The Story of My Father

Rating:
Summary: Losing a father, finding a self
Review: I have not been so moved by a book since the death of my own father 10 years ago. Sue Miller's memoir of her father's last years with Alzheimer's Disease tells the reader more about her than about her father. Her ability to stay connected to the complexity of feelings she experienced, even when they overwhelmed her and she couldn't articulate them, is astounding. Most moving of all is her father's final gift to her - a much deeper understanding of herself, of him. and of their relationship.

Rating:
Summary: I am Not the only one...
Review: It was nice to read of Sue's experience, as I am now going down a simalar path with my mother. There were many things she said that are happening in my case and it was indeed good to know I was not alone. I have similar thoughts and feelings and to see the similarities to my mom's case was enlightening. The book will make the next steps easier as I know much more what to expect from the disease and what I can do and to asuage my guilt feelings. Thanks for writing this.

Rating:
Summary: I am Not the only one...
Review: It was nice to read of Sue's experience, as I am now going down a simalar path with my mother. There were many things she said that are happening in my case and it was indeed good to know I was not alone. I have similar thoughts and feelings and to see the similarities to my mom's case was enlightening. The book will make the next steps easier as I know much more what to expect from the disease and what I can do and to asuage my guilt feelings. Thanks for writing this.

Rating:
Summary: Not a complete waste of time...
Review: Maybe it's because I don't have a parent currently struggling with Alzheimer's or maybe because I was listening to the book and not actually reading it, but when the second CD ended, I just couldn't bring myself to put the third one in. I felt almost as if I was caught in the hallway with a coworker who kept droning on and on, oblivious to the fact that I wasn't really listening anymore and had somewhere else I needed to be...20 minutes ago. I listen to books on my commute to fill my time and take my mind off of traffic, but I found myself sighing and not following the story, because quite honestly, in my opinion there isn't much of one. Granted, I didn't give the book a real chance, but after the first two hours, I felt no indication that it was going to get any better. It was almost out of politeness that I brought myself to flip to the third disk, but then I realized no one would ever know that I didn't finish this book unless I told them. So I didn't.

Rating:
Summary: Heartfelt
Review: Ms. Miller did a wonderful job putting together the story of her father's illness and how it became intertwined with her life. I used to work with Alzheimer's and dementia patients and saw how difficult it was for families, not to mention the person suffering. Many families fall apart because they can not make sense of what is happening to their parent, but it was encouraging to see someone stick by and care for their parent. I think this memoir accurately portrays the slow loss all people involved go through. Its a great book for caretakers and anyone touched by this disease.

Rating:
Summary: Heartfelt
Review: Ms. Miller did a wonderful job putting together the story of her father's illness and how it became intertwined with her life. I used to work with Alzheimer's and dementia patients and saw how difficult it was for families, not to mention the person suffering. Many families fall apart because they can not make sense of what is happening to their parent, but it was encouraging to see someone stick by and care for their parent. I think this memoir accurately portrays the slow loss all people involved go through. Its a great book for caretakers and anyone touched by this disease.

Rating:
Summary: An excellent writer tackles a problem many of us share
Review: Perhaps I am a bit jaded; my father-in-law is in the late stages of dementia, and over the years I have read many books written by relatives who watch over a loved one's decline into this disease.

What Sue Miller adds to this "genre" is the general excellence of her writing. (Miller is well-known as the author of novels such as "The Good Mother.") Thus, "The Story of My Father" rises above the sad story of her father's decline (a story whose outlines will be familiar to many of us) and gives us more, a touching portrait of the man her father was throughout his life.

I did not learn anything new about Alzheimer's from reading this book. But I think most of us read books like this not for the medical facts, but for the sense that we are not alone, that other people have been there, too. If that describes you well, you will find "The Story of My Father" a very sympathetic choice.




Rating:
Summary: Extraordinary gift
Review: Sue Miller has given us all the most extraordinary gift in the form of this wonderful memoir. My father was an Episcopal priest and although he died at an early age from leukemia, I could certainly relate to her tender descriptions of the relationship they had. The most important thing about the book is her careful description of the evolution over many years of the loving relationship she and her father had at the end. I could not decide whether to smile or cry throughout this book, but it is simply a gem. The factual information about AD is very important for all of us, but the intimate view she gives us of her own family life is truly a gift, an extraordinary gift, for which I am grateful.

Rating:
Summary: The Good Daughter
Review: Sue Miller has written a very thoughtful, loving account of her father's downward spiral with Alzheimer's disease. I found very informative her discussion of the history of the disease and the medical updates on it as described in Chapter 3.

As the title implies, there is more to this memoir than just an account of Ms. Miller's father's final days with Alzheimer's. She discusses much of her father's and her family's lives. The relationship of her parents, at least as she remembers it, was intriguing. I would like to have known either or both of her parents. Also, I bought the book from having read the first few pages in a local bookstore about James Nichols'-- the name of Ms. Miller's father-- feelings about pacificism. This is a brilliant first chapter that make you want to read more. Ms. Miller writes clear, beautiful prose.

Just as important as Mr. Nichols' story is also the story of Ms. Miller and her own frustrations, anger, love and all the other emotions that a child/caretaker feels as she watches the disintegration of a brilliant, scholarly and loving father. She attempts to be completely honest about her own feelings--it seems to be as honest as one can be in tackling such a painful and personal subject.

Mr. Nichols was lucky to have such a loving daughter. We, the readers, are likewise fortunate that she has written what had to be a very difficult book for her to write.

Rating:
Summary: A Must Have!
Review: Sue Miller's excellent work tells the heart wrenching story of an incredibly gifted man who gradually disappeared into the horrible disease that is Alzheimer's. Anyone who has a loved one who is suffering from this disease should read this book. I also recommend Into the Shadows by Dr. Robert F. DeHaan, a psychologist whose wife suffers from Alzheimer's, for those who want to read more. Both books address the loss of a loved one from a spiritual perspective.