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Summary: Thank You book is a restorative gem-my story
Review: I am finishing an internship position working under a supervisor whose leadership style was a mix of authoritarian/ laisse faire. Metaphorically, I was in boot camp/ either sinking or teaching myself to swim. I was weak with writing paperwork and it often resulted in my supervisor ridiculing me to the whole department. I sometimes had to stand up to the supervisor without unleashing my wrangling emotions. I had to be very clear, justify my actions and not hold resentment. In other words, discipline myself. This book gives the mentholated rub needed. It is very helpful. It is very instructional, offering lots of techniques, warmth, and beautiful insight into a painful situation. Yes it is a gem of a book. It allowed me to stay in the training and learn to be more effective and efficient. The big bonus is that I grew emotionally. I learned to sit more with difficult emotions.
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Summary: I LOVE this book!
Review: I have told several people about this book and just loaned my copy to a friend. I found the exercises helpful as well, especially the one in which you write down things others have said to you that have affected you positively or negatively in your life. It gave me a deeper understanding of the power of our words. We don't always know how they will affect others. It is a great book becuase it reels you in with its title, but then makes you realize the role you play in your own difficulties with others within its pages. A valuable read!
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Summary: An interesting take on how to handle troublesome people.
Review: Mark Rosen, in his wonderfully titled book, "Thank You for Being Such a Pain," has an interesting point of view. He believes that dealing with the difficult people in our lives (and we all have them) can help us grow spiritually and emotionally. If we step back from a troubling situation and try to be objective about difficult people, whether they are our bosses, our relatives, our friends, or our neighbors, we can deal with them more effectively. Rosen goes further. He feels that there is a reason that difficult people come into our lives. They are there to teach us such important lessons as how NOT to treat other people. In addition, as we deal with people who are "pains in the neck," we can learn empathy and we can improve our communication skills. It sounds good, but does it work? I admit that I have to deal with some difficult people and I tried to use some of Dr. Rosen's advice. Sometimes it worked and sometimes it didn't. However, his words do come back to me during the course of the day, and I think that his message is worthwhile. You have nothing to lose and everything to gain from trying a new approach with those people who make your life miserable. Dr. Rosen's sense of humor and commonsense approach are refreshing and I recommend this book highly.
Rating:
Summary: An interesting take on how to handle troublesome people.
Review: Mark Rosen, in his wonderfully titled book, "Thank You for Being Such a Pain," has an interesting point of view. He believes that dealing with the difficult people in our lives (and we all have them) can help us grow spiritually and emotionally. If we step back from a troubling situation and try to be objective about difficult people, whether they are our bosses, our relatives, our friends, or our neighbors, we can deal with them more effectively. Rosen goes further. He feels that there is a reason that difficult people come into our lives. They are there to teach us such important lessons as how NOT to treat other people. In addition, as we deal with people who are "pains in the neck," we can learn empathy and we can improve our communication skills. It sounds good, but does it work? I admit that I have to deal with some difficult people and I tried to use some of Dr. Rosen's advice. Sometimes it worked and sometimes it didn't. However, his words do come back to me during the course of the day, and I think that his message is worthwhile. You have nothing to lose and everything to gain from trying a new approach with those people who make your life miserable. Dr. Rosen's sense of humor and commonsense approach are refreshing and I recommend this book highly.
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Summary: Genuine Help for Dealing with Truly Difficult People
Review: This book gave me insights into the challenge of dealing with difficult people that I had never had before. Mark Rosen draws on a wide range of spiritual sources to address the complex issues of facing and dealing with people who are hard for us to deal with. I got some great new ideas and approaches for some of the really tough people. He also points out that we too may be difficult, it is not a one way street. I highly recommend this book for anyone seeking true, but not easy guidance for spiritual development.
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Summary: A excellent book
Review: This book is a very beautiful piece of work, and I am shoked that there is not at least 700 reveiws each with it's very deserving 5 stars. If you have read this book and are reading this review please do your part and put in some well desearving praise for this book. This book will benifit you best if you have some sense of spirituality (god).One of the many beautiful things about this book is this statemant that he makes that he follows. he said I find it very difficult to write about spiritual ideas without a reference to a concept of god. for me, trying to write a book with a spiritual message that avoids references to a suprime reality is like tring to write a cookbook without references to food. Still I have made an effort to be sensitive to the varied notions of god that we all carry. In the course of my studies and teaching, I have met many peiople who carry a negitive concept of god becuase of the way religion was tought to them in their early years. pediatric religion, in my opinion, is biggest reason why New age concepts of spirituality have for many suplainted traditional religious practices. In attempt to avoid negitive reactions, I alternate the terms universe and holy one in this book with the term gode in the liturgy of my own tradition, simultaneously conveying divinity and unity. Feel free to substitute your own termanology if you so desire. I like what he wrote here becuase3 it dosen't shove anything down your throat or put other religions down. It goes more into spirituality rather than religion, but it has many refrences to the bible and other religious practices as exampes of different points he is tring to make. So this book covers the basics, and there is nothing that he writes that any religion could really argue with to much, or at all I don't think who knows. This book is about taking responsibility for yourself and not leting others dictate your actions. It is very thought provoking making you look at things from a optimistic stand point. Out of the many books I have read I have found this one to be the best book I have ever read. Highly recomended
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Summary: A Great Book
Review: This book is really well-written, full of insight, with interesting ideas about our relationship with God and other humans. The author gives many suggestions for dealing with the emotional (and physical, spiritual, etc.) damage that difficult people inflict on those around them. There are all kinds of cathartic "exercises" described, everything from physical activity, to writing letters & journaling, to giving silent blessings, to prayer, and more. What causes some difficult people to behave the way they do? How can we change our own behavior to better interact with them? What do we have to learn from difficult people? How can we learn to forgive? Many important questions are explored and answered. I would recommend this book to anyone.
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Summary: Dealing with the difficult becomes easier!
Review: This book was an enormous aid to me in dealing with some uncomfortable relationships. Putting the tensions in a spiritual context helped me to get a clearer sense of the learning that was taking place. This is a major tool for understanding and compassion. A must read!
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Summary: "Difficult people" as a Divine gift
Review: This excellent book is almost a commentary on Joseph's remark to his brothers at Genesis 50:20: "Although you intended me harm, God intended it for good." For Mark Rosen's basic outlook is that "difficult" people are sent to us in fulfillment of Divine purposes, one of which is to help us grow spiritually.I say "almost" because Rosen is careful not to assume that "difficult" people really _do_ intend harm; on the contrary, he repeatedly contends, many apparently difficult people don't really have any idea that they're doing something wrong. For that matter, many of them _aren't_ doing anything wrong; sometimes the problem is in ourselves only, and _we_ are the ones who are being "difficult." (Everybody is difficult to somebody, says Rosen. And genuine evil, he thinks, is a rarity, although it does exist.) But however that may be, Rosen takes the view that there is a spiritual lesson for us hidden inside every one of our dealings with other people, that we will have to keep retaking the lesson until we learn it, and that ultimately the only way to guarantee that we can deal effectively with "difficult" people is to change ourselves in accordance with such lessons. And in chapter after chapter, he sets out exercises and questions that are intended to help us do just that. Rosen's approach is firmly grounded in Judaism (and clearly inspired by the Musar movement, especially R. Moshe Hayyim Luzzatto's _The Path of the Upright_, from which Rosen quotes on page one). But he is careful to present advice that carries over to other religions and spiritual traditions, and indeed to quote from representatives of those traditions -- or of none -- when they have something apropos to say. (I like his choices; his quotations range from Ambrose Bierce's "Devil's Dictionary" to Saint Jerome to Shakespeare to Groucho Marx to the Christian New Testament.) It is therefore suitable for readers of any religious persuasion, although for obvious reasons it will be most helpful to readers who believe in a providential God. The exercises themselves look helpful, and although I haven't tried many of them yet, they seem to comport very well with the sorts of things I already do. And aside from the exercises themselves, the book is full of terrific advice, in particular on the subject of taking an interest in other people's well-being without turning oneself into a doormat. If Rosen's approach were more widely adopted, it would not only grease the wheels of our relationships with those we find "difficult," but also go some way toward restoring the idea of a "common good" to the place of respect it deserves. For Rosen's most essential advice is surely that we need not sacrifice our own interests in promoting those of others -- that, on the contrary, the most effective way of dealing with "difficult" people is to realize that we are on the same side if only we could see it.
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Summary: Thank You book is a restorative gem-my story
Review: This is a wonderful book that combines religion (with a mostly Jewish perspective, but allows for generic interpretation) and dealing with difficult people. An interesting tenet Rosen introduces is that God or "the universe" is constantly "testing" you by exposing you to difficult people. God is testing your response to these people, and Rosen gives you tools to cope and possibly resolve issues. He also uses stories from the Torah (the old testament) to illustrate his ideas and philosophies.
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