Rating: 
Summary: Why I recommend The Rules to my single gal pals...
Review: I read THE RULES about 5 years ago when I was dating, upon the advice of several friends who were tired, bored, and frustrated with my breathless tales of relationships gone awry. Now I recommend the book to single female friends in search of a devoted, loyal mate.Yes, the book offends politically-correct notions of feminine liberation, suggesting that women play coy games to trap guileless males who can't read bestsellers like THE RULES themselves. But beneath the facially dated advice is wisdom based on science. I recently suggested that a gal pal read the book when she complained of feeling insecure with her current date. She's a powerful, intelligent woman who enjoys her independence...but feels a lot of competition in the mate market. I'm not sure she will read THE RULES, but she suggested that I share my perspective with prospective book buyers: "If THE RULES and social biologists are correct, that men are driven to select women they've pursued, then what is it that women need? In a word--SECURITY. We need a man whom we trust will RETURN TO THE NEST, THE CAVE, AFTER HE GOES OUT TO HUNT FOOD. A man who will come home! We need a provider of SECURITY. It's as much psychological as physical these days, of course, with women being pretty self-sufficient. But I think we still want to FEEL that our man TREASURES us, his home, enough to always want to come back. We want to KNOW his loyalty and devotion to US. And that's where THE RULES fit science. Not only do you want and deserve a mate who thinks you are THE BEST, HIS QUEEN, etc....but you NEED that....to feel secure. It's not just an individual's personal insecurity that enters courtship. If the guy isn't communicating his devotion to you by letting you know that YOU ARE INCREDIBLY SPECIAL TO HIM in a UNIQUE way, then you will inevitably suspect he'll wander on his hunt. that's just our biology. We NEED a man who is devoted to US. And allegedly men PRIZE the women they think they CAUGHT after a PURSUIT. The kind of "mysterious creature" described in THE RULES. So it's not a one-way trick where a woman gives up her integrity to play stupid games to trap a man. It's the way women find a man who will RECOGNIZE us as the ONE person worthy of his special appreciation...and devotion. So we can lose the damn insecurity we feel as females. ...course, we all know now that women can be quite happy WITHOUT men, too. They need us a lot more than we need them. Remember that, too! ; ) "
Rating: 
Summary: It's still a classic
Review: I love this book! I have read it 4 times in the past 5 years! Every woman should read it at least once.
Rating:
Summary: Not just for wonen
Review: Single gay men, this is a great chance to learn from our women friends about snagging men. A friend followed "The Rules", and the man of his dreams fell in love with him. After passing the book on to me, I've been employing these tactics for years to keep a man in every port. You can do it too. Learn the subtle nuances to playing hard-to-get, and discover how to keep men pursuing you. Feign disinterest, and watch them shower you with gifts. I wholeheartedly reccommend you study this book so when Mr. Right appears, you know how to act to keep him coming back for more.
Rating: 
Summary: deceptive
Review: It works, you go through the system, follow each rule, and as the authors say, you don't break any, at all. you may then turn into a really passive creature, forget how to make conversation, and become obsessive. this is not real life. the rules are great they work, but are psychologcally intimidating, and they take away your individuality. there is something more then just a set of rules for finding the right person, better to follow your intuition
Rating:
Summary: Excellence
Review: This book should not be denigrated by feminists: it is a groundbreaking feminist book! Following The Rules forces women to concentrate on their own lives instead of on 'will he call?' and thus to lead more fulfilling lives. And it is NOT just working on the 'average guy' - in fact, the richer and more accomplished and more self-realized a guy is the more a woman would need to stick by The Rules to remain interesting for him. Men don't like to be clung to, it stifles them and yes, they are hunters - it's just using one's intelligence to work with the facts instead of denying them. The Rules are realistic in their assessment of the differences between men and women and this realistic approach - instead of wishful thinking - as a frame of reference makes the dating game become a balanced part of a woman's life instead of a frustrating zone. Recent scientific research only goes to confirm these male-female differences, the 70's stand of all differences being cultural indoctrination is just untenable: we're equal but different. If a pan is hot one does not use one's bare hands to pick it up, if for a research paper one has to collect data in a certain way one does it like that; if one has to pay in the supermarket one stands in line - if one knows certain facts about male behaviour it is only smart to use this in one's approach to romance. Fein and Schneider's books and their tips like 'do not think too much about a man while your working' [now is this a great career move or what?] and 'be the first one to end a phone call' [i.e. don't cling] are common sense every girl and woman should read. Six stars!
Rating:
Summary: Not bad.
Review: I bought this along with a few others. I agree, it does have good points to ponder in there, points our mothers and mother's mothers thought of as "common", or even "common sense". But it's probably a good idea to not take it too seriously or word for word. After all, ever combination of a man and woman is going to be unique, as all our histories are unique. And in this day and age of countries with fewest boundaries, cultural differences really need to be taken into consideration. One thing I can pledge is true: the part about always being the one to end the date, end the phone conversations and appaering like more of a scheduled item to be yearned for: It DOES work. As soon as I stopped being/appearing so interested in guys, and didnt care as much whether they called me or not, they flocked in like hot geese over a cool lake!
How many of us have noticed after a break-up that availalbe men seem to be coming out of the walls? Then, when we have little or no interest? There is certainly something to that. This book will give you some insights like that. However, if MAN is not a battlefield or an entity to be roped in and harnessed, I would recommend getting "Getting to 'I Do'". It's about masculine and feminine personalities, and how they match or don't...a little more of a modern insight into the mysteries of our unique personalities and tendencies, and not lump herds as a whole. For this reason I give this book 4 stars.
Rating:
Summary: A Good Job by Fein & Schneider
Review: The Rules will help a women weed out the losers (dating you for sex, fun, etc.) so she can have a better chance of running into the winners (men that respect & love her). The book offers great practical advice that goes beyond dating. THe Rules can also be used on friends, family. The basic massage throughout The Rules is self-repect and independence-WHAT WOMEN WOULD NOT WANT THAT! The only problem that I have with the rules: It makes it seem as if all relationship problems are the women's fault.
Rating:
Summary: Sounds scary/wierd but actually works!
Review: As far as the use of tactics for results goes, this book is a winner! At least, if you want a painfree, love life and the happiness of being appreciated. Though the book is somewhat simplistic,and at times ridiculous in presentation nonetheless the basic premise of the book is sound.
Tired of hearing "I like you, but I don't love you" at the least inappropriate moments with a man/men to whom you have given your all. Sad indictment of men but unfortunately true, that if you make guys 'sweat' you are more valued - 'the seemingly , unattainable girl' is the girl men seem to fall in love with. Applying the Rules saves us girls so much physical and emotional energy and often mental devastation. Seems to work onpeoplefromalloccupations,medicalspecialists,lawyers,salespersonal,etc. Please e mail me,Tess ... if you'd like to share thoughts about these Rules. The Rules 1+2 rock for a painfree (and happy) emotional life!
Rating:
Summary: Thanks to "The Rules" I am happily married to my Dream Man.
Review: I did it. My husband and I were married a year ago after dating for two years. It has been the most romantic, fun, and rewarding time of my life. My husband is extremely intelligent (a celebrated scientist), handsome, and hard working, loyal, supportive, and understanding. I like him tremendously. He is my best friend. I only got to meet him because I took The Rules seriously and moved away from a dead-end relationship. Besides, The Rules encouraged me to date many men, without jumping into intimacy with any of them. For once, I waited until I was in a committed relationship with before baring my soul and/or my privates. Furthermore, I spent more time pampering myself and doing fun things with friends and family, because these kept me not only "busy" and unavailable for last minute plans or waiting around for some guy to call, but they also made my life fuller and richer. The best thing about following the rules was that since I did not try to fill up minutes with bubbly talk, instead I spent more time listening to my dates so that by the time I ended a first date I could tell if I liked a man enough to see him again. (Also, letting them pick the place gives you real insight to their idea of a "good time.") So, I was doing "the choosing," even though I wasn't doing the "picking" or the "hunting." In other words, I let guys decide if they liked me enough to make the first move. Yet, I wasn't passive in the process, nor was I accepting unsuitable men. And, I learned to appreciate it when a man was interested enough to go out of his way to make me comfortable in his life. I only wish I'd read the rules at younger age so that I wouldn't have made so many mistakes before. My sister recommended I read "The Rules," years ago. I resisted, but when I finally admitted that my romantic life was a string of disappointments and I decided to take control it paid off. Sure, "The Rules" is not a well-written book. It is very blunt and its prose is lacking in any kind of literary prowess. (Yet, I am eternally grateful to the authors for writing the series of books and insist that the fact that their own marriages did not work out is no indicator that the advice they offered to women was inherently flawed. There are many factors that play into the long-term stability of any relationship. I'm sure that the stress and strain of sudden best-seller success could put intense pressure on any marriage. ) However, if you can get over that and take the advice seriously it can change your life.
Rating:
Summary: Practical advice
Review: I just had a few observations to make, and they perhaps have more to do with the human behavior this book discusses rather than with the quality of the book itself, which I thought had at least a few good, pieces of practical advice. This book isn't for the committed feminists out there--because it advises women to go back to the "old rules," with the woman playing traditionally hard-to-get and letting the man be the pursuer. But it seems to be the kind of advice many women are looking for. It's interesting, because I recently also read "Getting to I Do," and it also suggests women go back to the traditionally more feminine role--even to the extent of recommending witholding sex until you get a commitment from the man that he's really serious about the relationship, and even marriage. But getting back to the present book, which seems to be much more controversial, but it basically also urges women to use the same strategy and go back to a more traditionally feminine approach to the dating and mating game. This seems to have offended some reviewers, but to have struck a responsive chord with many others. One reviewer who denigrated the book's advice said its approach was manipulative, dishonest, and that it was only good for getting your "average, beer-drinking guy." By implication, this suggests that you couldn't get a quality guy by following this advice (whatever a "quality guy" would be). Maybe so, but what this reviewer doesn't seem to understand is that the vast majority of women are average too--not just the vast majority of men. And therefore the average woman might be quite content with the average guy, and vice-versa...What a "quality" guy was, however, she didn't say--maybe a "wine-drinking guy?" And maybe a "cognac- drinking guy" would be even better? In any case, it seems pretty obvious to me that in the dating and mating game it's "different strokes for different folks" just as in many other areas of life. Anyway, all that was just by way of saying I didn't see the book's approach as a negative or inherently insulting to either men and women, although I realize you could perhaps argue about the morality or details of some of its rules--but probably not about the results--since many of the reviewers here feel they do indeed work. My problem with the book is different, and it's about an issue the book really doesn't discuss. It's not about the morality of the book's approach, or whether it goes against 40 years of women's liberation, or whether it's insulting to both men and women, or whether it's only good for catching your "average, beer-drinking guy." The problem for me is the concept of "Mr. Right" itself, and that's because for many women, perhaps most women, "Mr. Right" unfortunately is some studly, flashy, macho guy, who they then fall for, maybe even marry, and then they complain when he isn't "sensitive." Well, what did they expect? If you're attracted to someone because of very superficial qualities, don't be surprised when they don't have the more important deeper qualities that a real relationship requires. Of course, there's the possiblity you might be able to change him, but from what I've seen, satisfying a woman's emotional and intimacy needs isn't exactly this sort of guy's most important goal in life. However, the men are in no better shape. Men are often attracted to these beautiful women who are probably horrible human beings to begin with, and then are surprised when these women drive them crazy with their narcissistic, selfish ways and their gold-digger mentalities. Again, when you're mainly attracted by very superficial qualities you have no-one but yourself to blame for your problems. On the other hand, real beauty is just as likely to scare a man off as to attract him, whereas prettiness properly handled can be a much more advantageous asset. Ironically, that leaves the beautiful women to be pursued by the macho, studly guys I spoke of earlier who don't lack for confidence but who lack just about every other important human quality, or at least the other qualities a woman wants. So it seems the really beautiful women, who our superficial society virtually lionizes, worships and holds up as ideals--are destined to have no trouble attracting men but spending most of their time unhappy or miserable with the results. Well, maybe that's life, or just human behavior, and there isn't much that can be done about it. Still, this book has some practical advice for navigating the treacherous waters of the modern dating and relationship game, and for those who still have the courage to brave the waters, the knowledge in this book should be a good life-preserver.
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