Rating: 
Summary: Don't lose sight of what's important
Review: I was fighting with my wife and just happened to pick up and read a copy of the book. I was struck by the stupidity of the argument, the win-lose proposition that would end up lose-lose as they always do, so decided to stop and listen. One passage struck me, "the men who will be successful will trust their own intuition and be smart enough to listen to the women around them", another way to appreciate women rather than ignoring or pushing them away. I was afraid the book would be bordering on the pop psych drivel and was pleasantly surprised to see lots of stuff I could relate to.
Rating: 
Summary: An essential guide about middle-aged men for both sexes
Review: Ms. Sheehy has done it again: she has written a book both supported by research and as interesting a read as any novel. My only problem with this book is that most of the "case histories" are about men who have the financial advantage necessary to give them the freedom to take the time to dabble in this or that while they are trying to discover how they want to spend their Second Adulthood, as Sheehy calls the years after age 50. Most of the men in Sheehy's book are definitely NOT fast food restraunt managers, security guards, or factory shift workers, etc. Men at this lower end of the income scale simply cannot afford to take 18 months (a figure estimated in the book) off from any kind of gainful employment after becoming the laid-off victims of downsizing. Still, the book puts forth a lot of helpful information for both men and the women who interact with them.
Rating:
Summary: Read this book if you are ready to face the music.
Review: Reading this book is a necessary gut-wrenching experience. Nobody likes to hear exactly the idiotic things we men sometimes do. Especially from a woman...right guys?Sheey is right on the money. You will find your father, brother, GRANDFATHER and buddies all here. As well as yourself. And *that* is the gem this book will leave behind: finding yourself, situating your thoughts and realizing that you are not all that crazy..that, yes, you can stay in the saddle or get back on it. You are hardly alone. Two comments: One, don't take the age ranges literally (Sheely advises the same thing). Two, enjoy the book while it lasts, because "the meaning of life" is not described at the end of the book. The book reads like a novel at some points, BUT it is not. If you get to the end and are still clueless. Put it down and think hard. You will get IT. Read it. You will be glad you did.
Rating: 
Summary: Book's real title - a woman's idea of men's passages
Review: Reading this book is like reading a book on India written by a Chinese author who happens to be married to an Indian and who has interviewed 100 Indians. The book is written by a woman with, what looks to be, a strong desire to change men in a way which benefits feminist thinking. A woman, who has written about women's passages, thinking that she is now qualified to write about men's passages, is deliberately ignoring the basic fact that you have to live a particular type of life in order to write about it. No - being a man's wife and interviewing 100 men does not qualify you for that position. Here's an example from this book (page 159) - ""One of the unremarked revolutions of the last two decades has been the increase in professional women who find divorce a springboard and choose (italics) to remain single. Thus, a man who loses his job in middle life and who may never get back onto the same footing with his career - or chooses not to try - stands to lose his marriage as well if the couple does not find help getting through this transition. This can be a devastating loss."" It is beyond my "manly" comprehension that how can a divorce be a woman's springboard and a man's devastation. Don't look for any advice in this book on how can a divorce be a man's springboard also. Don't look for any advice or guidance in this book on how men can stand on their own or how they can also choose (italics) to remain single. Also don't look into this book for any ideas about how men should push to change the legal system to balance legally enforceable women's rights like community property, alimony, child support with men's rights which should also be legally enforceable. After all when a man proposes "Will you marry me ?" he does have some rights in his mind - doesn't he - or he is just itching to give away half his paycheck, and then his kids and child support payments to someone. Again - don't look for any discussion of this kind in this book.
Rating:
Summary: A must read for man and his mate.
Review: Sheehy brings insight to perspective via interviews and observations about man's tormentuous passage through life. Bingo. She hits it on the head! Sure helped me better understand both my internal and external tribulations. As usual, it's great to know that others are in the same boat - some sinking faster than others. Bravo work which should help this generation and others to understand their passages and better deal with them.
Rating:
Summary: Like looking into life's mirror.
Review: Sheehy has touched a nerve in me. I feel she truly knows and even better, understands, what men are going through at 50. It was nice to know that someone is listening to men and her advise for our future couldn't be more apropo. When my grandchildren ask me " what I did to make the world a better place", I won't answer, "I made money." Thanks Gail
Rating: 
Summary: New Age Meets Middle Age and New Age Wins!
Review: This book concludes that men should do the work they enjoy in order to be happy and live longer lives, and that traditional masculinity is a self-destructive and literal dead end. The better sections of this book examine the changing roles that men fill as they move from youth through middle age and into old age, as well as the physiological changes that take place during this aging. The aging process has milestones for men no less certain and traumatic for men as well as women. The revolution in health is permitting men to live longer and higher quality lives between retirement (forced or otherwise) and death. The need to explore how better to use that time beyond golf and greed is certainly appropriate and Sheehy provides a starting point for that discussion. The problem is that much of the psychology is old wine in a new bottle. Once upon a time older men were respected for their experience simply by virtue of having survived. Traditional family values, if faithfully followed, already give men a secure base which respects a man for what he IS rather than what he HAS. And finally, the pursuit of excellence, virtue in the classic sense, as an organizing principle in a man's life, is virtually dismissed in a paragraph except to arise much later in the book as a comment that artists and symphony conductors seem to have long and fulfilling lives. The author overlooks that for one who is in a calling instead of job, that joy of a job well done can exist for a production technician as well as a painter.
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Summary: Understanding Men's Passages is Great!
Review: This is a resonating adventure into how men think & speak of their lives as they reach their middle years & watch their passions wane, pressures intensify & relationships fade. Originating with the author's observations of her husband's struggle into & out of his male menopause crisis, Gail Sheehy set about interviewing hundreds of men & recorded their thoughts. Interspersed are statistics, poems & quotes. There is a thorough Resource Guide together with exercises & strategies. Definite fodder for the grey cells & would make a loving gift!
Rating:
Summary: This book is an embarssment
Review: This is a terrible book. Poor research, bad writing and oversimplified thinking all combine to produce a book that no one should read. Sheehy should move on to another subject if not another career. I highly recommend that you do NOT WASTE YOUR TIME with this drivel. I am angry I wasted mine.
Rating:
Summary: Three stars is generous . . .
Review: This isn't an awful or poorly written book, but it really seemed skin-deep to me (42yo male). The author skimmed the topics, even though she apparently interviewed a lot of men. It just isn't deep at all -- to me, it was like watching a television show. By comparison, "Iron John" by Robert Bly was very deep and thoughtful. Years after I read that book, I'm still thinking over some of what he said.
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