Rating: 
Summary: I'll pass my copy to my daughter...
Review: This is a book that you'll either love or hate. However, all the facts in the books are very true. If you cannot agree with them, my guess is you either don't have enough experience with men or you don't want to face the reality. Anyway, let me tell you my story. I read "The Rules" 3 years ago, just couple months before I met my Mr. Right. Although it was very tempting to break the rules, I tried my best to practice them on him. And exactly 1 year after we met, he proposed. I am so glad that I've found this book and thanks to the authors, I'm now happily married!! I have bought "the rules" for all my girlfriends and I am keeping my copy for my daughter...
Rating: 
Summary: An Affront to Intelligence and Individuality
Review: This book shows little respect for the intellect and individuality of either gender. It IS everything the authors try to claim it is not - manipulation, game-playing, cruelty, being inconsiderate, ad infinitum.The book advises (and repetitively reminds) women that they are "a creature unlike any other" even if they are marriage-obsessed couch potatoes desperate to find a husband and produce offspring. If you're sitting watching TV Friday night, don't turn the answering machine off to make men think you have a life - DO something! Go dancing, paint a picture, anything! While witholding information and being elusive may make you *appear* more elusive on the basis of the scarcity principle and may intensify feelings, they WON'T make him fall in love with the "real you". If there's so little of interest about you that you feel the need to resort to the authors' variety of manipulation, ignore their advice, spend some time on self-development, and become more interesting by learning and doing things. A rusted-out '78 Caprice is still a rusted-out '78 Caprice no matter how much body putty and fresh paint you put on it. Not returning a man's calls, limiting phone time to ten minutes, never meeting him halfway, training him to call early in the week... PLEASE! These *are* inconsiderate and manipulative. The goal of a Rules Girl is to avoid getting hurt emotionally - sure, because she's creating emotional stress by creating hoops for a man to jump through. News flash- if you love someone you DON'T try to make their life difficult. Amusingly, the authors justify such double standards by saying you're not cruel, you're doing him a "favor" by creating longing (as opposed to not wasting his time and letting him find a woman he actually connects with instead of one trying to reel a man in?), that if he's ANGRY it's GOOD because it shows interest (maybe it means you're making his life [bad]?). Need I go on? Then they go so far as to say NOT to read books that disagree or tell your therapist because then you might not follow through with The Rules. (with a Capital R, like "God" vs "god" for added authority!) Afraid your silly little book won't stand up to rational scrutiny? Very dogmatic; apparently the authors are FAR more intelligent than any of their readers, who must follow, lamb-like, if they're ever to enjoy happiness in life. Excellent use of commitment and consistency; commit to something, decide it's what you believe, close your mind to all else, and you WILL be more likely to live it - but if you have at least two active brain cells, is this REALLY how you want to live? The book also COMPLETELY fails to take personality types into account. It's written for the stereotypical ESFJ woman (the 1950's stereotype in search of the house, white picket fence, etc) and stereotypical ESTJ (or ESTP if she "trains" him well enough) man. Intuitive types, especially perceiving ones, and introverted males will take offense at the tactics described. I personally wouldn't waste my time with a woman who pulled the stunts described in this book. Communication, understanding, and a shared vision are much more important than stupid, coquettish games. If you want to snag a hubby quickly but aren't concerned about true quality, this book may help - though many men would rather you told them about your wedding-obsession up front and scared them off. (The book also treats wedding-obsession, fantasizing about it, planning it, naming the kids, etc as if they were NORMAL, HEALTHY behaviors!!!!) Scary. Very scary. If you're male, go ahead and read this book for entertainment; you'll laugh at how ridiculous most of it is and learn to spot and avoid "Rules Girls". If you're female - don't corrupt your mind with it, or at least think critically and take its advice with a VERY large grain of salt.
Rating:
Summary: Men Do Not Like These Rules
Review: Imagine for one moment that a man does this to you: He doesn't return your phone calls, he acts aloof when you are trying to get his attention, he doesn't talk much during the date, he seems disinterested in you while on the date and he lets you do all the talking. How would all that make you feel??? So why would you do that to him?! Men do not like these rules, for good reason. They want and likes women to show their interest in them. Your interest makes them feel attractive and wanted. They have been saying that for years. All the things men like from you cannot be found in these rules. The only thing I liked about this book is that it tells you not to jump into a relationship so fast, and especially not to jump into the sack with him so fast. Other than that, there's nothing here that men will agree on. What they want and like from you is what counts, not what other women think they want. Here's one thing these authors haven't thought of: Many men are like children, wanting that toy. The more it is denied him, the more he will want it. The same with women. The more you play hard to get, the more he will want you, but it doesn't necessarily mean he wants that serious relationship. He just wants you because he can't have you. What's going to happen if he does get you? What does a child do with a toy after playing with it for so long? That's right Crude analogy? Yes. But that's the way many men are. The Rules gives advice that will backfire in your face. Read the Real Rules, by Barbara DeAngelis instead. That's what wil work with men. Perry Rose Author of I Love You...Will You Marry Me?!
Rating: 
Summary: Millennium Reality
Review: Contrast the Rules with Nita Tucker's How Not to Stay Single, which I find a much wiser book. Ms. Tucker writes in the chapter about rejection, "If they're not interested, they won't tell you directly. They'll tell you the same way you tell other people -- by not making time." By her book, the Rules are actually polite rejections! So are the Rules really wise screening-in, or foolish screen-out? Put it this way, if the man who wants to date you is confident, competent, loving, romantic, other women would like him, too. He might not get to the 4th phonecall before moving on towards someone who does show interest and return calls.
Rating:
Summary: Hypocrisy? Nonsense!
Review: I have been happily married for 25 years. I recently read "The Rules" and was amazed, first because these ideas, which are just common sense, are new to anybody, and second, because this book has caused so much controversy....
Rating:
Summary: A fine bargain
Review: Millions of single women who have made this book an international bestseller have one ambition in common - not only they want to be married, but married well. Of course, wealth is a relative term; however, it would be reasonable to assume that a man who can afford a 'lavish' treatment for his lady is ...loaded. A man like that is probably a professional of some kind, has worked very hard to get where he is and appreciates a woman who presents him with no emotional or personal problems but always looks good in bikini. All he has to do is to spend a lot of money on her - which is not difficult since he has it, and that buys her compliance. The 'fembots' like this do exist, and they do enjoy their good fortune ( for a while - ditto miss Fein's divorce). What man would not marry somebody who makes it her 'job' to keep him, never allows herself to relax and always takes a defensive position? This is not a relashionship, this is a war and ... you are sleeping with your enemy! The 'happiness' bought with submission is a fine bargain if you are willing to pay the costs. But is this woman - you?
Rating:
Summary: Old-fashioned, commonsense advise
Review: There's a lot of conflicting advice here about this book, so let me start off by saying this: There is some silly stuff in here, but it's worth slogging through the bits about "Use an egg timer to limit your phone calls" and "Rules girls never get divorces" to get to the good stuff. (And my condolences to Ellen Fein about her divorce. She is a truly nice and knowledgeable woman.) The authors concentrate on the principle that men like to pursue women, rather than be pursued. Sure, guys are -flattered- to be pursued, but they often don't value what comes to them too easily. This is the basis for the rest of the book: Don't chase after men, don't call them, don't sleep with them too quickly, etc. Basically, this is the sort of advice your grandma would give you. It doesn't involve mindgames or any sort of manipulation. The authors never encourage you to lie, just to remain mysterious and not tell a man your entire schedule or life story on the first date. The authors encourage you to fill up your life with things that keep you from obsessing about men -- going to the gym, joining clubs, volunteering, etc. Some people say they encourage you to fake confidence and independence, but I disagree. I think they only encourage you to fake it until you develop those qualities on your own. (I have found this absolutely happens -- like when you start feeling happier if you force yourself to smile.) I have found that when I follow the guidelines in the book, I end up in much happier and more secure relationships. They tend to attract men who are very chivalrous and somewhat old-fashioned. If that's not what you like, then this book may not be for you. They definitely weed out guys who don't make a lot of effort to be with you -- as well as the ones who are primarily interested in sex. In my current relationship, I have used "The Rules" consistently, with excellent results. My boyfriend -- who pursued me -- is sweet, thoughtful and gentlemanly. He calls me several times a week (I very rarely call him), and he always picks me up at my house for our dates. He loves taking me to dinner, movies, plays, festivals, etc. and always tells me how much he enjoys the chance to "be a gentleman" when we're together. If yu're considering buying this book, I recommend it. Even if you disagree with some of the advice here, there's still plenty of good stuff.
Rating:
Summary: Wow, I'm floored.
Review: If you're like me, you constantly have guys all over you wanting to get to know you better. I found it very hard to weed out those that just wanted me because my pants fut tight -- that is, until I found this book. When I read it, a wonderful feeling came over me. It was so simple... never show a guy that you are interested, look into his eyes, or return calls. Reverse psychology! My life has been so much easier since reading this book. I'm a strict Rules girl now :) I haven't had a date in 2 years, but I know that's because all those guys just want my body and not my mind. I know that Mr. Right will jump through 1000 hoops to land a date with me, because he will do it because he loves me. I'll just keep on acting like I'm not interested and hide my true feelings to lure him in! LOL! Let's get real here. Ask yourself how you react to someone that shows no interest, or won't return calls. If you're sane, you move on and find someone who is interested. The best way to find someone is to be yourself. Follow your feelings, and use common-sense. Don't read this junk.
Rating:
Summary: Common Sense???
Review: Isn't this book about common sense? What is so special about this? Why is Ellen Fein getting divorced? Her own book did not apply to her marriage?
Rating:
Summary: Not What It Seems
Review: This book, like their advice is useless, unless you're a woman who can't think for herself. Maybe if Ellen Fein had spent more time working on her marriage instead of her publications, and practiced what she preaches (but obviously does not know of what she speaks) her marriage would still be in tact. On Oprah Winfrey's television show in 1996, Fein told a feminist critc whose first marriage had failed, that as a divorcee, she was in no position to pontificate. I guess that quote came back to bite her in the but.
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