Rating: 
Summary: Un-demonizes kinky love-styles
Review: Human sexuality has a much wider spectrum than we've been taught by the propaganda we're force-fed all our lives. I learned that once, when I came out a dyke at age 19, and I learned it yet again when I came out into BDSM last year at age 40, never before having put two and two together between BDSM and the fantasies I've had my whole life long. I kept them secret because I was ashamed of them. If there's one thing this book did for me, it was to help me realize I wasn't so unusual, wasn't a sicko after all and had no cause for shame. (Yeah, yeah, I know some readers of this review will disagree -- so what, get a life.) Many of the kinks discussed in this book aren't my kink, but the lesson is there: we are vast in our expression and in our needs. I wish the understanding contained in this book had been made available to me, and to everybody else, a long time ago. It would have prevented much needless suffering, especially that horrible suffering of feeling forced to hide oneself from one's loved ones. Besides that, it's a good and informative book about BDSM and the BDSM scene, though if you're looking for "how-tos", that's not this book's purpose.
Rating:
Summary: The truth about those of us in the Life.
Review: I been involved in a true 24/7 BDSM Lifestyle for the past 25 years. Most of the books written on the subject were either pornographic in nature and/or lacking in the true understanding of the proper dynamics in a healthy consensual BDSM Lifestyle. This book is WONDERFUL. I completely agree with every aspect of this book. It is so well written and so informative and accurate.
I usually do not read BDSM books because so many books are filled with fantasy/nonsense. This book was refreshing. My slave and I read a chapter at a time and discussed the topics. I enjoyed the authors interviewing REAL people in the Life. You may not like/enjoy all the activities in each chapter (who does!) but it is worth reading about and expanding your mind. I give this book an extremely high rating and feel that the novice out there would do her/him self a service to take the time to read this book. Even for those weekend warriors out there.......you can learn from this book. Pleased in Texas
Rating: 
Summary: More about people then what to do
Review: If you are looking for a book that shows that people are into BDSM and that you're not alone, then go ahead and pick up this book. It is laden with interviews but doesn't have much in way of instruction or how to keep things safe. If you looking of a "How To" book, I would recommend SM101 by Jay Wiseman. Differnt Loving covers some basic wintout really getting into anything. The interviews are good as they give you some insight to other's mentality. If you totally new to BDSM (which I am) and have read nothing else this might be a good place to start.
Rating:
Summary: This is the Best
Review: If you are looking for an overview of all that the BDSM lifestyle has to offer, then this book is for you. The interviews cover everything the curious could consider and a few things that a more active player could learn from.I've read this book more than once and always learn something from each reading.
Rating: 
Summary: long boring work of different loving
Review: If you're into lots of personal stories and testimonials, then this book is for you. The book drags on and on. I felt as if the author was making the whole subject of alternative sexual practices clinical to avoid discouraging people from the subject.Its safe to say that not everyone is into dominance and submission as a sexual playtime activity, but if you are or at least have an interest in it, the last thing you need is this book of drivel to help you along in this 'play time'. But, if you're writing a college paper on sexual deviance or what ever the mainstream happens to call it now, this book will give plenty of quotables for you to add. There is absolutely no 'how-to'. Nothing to tell to pique the imagination.
Rating:
Summary: Wonderful Overview
Review: Personally, I am not new to the concept of D/s, but I am new to the idea that there are more, many more, people who share the same sexual/lifestyle tendancies as myself. This book is not a how-to, it is not a guide, it is more a psychological, or psychosexual if you prefer, venture that attempts to give an overview of many of the aspects of D/s and S/M. Granted, there is a lot of lumping together, and generalization, but when you are dealing with something as varied and as individual as D/s experiences and practices, it is hard to itemize every single one. On the whole I was very impressed with the book. It covered aspects of D/s that I am familar with, others that I was not, and the interviews gave voice to the individuality that the book in and of its self was not able to convey. Since I am not a veteran of D/s, I can not say whether or not such people would find the book very helpful or intriguing, but for a novice, just taking her first baby steps into the realm of alternate sexuality, it was an eye opening experience, and made huge strides towards easing my feelings of being alone, or abnormal. Even if you aren't interested in D/s specifically, but are a student of human behavior, mentality and sexuality, I would reccomend it. It is very candid and straightforward in its approach, using language that is not so highly technical to be baffling. But, at the same time, it is not written down to the reader. Again, a highly recommended read.
Rating:
Summary: Wonderful Overview
Review: Personally, I am not new to the concept of D/s, but I am new to the idea that there are more, many more, people who share the same sexual/lifestyle tendancies as myself. This book is not a how-to, it is not a guide, it is more a psychological, or psychosexual if you prefer, venture that attempts to give an overview of many of the aspects of D/s and S/M. Granted, there is a lot of lumping together, and generalization, but when you are dealing with something as varied and as individual as D/s experiences and practices, it is hard to itemize every single one. On the whole I was very impressed with the book. It covered aspects of D/s that I am familar with, others that I was not, and the interviews gave voice to the individuality that the book in and of its self was not able to convey. Since I am not a veteran of D/s, I can not say whether or not such people would find the book very helpful or intriguing, but for a novice, just taking her first baby steps into the realm of alternate sexuality, it was an eye opening experience, and made huge strides towards easing my feelings of being alone, or abnormal. Even if you aren't interested in D/s specifically, but are a student of human behavior, mentality and sexuality, I would reccomend it. It is very candid and straightforward in its approach, using language that is not so highly technical to be baffling. But, at the same time, it is not written down to the reader. Again, a highly recommended read.
Rating:
Summary: Different Loving, a review
Review: The authors' stated goals in writing "Different Loving" are to "explain what people do, why they do it, and what they get out of it" (12). They admit to being neither scientists, psychologists, or sociologists; they do not pretend to take a quantitative approach, but they do take issue with previously presented theories concerning the implications of people's sexual practices. They begin by asking "What is normal ?" and note that if "normal" means reproductive relevance as in the Victorian standard, then few are normal. Domination and submission, sadism and masochism; including bondage, spanking, whipping, intense stimulation, body modification, corsetting, piercing, and scarification; age play including: adolescentilism, juvenilism, and autonepiophilia; roleplaying, tattooing, fetishism, dressing for pleasure; transgenderism including: transvestism, transsexualism, as well as water sports, etc. are covered. Chapter are divided into: who, what, when, where, why, the history, dangers, joys of, and interviews with people who participate in various sexual practices. Although it is acknowledged that some activity in childhood usually contributed to the adult's sexual preferences, the argument about nature verses nurture is as alive in "Different Loving" as it is in the rest of science, psychology, and sociology. What is clear is that what is painful for some is pleasurable for others, what is unacceptable for some is delightful for others, what is frightening for some is a natural high for others. "Different Loving" gives a compassionate view of those whose activities have been rejected by society. For example, a young man strongest desire is to be a baby, held by a loving other, cared fore, and loved. Often this is the result of not feeling accepted or loved as an actual child. When this man is brought to a party dressed in a diaper and urinates on himself and is cleaned and re-diapered by the host in front of the other party-goers, he experiences a tremendous amount of acceptance. This is what people in sexual oriented communities provide for each other, a place where they can be themselves, revel in their differences, and be accepted. Often in psychological therapy a re-experiencing of life experiences is a basic element in healing. It is easy to see that what the young man in the above mentioned example is doing in attempting to re-experience his childhood in a way that allows the drama to turn out with favorable results. Further he has sexualized the behavior, so that, rather than trying to find healing the way a person in therapy might do, he is titillated and excited by the behavior. This type of behavior, although not as common as some that exist in the D&S* community serves to exemplify the types of behavior that, although not generally accepted by society, can become an integral part of people's sexual makeup and sense of selves. Others can be as harmless as that of a man attracted to women in high heel shoes, or as frightening as a desire to pierce, scar, and alter the body, or to inflict pain on others, or to have pain inflicted on the self. Not everyone in the D&S community is accepting of others. In fact the authors state that often those with one kind of perversion** can be absolutely abhorrent of those with another. However, people who themselves have had a difficult time gaining acceptance are usually more accepting of the differences in others than those in the outside world. "Different Loving" gives voice to the desires of the unaccepted, makes those who feel such desires human, nurtures compassion for what might have previously been difficult to accept, and creates a space where understanding can begin. For someone embarking on a career in psychotherapy, especially if they are going to consider a foray into sexual therapy, it is a book that should be read in order to be prepared to deal with whatever sexual experience a client might bring. * "We use the term D&S to describe erotic activities more commonly known as sadomasochism or bondage and discipline" (4). **Note: I use the word perversion here as it might be seen by the outside community, and not as it would be perceived by those in the D&S community.
Rating: 
Summary: Dominance and Submission, by fermed
Review: This book attempts to present the question of erotic domination and submission in a dry, even puritanical, fashion. As a result it is often humorless and tedious. It is understandibly difficult, of course, to maintain a light touch while trying to explain how being urinated upon can be a joyful and erotic event. And yet this is an important book. It contains the statements of practitioners of the various sexual modalities described, explaining the erotic derivatives that attend these voluntary exchanges of power. Many of the speakers describe their backgrounds and the childhood experiences which might lie at the root of their sexual interests; they explain how such sexual interactions make them feel. This is likely to be a useful book for those who have cravings along the behaviors described, but who lack either the courage or the opportunity to actualize their fantasies. The book will offer such people a reassuring reading experience which in turn may guide them towards satisfying their urges. It is also a good book for those engaged in counseling others, for it gives many insights into the dynamics, mechanics, and social expression of this type of sexuality. "Different Loving" consists of 26 chapters that cover from the expected topics (bondage, spanking) to the lesser known or understood behaviors (golden showers, enemas). It has a fair bibliography and chapter notes, but no index. It is a good reference book, but not something one would want to sit down and read from cover to cover as a form of entertainment. Which it is not.
Rating:
Summary: Great for people who are worried about themselves!
Review: This book is fun to read and extremely informative to people who know little about alternate styles. A lot of good, rational people harbor some kind of S&M fantasies and beat themselves up about it (pardon the pun). This book can be a real godsend to them. It describes many different things including spanking, bondage, domination, etc. Is it informative for people who have lived the BDSM lifestyle for a long time? Well, I don't know. But I would STRONGLY recommend it for a person who harbors fantasies that he/she is uncomfortable about.
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