Rating: 
Summary: MANY PSYCHOTHERAPY CLIENTS NEED THIS BOOK
Review: As a therapist, I have seen guilt ridden male clients open up and claim their change process after reading No More Mr. Nice. Guy. The level of guilt and shame imposed by our culture, which views men as bad and women as good, prevents many men from stepping into their lives, becoming successful, and not being manipulated by women. Therapists with such men as clients can find their work moving much faster once clients have read this book. I have had many who read it several times, with much underlining and high lighting.
Rating:
Summary: I had some questions answered by this book
Review: I have known for some time that many of the paradigms that I have grown up with and that I hold today weren't correct but never before have I found a book that offers such a complete explanation of why my ideas of how the world works are flawed. Dr. Glover offers a professional explanation of what is missing in so many men's lives today.
Rating:
Summary: Practical and accurate
Review: I have read books like Wild at Heart, but have not seen anything as practical and accurate as this book is. As a male Baby-Boomer born in 1957, I have often felt something was just not right in society. Now I have found another part of that explanation. This book also helped me see why many clergy organizations and local churches seem to be full of Nice Guys, but are not reaching or developing authentic men. For me this was a great book to read and I hope others will read it too.
Rating:
Summary: Finally
Review: I have struggled with many, many insecurities my whole life. The most problematic have caused me to never have a fulfilling relationship with a woman. This book has finally given me some insight into exactly what is wrong, where it came from, and most importantly... how to fix it. There are no overnight cures but at least now, I know what I need to do to start getting better. Only a few days after reading it, I can tell that my attitude is starting to change for the better. I have a long way to go and his website includes an online support group that has furthered the healing and will provide continued support. On the website, I have even been able to find a support group in town that I plan to attend.
Rating:
Summary: Why Being a Nice Guy is not necessarily ?nice.?
Review: I own both the PDF and the soft cover versions of the book. `Just glanced at the reviews as I was checking on the hard cover version. As is frequently the case when reading reviews of books you have read you wonder if some others have read the same book!Some of the misunderstanding, I suspect, comes from the concepts and definitions of "Nice Guy." If you define, "Nice Guy" as Dr. Glover does (and/or notices how he defines his terms) then you may be more inclined to understand and/or accept his hypothesis. In the years prior to my becoming aware of and acquiring Dr. Glover's book I paid particular interest to the Internet Newsgroup discussions of the "Nice Guy" vs. "The Jerk" in social relations (singles in particular) . Through at the very least several hundred if not one or two thousand messages I could see that the various comments and exchanges (some shall we say "heated") were closing in on "something." That something was not very clear, but the concept of a "Good Guy" vs. the "Nice Guy" started to emerge. I think what the discussion groups were coming close to hitting on is what Dr. Glover calls the "Integrated Man." Dr. Glover does not claim to have discovered some new psychological phenomenon as far as I can tell. Rather, he noticed, documented and analyzed the thoughts and behaviors of some the men in his practice. Having noticed a common thread of thoughts and behaviors which seem to be limiting the productivity and happiness of the men (and their families) he was dealing with he went about working on developing a means of describing the thought processes behind them and how to deal with them. If you substituted, "Man or Person engaged in thoughts and behaviors which self limit personal happiness and productivity" for "Nice Guy..." You might have a more properly descriptive title for the book (and a greater challenge fitting it on the cover). Through example and explanation of various clients Dr. Glover discusses the various beliefs he thinks drive certain "Nice Guy" behaviors like excessive self-sacrifice; giving with the hidden agenda (covert contracts as he calls them) of getting something; not taking responsibility for fulfilling your own needs like a responsible adult, etc. Some resistance to the book could very well be due to the title. After all, who would think "being nice" is not a good thing?? Perhaps another alternate title for the book could be "How to be an AUTHENTICALLY Nice Guy who is true to himself and the people around him." Once the operating concepts (or paradigms) of "Nice Guys" and their respective outward manifestations are identified; he goes about explaining how such thoughts and behaviors could have come about. Then he leads you through a series of exercises, distributed throughout the book, to help you overcome those self-limiting beliefs and behaviors. No More Mr. Nice Guy is not a perfect book. I quibble with some of the explanations or origins of some of the behaviors or beliefs he gives. The outward happiness and productivity limiting behaviors tend to be right on target however! At no point does he promise a "quick fix" or instant success. He does do an excellent job of providing insight and suggestions for improvement.
Many books can enhance your personal productivity and happiness. Which one or ones is/are right for you is almost totality dependent on your personal needs, experience, and current knowledge. Many books came before this one in my life. Another favorite is Play to Win by Wilson and Wilson. If a person (certainly not really limited to "guys") finds themselves searching for information to help understand their feeling and results in life (especially if you have been told many times you're a "Nice Guy") then No More Mr. Nice Guy is an EXCELLENT book to check out and compare to your own experience. I think you will find insight into parts of your life you may not have even thought to look into!
Rating:
Summary: Why Being a Nice Guy is not necessarily ¿nice.¿
Review: I own both the PDF and the soft cover versions of the book. 'Just glanced at the reviews as I was checking on the hard cover version. As is frequently the case when reading reviews of books you have read you wonder if some others have read the same book! Some of the misunderstanding, I suspect, comes from the concepts and definitions of "Nice Guy." If you define, "Nice Guy" as Dr. Glover does (and/or notices how he defines his terms) then you may be more inclined to understand and/or accept his hypothesis. In the years prior to my becoming aware of and acquiring Dr. Glover's book I paid particular interest to the Internet Newsgroup discussions of the "Nice Guy" vs. "The Jerk" in social relations (singles in particular) . Through at the very least several hundred if not one or two thousand messages I could see that the various comments and exchanges (some shall we say "heated") were closing in on "something." That something was not very clear, but the concept of a "Good Guy" vs. the "Nice Guy" started to emerge. I think what the discussion groups were coming close to hitting on is what Dr. Glover calls the "Integrated Man." Dr. Glover does not claim to have discovered some new psychological phenomenon as far as I can tell. Rather, he noticed, documented and analyzed the thoughts and behaviors of some the men in his practice. Having noticed a common thread of thoughts and behaviors which seem to be limiting the productivity and happiness of the men (and their families) he was dealing with he went about working on developing a means of describing the thought processes behind them and how to deal with them. If you substituted, "Man or Person engaged in thoughts and behaviors which self limit personal happiness and productivity" for "Nice Guy..." You might have a more properly descriptive title for the book (and a greater challenge fitting it on the cover). Through example and explanation of various clients Dr. Glover discusses the various beliefs he thinks drive certain "Nice Guy" behaviors like excessive self-sacrifice; giving with the hidden agenda (covert contracts as he calls them) of getting something; not taking responsibility for fulfilling your own needs like a responsible adult, etc. Some resistance to the book could very well be due to the title. After all, who would think "being nice" is not a good thing?? Perhaps another alternate title for the book could be "How to be an AUTHENTICALLY Nice Guy who is true to himself and the people around him." Once the operating concepts (or paradigms) of "Nice Guys" and their respective outward manifestations are identified; he goes about explaining how such thoughts and behaviors could have come about. Then he leads you through a series of exercises, distributed throughout the book, to help you overcome those self-limiting beliefs and behaviors. No More Mr. Nice Guy is not a perfect book. I quibble with some of the explanations or origins of some of the behaviors or beliefs he gives. The outward happiness and productivity limiting behaviors tend to be right on target however! At no point does he promise a "quick fix" or instant success. He does do an excellent job of providing insight and suggestions for improvement.
Many books can enhance your personal productivity and happiness. Which one or ones is/are right for you is almost totality dependent on your personal needs, experience, and current knowledge. Many books came before this one in my life. Another favorite is Play to Win by Wilson and Wilson. If a person (certainly not really limited to "guys") finds themselves searching for information to help understand their feeling and results in life (especially if you have been told many times you're a "Nice Guy") then No More Mr. Nice Guy is an EXCELLENT book to check out and compare to your own experience. I think you will find insight into parts of your life you may not have even thought to look into!
Rating: 
Summary: It's the only book like it out there
Review: I think the main premise of this book is sound. The cover is misleading, because it sounds like a guide to male selfishness. But it's not that at all. After reading it in one sitting I realized that a big group of guys, myself included, have lost a sense of who we are as males. The author is NOT telling us to stop being nice or kind; he's saying that we should find out who we really are and live true to that. He says we try to get approval all the time so that we'll get what we want, instead of forming relationships based on who we really are. We actually hide our true selves because we think we won't be accepted. Each man probably has a different reason why he's trying to be someone other than himself, and the author lists a whole bunch of reasons that you can check yourself against. Glover says that you should look at his list with your wife and work at it together. He is correct that wives don't like the "nice" husbands they're having to deal with, because these Nice Guys are really not that nice. He gives excellent sociological reasons why some men have become afraid of and detached from masculinity. The activities he gives for the reader to work through help a guy to see himself as he really is. In the end, he says, guys will be much better husbands to their wives, and more genuinely helpful and "nice," if they do everything with pure motives and complete honesty. If you've been trying to be nice in your marriage and your wife isn't buying it, and you want more sex, read this book!!!
Some of the concepts are explained up to three times. Repetition is a good learning tool, but I got a little tired of it. The chapter on masturbation doesn't sit well with me either. It seems unlikely to help in the way he describes. My guess is that it would perpetuate the kind of compartmentalizing that is so harmful in the minds of Nice Guys. I also felt that some of the other concepts would only work if you have a professional counselor helping you. Many of us are not that good at self-analysis.
Overall this is an excellent book for helping guys to stop trying to get approval through everything they do and stop trying to get sex from their wives by doing what they think is "nice."
Rating: 
Summary: Very Sad
Review: Look, nice is the cherry on top. When women get together and talk about their boyfriends and one woman says "my bf is an a__hole" the other women don't sigh and go "ohhhh you're so lucky". But if that woman went "oh he brings me flowers, he cooks for me, he tucks me in" guess what... other women sigh and go "I wish I had a guy like that". However, too many men confuse NICE with BORING. Dude, nice is great but nice + being able to carry on a conversation + not being an attention puppy + having a interesting job + an interesting range of friends is where it really IS at. Nice men do get the girl. But nice wall flowers don't. The only reason a__holes get the girl is because they actually try for her. As a woman friend said "if nice guys finish last it's only because they insist on the woman carrying them over the finish line." Okay you're very very good at self assessing yourself as "nice" but are you good at seriously assessing yourself as "interesting"? Do you wear a football jersey more than once a month? Do you only like hamburgers? C'mon ask yourself some basic questions. Great you gave a woman coworker flowers once and she didn't date you. Yeah I guess you have to be just a super nice guy and this is clear evidence that women don't date nice guys. And seriously, dudes, ask yourself how many plain Janes *you* chase because they're nice. If a bitchy porn actress said "right now buddy you and me" you'd probably have a hard time saying no. Why? Because you're getting it good in the sack! You think women are any different? Why do you expect women to over look facts like you're fat, you're ugly, you smell bad, you don't dress well, you're lazy, you're probably boring in bed all because, gosh, you're nice! Face it, dudes, we all want the same thing: we want someone who makes our knees weak, someone that makes our insides tingle. Nice is great but nice isn't the core of human attraction.
Rating:
Summary: A good book, by any standard.
Review: No More Mr. Nice Guy was the perfect book for me. As a former Nice Guy who was depressed and suicidal for many years, this book changed (and possibly saved) my life. A lot of it is not for everyone. The book very specifically it targets males who seek approval from others (mostly women) for all the wrong reasons, and seeks to help them overcome this unhealthy behavior. Part of the book describes common approval-seeking behaviors, part of it goes into the (mostly Freudian) psychology behind why the author thinks that some men behave this way, and part of the book gives exercises with which to help Nice Guys get over their problem and get what they want from life. There are plenty of real-men examples, too, to compare yourself against. One of the fundamental premises behind being a Nice Guy is that you feel that something is inherently wrong with you and your life and there is something that you must do or find or something out there that will make your life work somehow. If that describes the way you think, by all means buy this book. If not, you can still get some good use out of the common approval-seeking behaviors and psychology stuff. It's interesting to see how many people out there really do things for approval. The method to get over it works, if you can make yourself do it. It's not an easy thing to deal with. I know.
Rating:
Summary: Life-changing
Review: So far, reviewers aren't doing this book justice. I picked it up six months ago and was amazed at how well it described my plight as a "nice guy" (a.k.a. codependent). I've read stacks of self-help books, but this one stands above the rest. I mean it, it stands out, by far. And several guys I know who've read the book feel the same way. This book fully described what I've been going through, told me how things got to be this way, and gave me concrete steps on how to change things. Since I've read it, my life has improved, I feel better, more powerful, and people are responding to me in a new way. If you're a guy walking through life feeling frustrated that you don't get the love, respect, and sex you deserve, you owe it to yourself to read this book.
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