mates. Do soul mates exist? Apparently a soul mate is the person who will help you reach your fullest potential, tolerate your flaws and love you for who you are. I don't think you can fully appreciate what a soul mate is until you have found them. I'm of the opinion that soul mates appear when you are supposed to change into who you are becoming and they don't normally appear a minute sooner. A book that tries to take the pain out of the dating game. It is based on the worldwide success of SpeedDating events. A thank you to R.H. for giving me this book to review. If you would like to send me a book to review, please see my about-you-area.
Rating:
Summary: Must Read!
Review: I have told many single friends this book is a "MUST READ". Since finishing the book I quite often look to it as a guide. I highly recommend this book.
Rating:
Summary: A must read tool for anyone on the dating scene
Review: I started reading the SpeedDating book about a month ago. I was skeptical at first as to how useful the information might be to me. Well, I'm only half-way through the book and have already drawn the conclusion that the information I've absorbed is invaluable. I am able to use examples provided in the book to reflect on past dating/relationship experiences and make connections with respect to the mistakes and errors in judgement that I have made in the past. I fully intend to complete the reading and pass it on to a lady friend of mine who is also in relationship limbo. My hope is that my future judgement lapses will be less and that I will not waste my time (and the time of others) in meaningless relationships. I recommend this book to anyone on the dating circuit, regardless of religon. While the cost of a hardbound book can scare off potential readers, think of it this way: The cost of this book is far less than one bad date. I would much rather spend my time curled up on the couch with quality reading than spend an evening looking at my watch wondering when the "date" will end. And when that "bad date" ends, where will I be: At home, curled up on the couch reading or watching TV, a bad taste in my mouth and alot less money in my pocket. A no brainer to me. Thank you Sue and Yaacov.
Rating:
Summary: A must read tool for anyone on the dating scene
Review: I started reading the SpeedDating book about a month ago. I was skeptical at first as to how useful the information might be to me. Well, I'm only half-way through the book and have already drawn the conclusion that the information I've absorbed is invaluable. I am able to use examples provided in the book to reflect on past dating/relationship experiences and make connections with respect to the mistakes and errors in judgement that I have made in the past. I fully intend to complete the reading and pass it on to a lady friend of mine who is also in relationship limbo. My hope is that my future judgement lapses will be less and that I will not waste my time (and the time of others) in meaningless relationships. I recommend this book to anyone on the dating circuit, regardless of religon. While the cost of a hardbound book can scare off potential readers, think of it this way: The cost of this book is far less than one bad date. I would much rather spend my time curled up on the couch with quality reading than spend an evening looking at my watch wondering when the "date" will end. And when that "bad date" ends, where will I be: At home, curled up on the couch reading or watching TV, a bad taste in my mouth and alot less money in my pocket. A no brainer to me. Thank you Sue and Yaacov.
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Summary: Wow - an awesome book the introduces speed dating
Review: I was quite impressed by the amount of material covered in this book. There were many questions that I had because we were running these events at the university and needed an overview of what to expect. I think that these people are pioneers in the Speed Dating world and if anybody wants to get good theoretical knowledge, they should definitely read this. It helped us create Match Majik http://www.matchmajik.com where we have feature a lot of their work and articles. A great start for anybody interested in Speed Dating!
Rating: 
Summary: Dating For Dweebs?
Review: If you think "Speed Dating" is going to be about those relatively new round-robin events you may have been hearing about lately where people get 6 or 10 mini-dates of something like 7 or 10 minutes duration each in one evening, that would be logical and yet you'd be wrong. Even though the authors claim to be the inventors of those now-popular events, and to have a decade's worth of experience putting such events on, this book isn't about that. It only gets eight superficial pages in the appendix, six of `em about the rules for such events. This is too bad because it would have been interesting to get the low-down on these things from some seasoned experts. Instead, the book is about a general, goal-directed dating philosophy based heavily on the Jewish Talmud (book of wisdom) which is designed to help you find - you guessed it - your "soul mate". Yes, it's another one of those kinds of books. It turns people/men into relationship objects and dating into work, helping one develop the equivalent of a "Man Plan". (Yes, the book tries to be gender neutral but it's clearly aimed at a female audience.) The goal, of course, is that holy grail of modern womanhood, marriage and happily-ever-after-land. One wonders when dating became so rule-laden. Even though the book is not very long, not to mention that it's broken down into inane bite-sized pieces, it doesn't seem probable that anyone trying to keep all this well-worn and old-fashioned advice in their head (if they don't already know the schtick) would be a very good date. It's especially annoying that the author's opinions are expressed as absolutes with continual cheery guarantees of eventual success if you just be yourself and do what they tell you to. Among the sillier ideas presented is the one about developing a "dating team" of qualified adults to help you prepare for the big day and disassemble the happenings afterword. There are even questions to ask on dates, as one zooms in on whether he is The One. I also thought their "key aspects of the personality" chart, which appeared a couple of times, was mostly bogus based on what I've studied about psychology. Doesn't the average consumer, in this world of nearly limitless choices, believe strongly that their possessions (the outermost and therefore least significant circle in their diagram) reflect their core values (the innermost circle in the diagram)? But the authors don't bother themselves with such considerations. Again, they simply state their half-baked notions as The Way It Is. Books like this are one of the reasons *why* "today's dating scene can be brutal" (the book's very first sentence). But, hey, even a crummy strategy is better than none at all. It worked for them -- though I got the impression they developed all these ideas *after* getting married -- so it could work for you too. Dream on IMO.
Rating: 
Summary: Comprehensive Dating Guide
Review: Speed Dating gives valuable information about locating your soul mate without waiting precious time. Many factors go into finding that special mate. Authors Yaacov and Sue Deyo advise inner personal qualities as more important than immediate physical chemistry. In addition, they stress the importance of having goals for yourself as well as a relationship. It is emphasized that no person is perfect. However, the authors advise that each person should determine which traits in a mate are extremely necesary and others are not necessary. The illustrations that support these points are excellent. This is an excellent book to re-read to further teach yourself good dating habits. It is a little basic in spots, but most open minded people can learn a great deal of Speed Dating.
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Summary: Great!
Review: The first thing you have to know about this book is that it is written by a Rabbi and his wife, so you are getting a Jewish perspecitve on how to date smarter. I am not Jewish and found their approach and much of their advice helpful, and you can too. Because of this however, the book is a bit conservative on the issues of physical intimacy. So if you buy this book thinking that SpeedDating is just an easy way to get laid, you are seriously mistaken. Since this book was written by two people, it is awkward to read. The reason I say this is the point of view changes constantly and I found this confusing. In high school English class I thought everyone was tought to use one point of view for their essay (even if it was co-authored) and stick with it. Yacoov and Sue Deyo (the authors) fail to do this with this book. I found the parts on what to do on specific dates to be very helpful. I also liked the idea of having a date coach, someone who you can talk with throughout the dating process. Also, their description of various types of relationships, particularly the shooting star relationship was very helpful. In fact, if Tommy Lee had read this part of the book, he would not have married Pamala Anderson after only knowing her for four days. He would have also avoided a jail sentence and a custody battle which resulted from this tumultuous shooting star relationship. That alone should be enough to convince you to buy this book (despite its awkward writing style)
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Summary: This book changed my life!
Review: This book teaches the world how to choose the right person and to not make the mistakes that inevitably lead to divorce. It's amazing how we can be fooled so easily - but having a guideline to help you avoid these mistakes is a priceless gift!! Thank you thank you thank you!
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Summary: Don't Date Without This Book!
Review: When you're ready to stop wasting time dating the wrong person, read this book. The Speeddating way is to ask your date the right questions early in the courtship to spot the red flags BEFORE you find yourself deeply involved with this person for the wrong reasons-reasons like convenience, security/lifestyle or simply because the sex is just too good! Asking targeted questions also helps you to discover your own core values and to search for a life partner who will share those values. The methodology outlined in this book significantly reduces the pain of dating. Believe me! Reading this book gave me new insight into why I married my ex-husband. We were what the authors call "defaulters-those who become so enmeshed in a relationship before making a commitment that they never really know where dating ends and the relationship begins." After living together in college and then moving cross country together for his law school, we eventually felt obligated toward marriage. We'd joke that our grandchildren's running gag about us would be, "Our grandparents lived together for 30 years and were married for 3." So we ultimately married because we couldn't imagine living without each other-not because we were so deeply in love-but because our coupledom was such a comfortable and professional and economically sustaining habit and because everyone in our families treating us accordingly. It took this book to clarify the obvious: that dating is a process, dating is not the relationship. Based on a system of core values that started to emerge when we discussed having children, my ex and I couldn't have been more diametrically opposed in the areas of religion, lifestyle and balancing household responsibilities. So, please, save yourself heartache and years of treading water in a wrong relationship. If you're not on the same page as your partner, it's because YOU didn't ask the right questions and align yourself with someone whose heart is in the same place as yours. You want to be with someone in whom you see greatness and who sees greatness in you. This book shows you how to take responsibility for who you really are and how to attract the partner who will help you realize your full potential.
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