On Apology

Rating:
Summary: The missing link for forgiveness
Review: So much has been written in recent years about the need for forgiveness. In Dr. Lazare's groundbreaking book, he points out how so little has been written about apology (his is only the second book devoted to this subject to be published in the past decade!), and yet a sincere and honest apology is essential for complete forgiveness. It is one of the main reasons so many of us hold on to grudges for years. We cannot fully forgive without this missing piece of the puzzle.

Dr. Lazare beautifully explains the differences between a "false apology" and a true apology, why people (and groups and nations) have difficulty apologizing, what constitutes a satisfying apology, and what rewards both parties (the offended party and the offender) can get from an honest apology. Dr. Lazare has done his research -- there are extensive references throughout, and the book leans toward the scholarly side. Yet it is well-written, thoughtful, and personable, and the author often interjects a few engaging stories about his own direct experiences with the subject, making the writing warm and personalized.

This is a book everyone should read -- parents, spouses, children, siblings, employers, employees, managers, leaders, politicians, teachers, physicians, healthcare workers, and attorneys. The art of apology should be an integral component of conflict resolution, mediation, and restorative justice. For those who have been injured or offended by the deliberate or unintentional actions of other people (and that pretty much includes all of us), real healing cannot begin until we receive the sincere apology we need and crave. For those who have injured or offended others (again, that pretty much includes all of us), we can't begin our own healing process without completing the full requirements of a sincere apology.

This book is a testament to how the seemingly simple act of apology can heal centuries-old wounds, bridge cultural and international misunderstandings, dissolve bitterness and resentment, and restore relationships of every kind. This is a book you will want everyone you know to read, and one that you will remember the contents of long after you close the covers.

Rating:
Summary: "Sorry" is not a four letter word
Review: This book is a great read! I bought this book having no idea the impact it would have on my life. Dr. Lazare offers concrete tools and guidance to anyone who needs to make an apolgy (and who isn't in THAT boat?) and gives inspiration to strengthen relationships through examples of individuals, groups, and nations. I learned a lot on a personal level as well as gaining an understanding of global issues that have been impacted by apologies, or lack thereof. In a time when we all look for peace and search for hope, this book is a great place to start.

Rating:
Summary: Apology is not Apologia, it is more profound!
Review: This erudite, informative and exceedingly engaging book On Apology almost seemed like a suspense novel, so much was my interest and involvement in the subject aroused. I am sure to refer to it repeatedly and expect to use it as a guide in many future personal and professional negotiations in my life. The universal application of the analysis to our daily lives as humans is striking. It also seems highly relevant for the times because of the many recent apologies being offered by well-known individuals, and even more so for the ones that need to be offered. The deconstruction process that the author takes the reader through is incredibly enlightening. Thanks to what I learned from this book, I can now see so clearly what is missing or self-serving in the statements made by for example, Dan Rather and Jimm Swaggert in the last few weeks alone. The outright lack of remorse and humility in these apologies is appaling and would have been missed by me previously. The book is also amazing in its scope and thorough research. I have particularly enjoyed the personal anecdotes and examples the author provided, which bring such a human touch to everything and is profoundly moving. It takes great courage to speak out about such things, and this author seems to do it so effortlessly. Bravo!