Rating: 
Summary: Break the Cycle of Abuse
Review: Lundy Bancroft breaks the cycle of abuse and blows the cover off abusive men, revealing the techniques and thought patterns of abusive men and offering women the information they need to see beyond the manipulation, excuses, and myths that have kept them victims for too long. A must read for all who are personally affected in any way by an abusive man.
Rating:
Summary: A very poignant explanation of controlling men - please read
Review: Lundy Bancroft has captured within this book the heart of one of the biggest problems being involved with abusive and controlling men - the constant and neverending struggle to understand why he can be so cruel when he swears he loves so much. It is at times a very painful read, especially when Mr. Bancroft tackles all the myths women have relied upon to rationalize and somehow justify or downplay the abuse. He has de-mystified these types of men and has explained the source of their actions and mindset with a clarity that can be as frightening as it is freeing. You will not find one excuse you've ever used to justify an abusive partner's treatment that isn't addressed in this book and shown for what it truly is. If you are, or even think you might be in an abusive relationship, or trying to recover from one, this book is an absolute must read. In fact, I would even recommend getting it in hardback; it will become your bible of liberation from the crazymaking created from being involved with an angry and controlling man.
Rating:
Summary: The Best Book On The Subject Of AbusiveRelationships.
Review: Lundy Bancroft has done an exceptional job of identifying abuse, defining abuse and advising against allowing one's self to be abused any longer. This book gives strength to the abused to make lasting change. It puts into words, experiences that were previously inexplicable. It clears up confusion for anyone who has been or is being abused. It gives confidence to do what is necessary to get out. I didn't like the use of foul language, however I understand that Lundy was being real and quoting abusers who do use these words. It helped me to understand the completely insideous mind-set of the abuser, and gave practical advise of how to take a firm stand against such devastating treatment.
Rating:
Summary: Validation & End to the "crazymaking"
Review: Lundy Bancroft helped me realize that I wasn't crazy, out-of-touch with reality, or always wrong. I spent eight years with an abuser and finally found freedom from abuse by reading and re-reading his book.
The book validated my experiences but seeing the words and actions of my abuser repeated in those pages, realizing that he wasn't 'crazy' or out-of-control but intentional and purposeful was very hard to read, somehow it made it worse, and it was already bad enough.
If you aren't sure or you are sure you're in an abusive relationship read this book.
Rating: 
Summary: Here comes your white knight, bearing drama...
Review: Lundy Bancroft's book about the abusive personality is a non-clinical, mass-market missive which explains the reasons behind why abusive men do what they do, and interprets irrational and/or angry behavior for female readers, hopefully so they can find some validation and motivation to do something for themselves. This book has really struck a chord with many women who have been in abusive relationships; they appear to find great comfort in it.In comparison with the incredible and ever-growing stack of books about abuse and domestic violence, I have some major problems with this book.
Bancroft poses as a veritable white knight; a self-styled savior of women. His tone is at times condescending and overly zealous in catering to women's emotions, and I'd guess this is exactly what he wants. It's as if he's making the claim, "Ladies, no one understands your pain like I do." He paints with huge, careless brushstrokes, depicting all men as tyrants out to destroy women, while describing all women as helpless, innocent martyrs. He pulls odd one-sided statistics out of thin air to frighten and arouse the anger of women, without backing himself up very well. He asks incredibly stupid rhetorical questions in an effort to spread the myth that women are incapable of aggressive behavior: "Why are there no men in domestic violence shelters?" Answer: Because there are *no* shelters for battered men, and when men are abused, they don't talk about it; furthermore, most domestic violence shelters won't take men in. But Bancroft can't admit this. He's an alarmist, and this book stands to put female readers in a hyper-vigilant state where they couldn't meet a man or date without asking themsleves what Bancroft would think. He preaches fear, mixed with a rather grandiose, forced sense of compassion; this is fear-and-consumption at its worst. Donald Dutton, Noelle Nelson, and Lorna Benjamin have written far-superior books on the dynamics of abusive relationships that offer sound advice to victims without playing into their misery, and without sexist assumptions and fear-inspiring propaganda. However, if you want a book to absolve you of any personal responsibility and paint your partner as a total monster, then Lundy Bancroft is more than willing to be your dragon-slaying Saint George. I would hope that any book about abuse dynamics would greatly help to empower victims, and you'd think that since this book is geared specifically toward women, that it would empower them. But it seems to have an undercurrent of the woman-as-child theme running through it, which is about as dis-empowering as you can get.
Rating:
Summary: The bible for women in abusive relationships
Review: Talk about a LIGHT in the darkness. This book is incredible. No where can you find a book that speaks so directly, so wisely to what is actually happening in abusive relationships. When things are bad I carry this book around with me. It is so supportive and empowering!!
It is a sane word in an insane, crazy making, confusing situation. It is AMAZING how time and time again Lundy Bancroft NAILS what is happening right on the head and he is empathetic and gentle to those who are caught in it. It is more than that -- is a LIFELINE. Buy this book. YOu will be soooo glad you did and for once you will not feel that there is something wrong with you and you will know that you are not alone. A MUST for those involved with abusive men and those trying to help. Thank you Lundy Bancroft.
Rating:
Summary: Powerful book for someone at a crossroads
Review: There simply is no other book about verbal abuse on the market today as powerful and helpful as this book. If the title of the book speaks to you, then you will find very valuable information in it that will help you make choices about what to do next with your relationship. I have told a few people about it and everyone who has read it has had the same astonished reaction about how dead-on accurate it is. Readers who are in abusive relationships will immediately recognize the characterizations. Those who care about people in abusive relationships will gain insight into what their loved ones are going through. It is immediately apparent that the author has a real grasp of how the game of verbal abuse is played; he is frank about both that and the abuser's prospects for change.
Thank you, Lundy Bancroft, this book is a powerful roadmap for taking control of your life back.
Rating:
Summary: Thank you; I'm not crazy!
Review: This book helped me enormously! I read the book several times, first the whole way through, and then as a refernce when things would start to get bad again. The book explains so much of the why's and how's of the abuser. All the questions that had been in my head was answered in this book. I think this book has helped in my healing process by giving me knowledge to see through the abuse and see what is really going on.
Rating:
Summary: Essential for any woman looking for a serious relationship
Review: This book is a must-read for a woman trying to escape from an abusive relationship, as well as women looking for one. I highly recommend it for dating teens, because it tells you all the warning signs of an abusive man. The best way to deal with an abusive relationship is not to get into one - and there are always red flags. If it's too late, this lady tells you how to escape. An excellent insight into who these men are, why they do it, and how to cope with it.
Rating:
Summary: Inside the Minds of Angry and Controlling Men
Review: This book is amazing! I feel it saved my life. I highly recommend this book and the books by Patricia Evans. Lundy's experience in counciling men who abuse has enabled him to see through the subtle lies and manipulations they often do to get their way. He includes many examples, advice, and outlines in full detail the types of things abusers will do to keep you within their realm of control. An excellent book.
| 
