Recovering From Rape

Rating:
Summary: Recovering from Rape
Review: I am a survivor of ongoing childhood sexual assault and rape by multiple offenders. I have read many books on incest and sexual abuse, and most of the help I need falls into that category. However, as a survivor of multiple rapes (during my teens and early adulthood) I felt that I needed some help and education to understand that aspect of my life. I liked that this book remains aware of the fact that many people who are raped are also survivors of incest (and previous rapes). I especially found her discussions of gang rape helpful (to understand why people do this and the motivations behind it). It was also helpful that she addresses the feelings of children and pre-teens that have been raped.

This book discusses rape myths and helped me to understand that the rapes I endured were not my fault (for not being able to protect myself from the rape). We can do our best to protect ourselves, but the rapist is responsible for his actions. Her discussion of significant others also helped me to understand the misdirected anger expressed by one of my loved ones when I told him about the rapes. Also her discussion of sociocultural preventive strategies was very reassuring to me that there is hope for ending the frequency of sexual violence. It was also very helpful that she provides extensive information about the legal aspects of prosecuting rape, and of rape laws (I am glad to hear the definitions of rape are broadening). Linda Ledray is a very caring woman, she is sensitive to the feelings of rape survivors, and aware of how often rape and child abuse occurs. Linda works in a rape crisis center, and she provides a somewhat extensive listing of rape crisis centers across the United States. It is very important that people be educated about the usefulness of rape crisis/women�s centers (no matter what stage of healing you are in).

It was helpful to hear other examples of rape, but sometimes it was too triggering to hear so many horrible experiences all at once (during the time that I was trying to heal myself). However, the stories she included were very important for educating people about how easily a rapist can lie, be believed, and not be convicted (as well as how often people in law enforcement believe rapists deserve to be protected from the stigma of a rape conviction). The examples also helped me to understand my own reactions to the rapes I endured (for that reason it was good that she included examples of many different experiences). The most difficult aspect of the book was reading about the mentality of a rapist.

This book is only a beginning to healing, and you may need to read other books to understand more of the complex and long term reactions that you may be experiencing. If you struggle with chronic post-traumatic stress disorder a book that I have found very helpful is �The Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder Sourcebook� by Glenn Schiraldi.

Good luck to you all on your journey to healing!

Rating:
Summary: Recovering from Rape
Review: I am a survivor of ongoing childhood sexual assault and rape by multiple offenders. I have read many books on incest and sexual abuse, and most of the help I need falls into that category. However, as a survivor of multiple rapes (during my teens and early adulthood) I felt that I needed some help and education to understand that aspect of my life. I liked that this book remains aware of the fact that many people who are raped are also survivors of incest (and previous rapes). I especially found her discussions of gang rape helpful (to understand why people do this and the motivations behind it). It was also helpful that she addresses the feelings of children and pre-teens that have been raped.

This book discusses rape myths and helped me to understand that the rapes I endured were not my fault (for not being able to protect myself from the rape). We can do our best to protect ourselves, but the rapist is responsible for his actions. Her discussion of significant others also helped me to understand the misdirected anger expressed by one of my loved ones when I told him about the rapes. Also her discussion of sociocultural preventive strategies was very reassuring to me that there is hope for ending the frequency of sexual violence. It was also very helpful that she provides extensive information about the legal aspects of prosecuting rape, and of rape laws (I am glad to hear the definitions of rape are broadening). Linda Ledray is a very caring woman, she is sensitive to the feelings of rape survivors, and aware of how often rape and child abuse occurs. Linda works in a rape crisis center, and she provides a somewhat extensive listing of rape crisis centers across the United States. It is very important that people be educated about the usefulness of rape crisis/women's centers (no matter what stage of healing you are in).

It was helpful to hear other examples of rape, but sometimes it was too triggering to hear so many horrible experiences all at once (during the time that I was trying to heal myself). However, the stories she included were very important for educating people about how easily a rapist can lie, be believed, and not be convicted (as well as how often people in law enforcement believe rapists deserve to be protected from the stigma of a rape conviction). The examples also helped me to understand my own reactions to the rapes I endured (for that reason it was good that she included examples of many different experiences). The most difficult aspect of the book was reading about the mentality of a rapist.

This book is only a beginning to healing, and you may need to read other books to understand more of the complex and long term reactions that you may be experiencing. If you struggle with chronic post-traumatic stress disorder a book that I have found very helpful is 'The Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder Sourcebook' by Glenn Schiraldi.

Good luck to you all on your journey to healing!

Rating:
Summary: An "ok" book.
Review: I am a therapist working in a college counseling center, and I often recommend this book to clients who have been victims of rape. It provides excellent educational material, including a review of rape myths, information on typical effects of a rape, guidelines for significant others, and much more. In addition, Ledray takes her readers through the legal process of prosecuting a rapist in a step-by-step fashion. My only caveat is that this book focuses more on stranger rape rather than the more prevalent date rape, but despite this, it is a valuable resource.

Rating:
Summary: An excellent guide book for rape survivors.
Review: I am a therapist working in a college counseling center, and I often recommend this book to clients who have been victims of rape. It provides excellent educational material, including a review of rape myths, information on typical effects of a rape, guidelines for significant others, and much more. In addition, Ledray takes her readers through the legal process of prosecuting a rapist in a step-by-step fashion. My only caveat is that this book focuses more on stranger rape rather than the more prevalent date rape, but despite this, it is a valuable resource.

Rating:
Summary: Good for the "Basics"
Review: I bought this book after my first assault and am now re-reading it for a 3rd time, having been raped again. It is a GREAT book for the "basics". On the survivor's side, Dr. Ledray reminds you that you are not alone and you are not going crazy. She discusses the steps in everything from complete denial to going to court to STD's. For the secondary victim's (signifigant others), this book is not going to tell you everything that you want to know, but it can at least get you moving in the right direction.

Dr. Ledray does know survivors and that may be why she comes across as a "fear all men" kind of woman. But what she is truly expressing is that most survivors fear all men.

When I met my fiance, one year after my first rape, he had never known anyone who had been raped before. I kept asking him to read the book, because I couldn't explain to him what I needed or make him understand how I felt. About 3 months before my second rape, he read the book and he and I both saw a change in our relationship. After I came home from the hospital, he didn't ask why I felt a certain way or why I couldn't let it go. He had some sense of how I felt and how traumatizing it was for me.

Just don't buy this book to be the "fix" for everything. It's not, but it is a step in the right direction.

Rating:
Summary: Helped me through difficult times
Review: I bought this book shortly after I was sexually assaulted by a stranger last year. It has helped me greatly and also my new partner who did not know me at the time of the attack as he was able to read all the sections for 'the significant other'.

It provides good, hands on advice on how to take control of your life again. I suffered from terrible depression after the attack and this book provided lots of tips on how to get through this. My only reservations about the book are that it is for an American audience, (I think a British version coudl be written) and the descriptions of other cases I found too upsetting shortly after the attack.

On the whole though, an excellent book and I have recommended to all people I have met who have had a similar experience to mine.

Rating:
Summary: Wasn't Very Helpful
Review: I really hated it. It seemed like the author hated all men and blamed all men for it. It made me really sad and did not help in my recovery. It may be a good source for friends of the victim but it isn't very helpful to the victim.

Rating:
Summary: Good information if you can get past the politics
Review: Rape is one of those many real things in the life of humans that shatter good old time notions like "God never gives you more than you can handle" or "Everything happens for a reason", implying a "good" reason if we're bright enough to learn from it. What's to be gained from such an experience as rape? Just punishment? A sense of satisfaction for the rest of us because it didn't happen to us? Support for the notion "God works in mysterious ways"? Such adolescent ideas are one of the many reasons rape victims are further humiliated as made clear by this author.

Having encountered a woman who suffered rape I realized this was something I knew nothing about. As a male raised in a pre-60s atmosphere where respect for women was still taught to boys by parents - not by absent parents allowing Emenim to do the teaching - rape was too foreign for me to comprehend. In addition the advantages ambulance-chasing lawyers and fanatic feminists have taken by inventing rape victims made me suspicious of some claims made, including the now infamous assertion that all human males are born rapists and murderers. This author defines even "undress you looks" and catcalls as "small rapes". Thus not only reducing those who have been truly raped, but losing credibility by such ridiculous claims. Are we to believe that 1 in 4 women will be raped? Naturally, if definitions become as flimsy as those purported in this book then anything is rape so numbers become stratospheric. How can we know? By the time the author has made this reference the critical reader is long pondering agendas.

Human males are not generally born evil, but some become that way. By the numbers such males are fabulously rare, but they exist and perhaps more than most suspect. Like a single CFC responsible for the destruction of countless ozone molecules, a single rapist can cause irreconcilable damage to many and, as this book clarifies, to more than the rape victim. Which is not to take priority from the one most in need of assistance. That assistance comes in two forms - understanding and justice. The text goes some distance in directing how to assist understanding and warns about the typical response - "it's the victims fault". She is right about rape myths maintaining views of social order. Humans embrace what makes us comfortable, regardless of truth. It's clear to anyone with a brain that rape is not a crime of passion but rather one of violence and the author makes this clear for those who don't already know it.

This book shows the rest of us what rape is like from numerous examples of modern women facing Medieval minds on the matter, painting the event on the inside of our skull. Once done, anger clouds our view but the author does, finally, keep us on track to recovery and not for us but for the survivor. Despite indicting males through sweeping generalizations this book is likely to assist those in need, hopefully without additional damage by the author's personal axe to grind.

One day, when America becomes wise enough to intelligently combat evil at home, not simply abroad, one hopes this evil will undergo its own campaign of eradication. Violent boys, inadequate and inferior, may need counseling but they respond to threats from their own quiver. The threat of certain execution through lethal injection for rapes with DNA evidence, proven in a court of law might go far in containing homeland terrorists and remove parasites less than animals from society.

Rating:
Summary: An excellent tool for recovery
Review: This book is an excellent choice for survivors, friends and family, and professionals going through the recovery process. It goes step by step through the recovery process for both the survivor and his/her family and friends. I actually first read this book in a course on Violence Against Women. I later found out that it is also used in the Sexual Assualt program at the Women's Crisis Center I work at. Now that I have taken the position as Sexual Assault Advocate, I will continue to use it in my work and reccommend it to my clients.

Rating:
Summary: Wonderful insight
Review: What a wonderfully honest book! It shares the heartbreak of what rape does to the human soul. I also highly recommend reading Peaceful Heart: A Woman's Journey of Healing, by Aimee Jo Martin....a book that is a true testament to the human spirit.