Rating: 
Summary: Much needed reality check
Review: I do not pretend to be an expert, or to have all the answers, but this book provides some much needed perspective on a seriously dysfunctional social trend. As a male, I was very happy to particiapte in the sexual revloution of the 70's in college and after college. As a brother, I have four sisters - sexually promiscuous in college and post college, all reasonably successful career women - all now in their 40's and 50's - and all but one childless (and that one twice divorced) and all miserable about their life situation - and all with low self esteem in this area. Further, their circle of professional peers tends towards the same description. The only good news about this is that they can't do enough for their neices and nephews - which is little compensation for the angst and despair that is a daily part of their lives - for the rest of their lives. Crittenden captures very neatly the fact that there is really nothing as scary to a man then to take a 30-something/40-something women out to dinner and find her eying him and his life more hungrily than the food. Crittenden says that feminism doesn't provide answers for the questions that distress young women, such as, "Is work really more important and fulfilling than raising my children?" and "Why does my boyfriend not want to get married as much as I do?" I think that modern women do not think this through nearly carefully enough. Eastern Europe, thanks to socialism, had "equality" in 1920. after 80 years of sex without guilt and responsibility, eastern european women seek western males in droves. Her argument that feminist fervor has failed modern women has merit, and her suggestions for how women can recapture meaning, fulfillment and happiness are worth discussing. Because of the realities of biology - a women's choices are overwhelmingly important to her future and it is a disservce to pretend that it isn't.
Rating: 
Summary: Nice work if you can get it... few women can
Review: I approached this book with an open, even receptive mind, having put my own career aside to make my children and husband my primary responsibility some years before Danielle Crittenden did. Her doggedly prescriptive do-as-I-say message doesn't wear well in the face of the discouraging economic "facts of survival" for the great majority of modern women. Having read many of "Miss" Crittenden's essays (and even one by her own mother) published when she was editor of The Women's Quarterly, published by the Scaife Foundation-funded Independent Women's Forum, it is abundantly clear that her once-divorced mother DID tell her: Marry young, and it's as easy to fall in love with an immensely wealthy man, as Danielle did, as a poor man whose single income could not support the family in the plush surroundings she enjoys.In addition, the author skipped university and went straight into newspaper writing (no doubt helped along by her newspaper-publisher stepfather and her writer-mother's contacts). Writing is a popular but not particularly well-paying field for women and men who want to fit their career around home responsibilities. To refer to herself primarily as an at-home mother is a canard for a frequent television presence with plenty of household help; Crittenden defensively insisted to Vanity Fair magazine that she wrote this book while her two then-preschool-age children "were at school" or "napping." Hell-o? Crittenden should not, as she does time and again, generalize to the struggling public from the basis of her own privileged and limited life experience, and that of her similarly posh friends. I am especially dismayed by the thought of young women who, after reading Crittenden, Shalit, etc., may feel guilty from the joy they take in their budding careers, and who may feel pressured to marry some schmo simply because Crittenden thinks the early twenties is the "ideal" age to marry, or face dire, lonely consequences. Coming in the spring of 2003 is "AmandaBright@home," the "novel" that Crittenden serialized in the Wall Street Journal. This is a peculiar sermonette. Her occasional trenchant remarks about the oddities of the Washington machinations among the power elite are neutralized by her basic ignorance of inside-the-Beltway "regular folks" life, as well as its obvious and preachy story line. (Extramarital affairs lead inexorably to heartache, folks; sex with your husband is something the cross off the "to-do" list, and the happy ending is... another baby. Hey, that's deep!) Given that her husband, David Frum, is a powerful figure in neocon publishing, this book will get a much bigger publicity push than other first novels. Beware: if you thought "What Our Mothers Didn't Tell Us" was an unrealistic trifle, well, avoid "AmandaBright@CNN"--excuse me, "@Home"--unless you enjoy throwing books at the walls.
Rating:
Summary: Do as I say, not as I do
Review: The author claims that the path of female happiness is husband, children and home-making, while she herself doesn't seem to notice that she is a working mother. The benefits of achievement, accomplishment and economic independence she's chosen for herself are exactly what she's teaching other women to deny for themselves. There's not one path to happiness for all women; neither is the choice simply 50s-style family life or male-modeled power success. Instead of this book, try books by Harriet Lerner or "Love, Honor and Negotiate" by Betty Carter for a more balanced view of attaining happiness, fulfillment and intimacy.
Rating:
Summary: Recycled backlash tripe...
Review: Same recycled backlash trip borrowed from the 1980's backlash anti-feminist books. Same old ideas lifted from other backlash eras claiming that working moms "shortchange" their kids & that the only narrow perscription for happiness for women is getting married early & having kids young and resigning yourself to a life of being a housewife. She blatantly insults women's intelligence by implying that women "followed" some small band of leaders and were "duped" into thinking, God forbid, of any other choices besides the same tired, hackneyed "choice" pushed on women in the fifties. She also insults working moms by painting a rosy picture of the virtuous young housewife who "gave it all up" to be a "perfect" mother to her kids, implying that working moms don't love or care for their kids...the same guttersnipe lifted right from the eighties backlash era, almost plagiarously. The book's only good for a few laughs, but don't be duped by the message; most women I know, who are mostly working moms are happy and have well-adjusted happy kids who turn out well.
Rating:
Summary: This book is long overdue!!
Review: I thought this book was very well written and spot on and hope many women read this book and are more aware of the issues it raises when they are young enough to do something about them. Women should not feel ashamed for wanting to become mothers but should be equally supported whether or not they choose a career and whether or not they choose marriage and children in the first place. One criticism of the book is that Ms Crittenden does viciously attack women who have chosen not to have children as having empty lives and I truly wonder if, in some instances, this is really the case?... On the other hand, if I had not been lucky enough to have met my husband when I did, how would I feel reading this book? Whilst I know many women who have "played away" their valuable 20s, many haven't and just haven't met decent men. This is the one aspect of the whole post-feminist era that Ms Crittenden fails to address and I would be a very bitter woman indeed if I fell into this category. ...I feel very sad for any woman who has been swept along by the post-feminist train of thought that women must behave exactly like men to be considered equal to them, without any regard for biology. We are different to men - and vive la difference!
Rating:
Summary: Validation
Review: This book was refreshing, honest, and to-the-point. The author unabashedly reveals the lies of feminism and its abuse of women.
Rating:
Summary: Don't Fall Victim to Crittenden's Social Constructivist View
Review: I feel sorry for any woman who reads this book with any serious consideration. Her perspective is personal, biased, and completely shaped by society's "norms" and cultural family myths. Instead of looking at things from a perspective of REALITY, she completely disregards every possibility for a non-traditional family, which has every chance of being successful as society's "normal" one does, and instead makes the minority feel as if they are inferior. Either Crittenden is an in-the-closet lesbian, or a relatively unattractive woman to think she can mold the world into her litlte narrow-minded view. Granted, there are several women who were happy in the marriages of the '50's, and I'm not about to take that away from anyone who wants to live the cute little housewife/submissive to husband/white picket fence/raising beautiful white straight children life. Live and let live. Don't try to define a word that is in actuality the most ambiguous, undefinable word in the English language - family. Don't fall victim to Crittenden's social constructivist views. The life she describes works for her. That's wonderful. Think about what makes you happy instead.
Rating:
Summary: A Must-read for every female aged 16 and beyond.
Review: This enlightening book exposes the truths about life as a woman, truths that we have shoved aside for too long. It encourages women to think about what they want early in life, and helps them to focus on fulfilling their dreams in a purposeful way, rather than burying themselves in their "single" lives, and then complaining that they can't find love. A happy marriage and family is built by making conscious decisions, and recognizing a good marriage partner when you meet one. So many single young women turn away from the one man who respects them, loves them, and will make an excellent, dependable husband in favor of the "exciting" one, only to find themselves wishing later that they didnt let him get away. As Danielle C. cites, many women today profess that they are too "selfish" to have children in their 20's, and plan to wait until they are in their late 30's. What will be different then? They will only be more entrenched in their careers and lifestyles, and it will be only harder to change everything and have children. Reading this book as a young person will bring to light many important things that usually are only learned through time and life experience. Be happy to have the opportunity to hear it first, while just beginning life after highschool.
Rating:
Summary: Right on the money
Review: Every sentence in this book hits the nail right on the head. I swear, I am going to write Danielle a letter one of these days and tell her what a genius she is.
Rating:
Summary: An eye-opener
Review: I read "return to modesty" in the past, which is good as well, but this one does not only focus on young women still dreaming of the knight on a white horse. It is an interesting glimpse of the situation of American families after the sexual/feminist revolution. Most of the time it is scary and sad but it confirms that people living with true/natural values are the happiest.
|
