Trapped in the Mirror

Rating:
Summary: good in naming the problem but lacking in solutions
Review: this book is very valuable in the sense that it seems to be theonly book out there addressed specifically to/for the children ofnarcissists. however, (and the author does do a good job describing the repercussions) there doesn't seem to be any strong solutions offered to the problem, nor even much hopefullness in the tone (combined with the author's tendency to interject her own story into the text). hopefully someone (perhaps even ms.golomb herself) will take analysis of this issue to the next level and develop a clear-cut methodology for overcoming it.

Rating:
Summary: Worth Sharing
Review: I am buying this book for all my siblings. I am very grateful to have a name for my frustrations. And I am grateful to the author for helping me see my own (learned) narcissism. I want to break the hereditary cycle. I can't say enough positive things about this book!

Rating:
Summary: author gets caught in her own story
Review: This book promises to help the reader understand more about the effects of a narcissistic parent. I found the ideas interesting but the author's style of repetitive use of annecdote became an impediment to understanding. There were too many examples so that the stories began to overlap and the point became lost in the details. I would also have appreciated more from the author about how she had learned to set boundaries and have a relationship with her family. I had hoped to find a book to be able to recommend to clients but this one is not it.

Rating:
Summary: begins better than it ends
Review: At first I found this book immensely clarifying in its description of narcissism and its effects--as described in the various "cases." Ultimately, however, I did not find the chapters promising help to be especially helpful; there are more case studies in a briefer format and Golomb's own background interjected repeatedly. While descriptively helpful, there was, for me, a sense of frustration with the dramatic language and the obvious anger in the text. I expected more hopefulness, and its lack was distressing. Still, I think the book has much to teach and is well worth the time. It rings true to my own experience.

Rating:
Summary: THIS IS YOUR LIFE
Review: You are searching, reaching; you've been in therapy but your therapist keeps talking to you like the problem is within YOU, and your refusal to accept your mother or father and their dysfunctions. Ohhhh are you in for a treat. FIRE YOUR THERAPIST, declare WAR on new age REIKI and crystals and politically correct B-llshit that reigns in Social Worker's minds. THIS is the problem, THIS is your life, THIS is how to begin working out the kinks, THIS is the truth. Fire your therapist and buy this book. You will be right behind me, writing a similar review.

Rating:
Summary: Gently touches the pain you were told didn't exist!
Review: Yes!! The individual case-study/stories helped, but mostly the definitions of a narcissitic parent and the analysis of resulting pain in the child was exactly what I could never find the words to say myself. If you even suspect that you are unhappily living your life in order to please your parents you must read this book.

Rating:
Summary: This is one of the best and most basic books on the subject.
Review: This is by far the most understandable easy to relate to books on the subject. Most other books Ive found are much too clinical. The author writes from both her own expertise and personal experience with her father.I dont feel quite as alone now thanks to her.

Rating:
Summary: Narcissism is Nasty! Recognizing it is Necessary!
Review: Narcissism cripples and it is a generational trait that needs to be eradicated. Patterns have to be broken inorder for the following generation to be better healed. I saw the traits of narcissism in the many people used in this book. In the end I saw the narcissism I had inherited from my own mother. To name it, to know it, to own it in oneself is the beginning of killing the beast and cracking the mirror we, as children of narcisists are trapped in.

Rating:
Summary: Wonderfully eye-opening
Review: In a classic example of what happens "when the student is ready," I found this book at a friend's house while idly poking through the titles on his bookshelves. We had just been talking about this very subject over dinner that evening and I wanted to know more. And here is this fantastic book!

I'm heartened to see this 10-year-old book sustains a high sales ranking. Her professional informative content is surpassed only by her person nerve to self-disclose. The book deserves to stay current and alive for decades to come.

Thanks to what I learned in Trapped in the Mirror, I can at last say: "Ohhhhhh, now I get it."

Rating:
Summary: A little dull but useful
Review: I had a hard time completing this book because the narrative keeps shifting from memoir style accounts of the author's own experience, to therapist-like (and somewhat impersonal) explanations and interpretations. Also sprinkled here and there are a few clinical-case type of accounts of other people's experiences, which usually felt a little imcomplete and not totally woven into the rest of the book. It was a little chopped up for my style. I found myself skipping parts and putting the book down for a few days before getting back to it (wanting to complete it more out of self-discipline than anything else) The best part comes in the last couple of chapters when the author finally discusses some concrete suggestions about how to deal with a narcissistic parent/person. I suggest borrowing this book instead of buying it. I also suggest "Children of the self-absorbed" by Nina Brown as an alternative read.