Rating: Summary: A revealing examination of a disturbing relational pattern Review: "Women Who Love Too Much" is a revealing examination of dysfunctional behavior performed in the name of so-called "love."According to Norwood, "women who love too much" are characterized by low self-esteem, a need to be needed, a strong urge to change and control others, and a willingness to suffer. They respond not to being loved, but to being needed. Such women tend to be the product of emotionally unavailable parents and continue the pattern by forming relationships with emotionally unavailable, distant men. Norwood examines this behavior repeatedly, not only through portraits of women who fit these characteristics, but interestingly, through honest portraits of men who have been partners in such relationships. Norwood's recommendations for countering this behavior include seeking help, making your own recovery the first priority in your life, finding a support group of peers who understand, developing a spiritual side through daily practice, stopping the practice of managing and controlling others, learning not to get hooked into games, courageously facing your own problems and shortcomings, cultivating whatever needs to be developed in yourself, learning how to become self-honoring, and sharing with others what you have learned. Overall, the focus is on self-development rather than seeking a solution in someone else who will love you as you think you want to be loved.
Rating: Summary: INSIGHTFUL INFORMATION IF YOU HAVE THE PATIENCE TO FIND IT. Review: Ms. Norwood's book does indeed have useful information, exercises and case scenarios for women in relationship crises (readers will probably relate better to the histories, even if they are fabricated) with self-absorbed, distant, emotional vampires and how to find the self-love and healing required to get rid of them: the problem is in getting past the dry, overly-worded, rambling text to glean out the lessons. Although I learned a lot and consider the book valuable, women who don't have a lot of free time or a long attention span will probably get too impatient to benefit from it and quit. For those who don't mind the excessive verbalizing, this is a good tool to re-vamp your life as you relate to your partner(s) and can help future relationships, but for those of us with jobs/kids/lives, please read "Men Who Hate Women" by Dr. Susan Forward, who is more succinct and includes truthful case scenarios with women and men that can lead to insight and ultimately, healing (hint: in future reprintings, could this get EDITED any better to help the next generation? Thanks!!).
Rating: Summary: Advice good but..."case histories" in book are fiction Review: This book was good in its approach to women and men who give too much and get little in return in relationships. However, it is extremely important to remember that Robin Norwood, the author, later admitted that the various case histories presented in the book are really herself (see Backlash, The War Against American Women, by Susan Faludi). It is good that this book has helped so many people, but I think it is wise to be honest in self-help books like this one, because one of the goals of this book is to enable you to be more honest with yourself, and what you want in your relationships.
Rating: Summary: A gift of pages!!!! Review: I am a 29 year old gay male.You may think to yourself "How can this book be of any help and use to him?" "Women Who Love Too Much" has been a life-saver for me,having recently come out of an unhealthy relationship. I am unashamed to say that i was the more "unhealthy person" in that relationship but at the same time,the book gave me tremendous insight as to how unhealthy my partner was. My therapist suggested that i read the book,explaining that the dynamics of relationship are much the same,whether they be homosexual or heterosexual.Please don`t ignore what i have said in this review because my lifestyle is alternative. You who are reading this review,may know somebody close to you who is lesbian or gay.Do they "love too much",are they in an unhealthy relationship,are they in desperate need of help?Whatever their situation may be and most likely it is an unpleasant one,"Women Who Love Too Much" is a definite beginning to heal the pain. I will forever be grateful for having read this book and with no doubt,will keep on reading it.The knowledge,understanding and insecurities i have gained about myself is the knowledge that will steer me in the direction of a truthful,happy and healthy relationship. Thank you Robin Norwood,where-ever you may be in this world.
Rating: Summary: Changed My Life Review: As with many of the reviews I've read, this book changed my life as well. I kept choosing the same type of relationship over and over again, and didn't realize what I was doing. When I read this book I finally understood how I choose the people in my life, and it opened my eyes to an entirely new way of relating to myself and to others. I was amazed at how my mind continued to recreate my childhood in order to 'fix' it, when that is not the healthy way to fix things. This started me on me on the road to recovering from codependency, and I realized that my happiness was in my own hands. I believe it's in her preface where she says "If being in love means being in pain, you are loving too much." That was my history, and it spurred me to read the rest of the book. I can spot these traits in other people so well now it's amazing. We chose our friends. We create our lives. And my happiness is dependent on no one but myself. No longer will I continue to blame my parnter for my unhappiness. Though I spent a great deal of time letting this concept sink in, now it is a part of my belief system, and I a grateful for it. Excellent book, I cannot thank Robin Norwood enough, for I feel like she saved my life.
Rating: Summary: TRUTH: BOOK IS GOOD BUT LYING IS A PROBLEM... Review: While this book did have a lot of helpful information for people with codependency problems in relationships, it is very, very important to bear in mind that MANY of the clients discussed in the book are in reality, fictional. Norwood later admitted that "many of her patients in the book are really just her." (reference: Backlash:The Undeclared War Against American Women, by Susan Faludi, 1991). So although the author did take more than a few liberties with the truth, I still give it 2 stars based on some of the good info presented to help women heal and/or leave their relationships.
Rating: Summary: This book is a must . . . Review: ... for women who can't understand how & why they keep getting stuck in relationships where they are taken for granted or abused. I was given a copy of this book in 1993 by the bank officer who helped me open my bank account when my marriage was falling apart and this book changed my life! It had such an impact on me that ever since, as soon as I realize that any of my female associates & friends are in these types of destructive relationships, this is the book I buy for them. I've probably bought this book 20 times in the last 7 years . . . I gave up on lending it out, and just buy my friends a copy, because I never get mine back! To Robin Norwood, thank you for putting into words what I needed to hear & opening my eyes 7 years ago. My life has totally changed for the better & I am now in a wonderful relationship. (Ladies, there are good ones out there! Don't settle for less!) There have been bumps along the way, but I will always have my trusty well-worn copy of the book to remind me that *I* can change this pattern forever!
Rating: Summary: Dont Judge this book by the cover... It's a great read... Review: I read this book a year ago. It was absolutely great. I give Robin much respect for trying to help women get it together. I just wish that the title was different. I was so embarrassesd reading this book with the cover showing on the train to Manhattan everday. But after really getting into it I didn't care what people(MEN) thought.. WOMEN by this book it's worth every penny...
Rating: Summary: A life changing tool Review: When I first started to read this book I could not put it down. I read it from cover to cover the first night. The book identified behaviors and feelings I wasn't even aware of. It was a painful look into my life, and yet it gave me the direction to make my life better. I have given it to countless friends, and I have never had anyone say it didn't help. It is a good book to re-read from time to time, as I did recently and saw that I was slipping into old behaviors with a relative. It put me back on track, and I was back to being happy again. This book is an invaluable tool to anyone who feels that for some reason they are not happy, and yet can't put their finger on it. It helps you see what you are doing wrong, and why you do it. It then guides you through fixing the problem.
Rating: Summary: At least helping me getting through what I'm in right now... Review: My therapist handed this book to me. I finished it in a few days. It really helps me understand what I'm going through and most importantly myself. It gives me hope (under present circumstances) of recovery and self healing and self improvement. I've never read a self help book from which I can apply its content as much as this one.
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