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Summary: "Selfishness Matters" might be a better title
Review: A person in midlife crisis is often hoping to fill the emptiness in their soul by seeking some selfish gain. This is just the book
to help them justify their selfishness. It is important to examine our lives and see where we may need healing from past hurts that are holding us back from reaching our full potential. For this purpose the book could be helpful if it's potential for harm were not so great. However, this book is based on a faulty assumption that people are basically good until they are hurt in some way. Under this assumption, if we heal the hurts, we will again be basically good. No, we will still be basically selfish! If you are looking for a book to justify your selfishness, you found it. Just what our culture needs, more justification for selfishness. Thanks Dr McGraw.
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Summary: More focused than most self-help books
Review: Having read a lot of self-help books and having been a counselor myself, I found this book to be very useful for someone who is willing and motivated to stick with it, do the exercises, and learn more about themselves. The book won't "do it" for the reader, but can show some clear methods for gaining flexibility and focusing on one's goals. "The stuff your parents and schools didn't tell you...."
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Summary: [Reader] on "self matters"
Review: Trying to figure out who you are and why you are that way? This is a good book for the person searching for their "authentic self." This book gives you a down-to-earth, straight-talking' approach to your problems and how to solve them. It explains that many causes for your problems and unhappiness come from outside influences that shouldn't be affecting your life at all. It gives a step-by-step plan for identifying and changing your self into a person who lives life to the fullest. I would recommend this book to almost anyone because it applies to almost everyone in some form or another. Great for teens on through senior citizens. read it soon!
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Summary: Get real and move on with your life
Review: Dr Phil is as big and as bold in this book as he is on Oprah. And as successful in giving you a workable solution to problems that seem intractable and impossible to solve.
The big shortcoming in any self help book or therapy session is the let out clause that is open when all you do is talk or read about an issue and solutions are put out that are easy to say and believe. No one questions you're motives or makes you take that big hard stare into a well-illuminated mirror. This book however is the one where you "get real."
Doctor Phil illuminates points with anecdotes and presents things in a way that makes it hard to ignore the truth however unflattering that may be to your self-image. He gives us exercises that mean that if you're serious about this programme, and I am, then there is more than empty words and rhetoric, there is light at the end of the tunnel.
It's easy to be hard and brutal in assessing a situation, but Phil avoids being a drill sergeant by the incisive nature of his criticisms and by offering accessible solutions.
This may well be the book that we are all looking for.
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Summary: A lot of hard work ... but worth a try.
Review: This really is not your average self help book. Dr. Phil is just so straight forward and easy to "listen" to, that this book really can hit the spot. If you are truly dedicated to reconnecting with yourself, with finding your 'authentic' self, then grab a notebook and a pen with lots of ink, because with this new and exciting book from America's Dr. Phil, you will definitely need it. I admit I did not do each and every exercise in writing, because I like to read in bed, but what I did not do in writing I tried to do in my head (not the same - I know!) and I actually did come up with some pretty startling revelations about myself! I do believe that if you follow Dr. Phil's advice, if you totally dedicate yourself to the task and really buckle down with the writing exercises, you can achieve the goal - finding and living your authentic self, instead of all those plastic personas we all wear in different situations. If you choose not to write the exercises, I recommend the book anyway, because Dr. Phil is never a waste of time, and his narratives in this book are no exception. A truly remarkable and in depth look at the human self, Dr. Phil has navigated his way into our thoughts - again!
Rating: 
Summary: Affirmative -- but maybe not deep enough?
Review: Sure, my life may have a root core, and understanding that may be the way to create my life the way it was meant to be. However, I was surprised that the goal of this understanding, as presented by the Dr., is for me to get what I want. What I mean is, I am suppose to use the information, for me, to get what I want out of life, so that I am satisfied. Sure, there is nothing wrong with personal satisfaction, but the way it is promoted in this book it is more self-centered and self-aggrandizing. What happened to self-satisfaction through serving and loving others? What happened to doing what is right, regardless of what I get out of it? Yes, the self matters, but it is not all that matters.I do like the idea of evaluating the ten most defining moments of a person's life, as well as the five most pivotal people in a person's life. These items do help in conceptualizing the moments which shape a person's worldview. Furthermore, understanding these may allow a person to abandon false excuses given to excuse non-productive and dangerous behaviors. However, this may simply result in a clearer understanding of the problem, while providind an answer to that problem. The answer needs to be separate from the problem and I don't think this is conveyed in this book. Rather understanding the problem is the answer. However, that doesn't provide enough substance. The large assumption I believe Dr. Phil makes is that if a person finds their true self, that true self will be what that person should be. I truly don't think he acknowledges the possibility that a person may find their true self and that self may be still be in need of reformation or healing. He criticizes the victim mentality and then goes on to suggest that each person is inherently good, but they have been tainted/damaged through life. (ie: victims) It would be helpful if he acknowledged the disconnect/contradiction here and explained how these two items fit together. (or admit that one should be abandoned) In short, this is a feel-good self-esteem book. It is very different from some of the other books which attempt to get at the heart of the issue through deep introspection, analysis, and confrontation. If his premise is correct, that people are basically good and need to wake up to that, then this is a good book. However, if another premise is correct, that people are flawed, and in need of a serious prescription to a serious problem, then this book degrades to self-delusion and a false self-esteem.
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Summary: Dr. Phil Tells it Like It Is!
Review: Dr. Phil cuts through the psychobabble of modern self-help theory and tells it to us straight. Take charge of your life - start making decisions and living them now - stop waiting for someone else to make things happen for you - look into the mirror and see yourself for who you are and then go on from there. This is a great book and reminds me of the common sense approach Matt Pasquinilli takes in his book The Child Whisperer. The Child Whisperer is categorized as a parenting book, but I found it most useful as a self-guide to developing emotional understanding and an ability to see the truth in relationships. I suggest getting The Child Whisperer and read it along with Dr. Phil's Self-Matters.
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Summary: Reclaiming your fire.
Review: If you are unsatisfied with how your life is going and you are ready to buckle down and make some changes, Dr. Phil's is here to support you in "SELF MATTERS." McGraw leads you through a series of exercises aimed at getting you to evaluate the events, people, and decisions that have played a key role in your personal development. Once you've identified areas such as "Your 10 Defining Moments" or "Your 5 Pivotal People," you can create a new roadmap to your authentic self by changing the things that haven't worked for you and by investing more fully in the things that have. One of my favorite sections was a discussion of "tapes" - conversations we have in our heads that play over and over, limiting who we are. Dr. Phil encourages you to go for it in life, to "drive with passion." For those who want another refreshing perspective that will show you how to rediscover your sense of well-being and aliveness and live way beyond what your mind holds as possible, you should grab yourself a copy of "WORKING ON YOURSELF DOESN'T WORK," by Ariel and Shya Kane. The Kanes have mastered how to live in the moment and their book allows others to catch this magical phenomenon.
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Summary: Self Does Matter...
Review: I've read quite a few self-help books in my life. Everyone had good advice. Unfortunately, there were no plans to help the self, to find out what were the underlying issues causing the problems. In the 70s, the mental health professionals decided that long-term(meaning "years of")counselling probably wasn't helpful to most people. So along comes the behavioral change movement. Actually, it was helpful for me: I was in short term couselling for a number of life issues. Unfortunately though in the enthusiasm of short term couselling, some of the results were also short-term. Then, along comes Dr. Phil with Self Matters. I was ready. I had come to the conclusion myself that if I really wanted REAL changes, I needed to dig deep inside myself and SEE and ACKNOWLEDGE what tapes were running my life. It has been a roller coaster journey. I have almost finished the book and I can tell you this is not easy. What I mean by that is that you are forced to stare at your own reality and decide if you can go on living this way OR if you have the guts to make your life what it was meant to be. My conclusion? It's painful getting to your authentic self, but even more painful to stay inside the shell of a fake self
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Summary: One of the Best Psychology Books I Have Read
Review: This book by Dr. Phillip McGraw is truly outstanding. It takes the most important concept in psychology, the self concept, and explains how you acquire a self concept and what you do to maintain one, what he calls external factors and internal factors.
The books first few chapters are introduction followed by a section on External Factors, those external things that contribute to forming one's self concept. These are your 10 Defining Moments, 7 Critical Choices and 5 Pivotal People. You come to see how your view of yourself, what you are capable of, how worthy you are, your sense of your desireability to the opposite sex, etc... were developed through your life experiences and the conclusions you drew from them. That is followed by a section on Internal Factors, dealing with self talk, labels, tapes, fixed beliefs and life scripts. These are basically the things going on in your mind right now that pretty much determine what results you are going to achieve in your life. Then, the final part is the 5 Step Action Plan which is designed to take what you have learned and apply it to your own life to move forward from living as a fictional self to becoming truly authentic, truly the best you that you can be and want to be. Having read widely in psychology, there was not alot of new material in this book but alot of good insights are integrated into a very organized, concise and well written book. This book packs alot of punch.
I highly recommend this book and also recommend watching Dr. Phil on Oprah if you get a chance. It is 3pm on weekdays, so I am usually at work, but it is not to be missed!
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