Rating: 
Summary: poor women who need those rules
Review: A friend of mine received this book as a fun birthday present from a friend who is presently in the U.S. (we are German), and we started to read it...Well! It was not really possible for us to seriously review this book as the mental and emotional reality of its authors as well as of the readers it seems to aim at is completely beyond ours. Basically, neither self-knowledge nor personal exchange nor interest in the world nor creative fulfilment nor anything understandable to us seems to be the foundation of this concept of living, but merely the acquisition of a man as husband...and to what purpose? Even if that project is successful, the wife has to struggle all the time (i.e. to follow those rules) to keep up his interest - which basically means (in spite of the frequent assurances of "uniqueness" and powers to fascinate) that no woman being herself is truly lovable and able to enter and keep up fulfilling relationships...I am sure that a lot of women know from experience that this is just untrue, and that even the inner freedom and authenticity with which you can contact other people not only nourishes your own confidence but also is exactly that bond that connects you to those other people...in other words: that bond which is completely missing of you go about scheming and following rules...As you can gather, my friend and I got rather angry at that book. Pity is that it will probably fascinate women with unhappy love experiences and fool them into believing that emotional relations can be controlled that way. Still, I rated it at 3...who knows? There may be worse books (at least spelling and grammar were unobtrusive).
Rating: 
Summary: Crap, but could be interesting reading
Review: I skimmed through this book out of curiousity. As a male, I find the advice to be mediocre. For one thing, it says that women should rarely return men's calls; what kind of men will keep interest in someone who doesn't return their calls? Desperate ones, and players. Overall, this book may get you a man, but if you want anyone worth keeping, try being yourself.
Rating: 
Summary: Hate - Love Relationship
Review: I admit it! I hated this book when my girlfriend first told me about it. I thought it was pathetically manipulative and there is way too much of that going around these days! Now, I love it. Why the change of heart? It was simple. I asked myself how successful I had been with finding a lasting loving and joyful relationship. Well, not well at all frankly. I decided to follow, all the rules, no deviation. However, intention is very important. Sure you can follow these suggestions with manipulative intent and then I think it backfires. However, be honest and true to the spirit of things like "pursuit" and receptivity and enjoy the journey. What's fun is there's respect and playfulness not manipulation, it's really up to us to apply this paint!
Rating: 
Summary: Surprisingly wise!
Review: After hearing of this book as advocating manipulation and trickery I decided to read it. When I first skimmed through it, I was pretty shocked but after reading it through CAREFULLY I was fascinated in spite of myself. The main premise behind The Rules is that human beings don't tend to value what is easily obtained. Hence, "play hard to get", to weed out those who are REALLY not interested. The book explicitly advocates not telling lies (although the authors do suggest asking a woman's mother or roommate to inform a potential suitor that she's not home, even though she may be). An interesting point (at least to me) is that once on a date with the guy, we are advised to be easy to be with i.e. to be "light and breezy". I always had the impression that "hard to get" involved being cool and standoffish. The authors are firm on the issue of NOT treating a guy like a therapist or a girlfriend. This seems to be the issue generating the most amount of controversy, i.e. whether being easy to be with amounts to fakery. The authors specifically state not to hide any important details of one's past by the time the couple is engaged. I guess this is what makes the book so fascinating, it delicately straddles the fence between old-world feminine wiles and modern forthrightness. What I like most about the book, however is the injunction to "be a creature unlike any other" and the stress it places on high self-respect. Seeming needy, clingy and anxious is to be avoided at all costs. By not seeming desperate to get a date, you will get one! The most serious objection I have to this book is that the authors are glibly convinced that following The Rules can deter domestic violence. This is blaming the victim, saying in effect that non-Rules behavior could somehow elicit abuse. If the book did not contain this piece of "advice" I would rate it a 10.
Rating:
Summary: Useful counterintellingence, but that's it
Review: Men might find this worth reading to see when the Rules ploy is being used against them and steer clear. I doubt this will work for many women, though. The Rules is based on the assumption that men love games and puzzles and will therefore enjoy a woman who plays hard to get. Sorry, but I solve enough puzzles at work as a software developer. Dating is already enough of a puzzle, thank you. It doesn't need to be harder. Not all the advice is bad, but the overall idea is. If you don't act interested, most men (including myself) will assume you're not interested and move on. Contrary to the authors' belief, I don't want what I can't have, nor I am interested in pestering someone who says they aren't interested. Why be a stalker?
Rating: 
Summary: Oh...PLEASE...
Review: A waste of time & money...this book will only tell you how to chase good men away and end up with jerks. I feel sorry for the husband/boyfriend's (if they have any)of these two very emotionally disturbed so-called "writers", who have a very distorted view of reality.
Rating:
Summary: The Rules work with one view in mind: marriage
Review: When I started The Rules I was deeply offended. As a feminist, later a femininist (one who nurtures and accepts her femininity), a financially independent woman with one marriage behind her and plenty of dates available any time I want, I came to see that The Rules are a sophmoric cure-all so typical to Americans who desperately seek guidance in everything they do. From diagnostic labels on milk cartons to over-the-top health regimes, the same instructional step-by-step analysis applies to landing a husband. Am I so bereft of spiritual aliveness that I have to follow a set of dogmatic rules thought I? I was no longer offended, as this thinking confirmed the very reasons why I left Ameica in the first place. There is no accounting for the shades of personality, the tremendous wealth of sexual expression nor of identification with persons who fit into your own mental, spiritual and emotional universe in this book. By categorically limiting woman and men into two groups: hunted and hunters, these lay authoress' strip humans of their essential beings. For some women this book may work. It doesn't for me.
Rating:
Summary: The Rules and The Code - a great combo
Review: "The Rules" and "The Code" are most definitely two of the funniest books on relationships in the marketplace today. Anyone within a mature and relaxed frame of mind will probably have the time of his life reading them. Personally, I liked the discouraging answers to "Do I look fat?" best. "Where are the other two tenors?" had me rolling on the floor and laughing. As always, there are several layers to each of these books. On the surface, they appear humorous to most adults - they ignore the fact that different people have different personalities, that putting up a facade will only result in your partner loving a facade instead of you as a person and that following a pattern of behaviour obviously strongly favours certain (not necessarily desirable) classes of potential partners. Breaking the eggshell of superficiality, many positive aspects of both these books may be found. Like any religion, The Code and The Rules each form an amusing mix of vital guidelines or essence (Respect yourself etc.), and sticky, gooey nonsense. It is usually the nonsense that captures the disciples' minds. Interestingly enough, both volumes seem to have found a following outside Salt Lake City. Which only proves mankinds general capacity to believe. Advancing even further, the young chicken's heartbeat becomes audible. The ancient Chinese author Sun Tzu once wrote: "Know the enemy." A general knowledge of tactics is invaluable, be it to play by them and win somebody on their terms or to recognize and evade suchlike mind-games early on. Both these books contain interesting information on tendencies of behaviour of the opposite sex. Different goals - be they short-term or long-term, profound or shallow - demand different actions. Remember: knowledge is power, but your behaviour reflects your ethics.
Rating:
Summary: Good basic premise, bad way of communicating the tactics
Review: I think that the base thought of the book is for women to become respectful enough of themselves to do the choosing of who they are going to marry instead of waiting to be chosen. and settling for whatever comes along. Women do need to raise the bar in their expectations of what type of man they will accept and one who is late all the time, or doesn't call, or doesn't cherish you is unacceptable. That I think is valid. However, lying and "tricking" is not. If you don't have plans, don't tell him that you do. That is disrespectful to him and makes you look like a loon if he finds out. Tell him that you have plans to stay home tonight, that you would like to see him, could you take a raincheck. Let him know that when he is consistently late (or late at all without calling), or when he never asks you out until the last minute that it makes you feel unimportant and it is not acceptable in the type of man that you want for your life. Being honest is good, being honest and taking care of yourself is great. I would HIGHLY recommend a book by Dr. Laura Schlesinger "Ten stupid things women do to mess up their lives" The title is a bit harsh but the content is invaluable in teaching women how to respect themselves AND their potential mate at the same time.
Rating:
Summary: My best friend loves it - I'm not so sure
Review: My mum sent me a magazine article about the Rules telling me not to take it too seriously (but obviously hoping I would). I sent it to a friend who had recently found out her long term partner of four years had been cheating on her for two. She bought the book and it turned her world around because she WAS one of those women whose whole life revolved around her man. She learned a lot from seeing how the fact that she was at his beck and call and forgave him for every misdemeanor allowed him to treat her very badly indeed. She tells me that she thinks I already am a Rules woman because I only see my boyfriend at the week-end and I don't sit around waiting for him to call. That is because I am too busy, and I like it fine that way. I think the book could be dangerous if followed to the letter. You would probably end up married to a real old fashioned guy who expected his dinner on the table when he got in from work every night, but I guess that is what some girls want. I think The Rules should be taken with a pinch of salt, but could be a real help to women who get treated poorly because they love those bad boys too much.
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