Rating: 
Summary: Excellent resource for couples
Review: As a psychologist in a college counseling center, I don't often have the opportunity to work with couples, but when I do, I always recommend this book. GETTING THE LOVE YOU WANT is an excellent self-help manual which is appropriate for all couples looking to enhance or to repair their relationship. Harville addresses the unconscious factors which contribute to who we choose as a mate, particularly the impact that significant figures from our childhoods (namely, our parents) can have on our relationships. He goes on to discuss in detail his Ten Characteristics of Developing a Conscious Marriage (or relationship). Each characteristic is illustrated using examples as well as a series of simple exercises which couples complete either individually or together. The 16 exercises are what make this book effective, and so it is vital that couples using the book make a commitment to work together. Those who are motivated for change will reap the rewards of this excellent self-help tool.
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Summary: Working much faster than anticipated!
Review: We're an average couple with a toddler and all the accompanying stresses that finally brought all our relationship problems to the boiling point. When I found myself saying "I can't take this anymore" I decided to get the book because I'd heard good things about it. The text section at the beginning of the book completely made sense to me, so I asked my husband if he'd be willing to commit to doing the exercises with me. It's a commitment of one 1-2 hour session each week for 10 weeks. My husband was up for the plan, so we started it out.Here we are 3 weeks into the exercises, and our marriage is better than it's been at least since our son was born. We found that the simple act of signing our agreements to work through all the exercises in good faith and then doing week 1 (creating a common vision for your relationship) lifted a lot of tension and allowed us to be able to give each other the benefit of the doubt more easily. After slogging through the tough stuff of week 2 and then sharing it with each other in week 3 we seem to be closer than I can remember us being since the initial glow of infatuation wore off. I'm actually starting to look forward to our weekly sessions instead of dreading them as something we had to do because we didn't want to split up. Some of the reviewers of this book sound like it's got a magic incantation that you can say that will make your relationship fixed in an instant. That's not the case at all. It *does* give you the tools to help yourselves *if you want to*. You're still going to have to sit down and talk about it and write it down and think about yourself and what you really want and what you've been fooling yourself about. But the exercises are designed to bring you just as far as you need to go each week without overwhelming you. Some of the exercises seem a little hokey, but laughing at the language helped us bond a little more, so who cares? It's working so far. I'll post again in a few weeks when we're further into it to give an updated view.
Rating:
Summary: A must read for all
Review: A great book for those who are in a relationship but especially for those who are looking for a relationship (it would increase your chances of attracting and maintaining a good relationship). However, it is important that you are open to looking at your own issues and are willing to change where necessary. If you are not there yet, then read something else.
Rating: 
Summary: It takes two
Review: It is hard to tell others what we want, this book gives practical tips on how to do just that. If couples could only communicate better, so many children would have both parents under the same roof. I recommend anyone who is in a relationship to read this book. Also check out Rat Race Relaxer: Your Potential & The Maze of Life.
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Summary: best book ever
Review: Finally some one gets the whole picture! And puts it all in an easy to read book. Harville Hendrix not only explains the hows and whys of dying relationships he also has the cure. Most others only scratch the surface, he goes deep down. It can only be helpful to read it.
I want my daughters to read this book before they begin a marriage!
Rating:
Summary: AUTHOR REVIEW - FIVE STARS
Review: I read Hendrix's book, "Getting the love you want" and was taken with its simplicity. He offers a great deal of help for anyone who wants to obtain a meaningful, healthy relationship. His approach is fresh and free of the typical demonization of others. Excellent book that I highly recommend. John D. Moore, MS, CADC
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Author of Confusing Love with Obsession
Rating: 
Summary: Relationships are Nice, But Sex is Better
Review: I liked this book because it helped me with my relationship with my boyfriend, and since we tend not to get along very well, that's a good thing. Since we started getting along better after reading this book, he bought me "Five Minutes to Orgasm Every Time You Make Love," and that helped our relationship more than any other book I've ever read. This one helped our communication, and "Five Minutes" improved our sex life. What a great combination.
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Summary: This is the book you need if your love life is in shammbles!
Review: I wish I had gotten this book sooner! I was in a definate power struggle with my ex boyfriend and perhaps things would have turned out diffrently had we invested in the knowledge this book has to offer. First off, let me say this book is a bit Freudian, but at the very least its not medieval in any way. Essentially (according to the book), when you are born you are bombarded with a bunch of symbolic knowledge that helps you form your sense of self or what you "think" your sense of self is. When you are an infant not much of the world influences you, but as you get older pretty much everything does, one way or another, and we are pulled away... from what you could call... Your highest potential and happy blissful self. So you go out in the world some what traumatised/molded by the events of your past. Granted these "events" do not have to be perticularly painful, or troubled in some dramatic form. Just simply symbolic... For instance... As a child if your mother encouraged you to view the room across the hall, you may gather that the world is a safe place to explore and you have loved ones looking out for you when you get back. Or if your mother sheltered you or told you to always stay near her, you may learn the world is not a safe place to explore and that the needs of others are more important then your own curiousity. Simple but effective! So with our suppresed curiousities and what other unmet needs we had as children... we go looking for someone who embodies the "dominent" traits of our caregivers. To re-enact the trials we had as children to HEAL ourselves. The problem with this is, as much as we need to heal... a part of us (the old ego) wants these things like a child would want them... very selfishly at times, and demanding. That we begain to see our partners as slaves to our desires. We blame them for not making our world perfect (consiously or unconsiously)... because we forget that they are individuals as well. The power struggle begains... A lot of our problems, that we think the spouse/significant other is responsible for, are really the problems we are guilty of ourselves. I found this to be the hardest truth yet. But the book doesnt completely blame the reader, but gives revealing insight to why our loved one is acting the way they are based on their past and what unmet needs they have. Granted this book gets very detailed. Which it should! Its a deep read but very compelling. The author explains things in steps so youre not thrown under the tow of all the psychological concepts. However, not ONLY does the author tell you HOW you got here in the first place, but what YOU and your partner can do about it. The book never gets boring... I stopped reading it about mid-way becuase I thought, why read any further... My relationship is over, why would I want to go into the parts about how to fix it. I will tell you why, after continuing my reading, I got more then I bargained for, learning more about myself and my ex. Even though I cant perticularly "fix" anything (because he's a bit unwilling to take those steps) I understand WHY and Im at better peace because of it. The healing process can be slow and difficult but I think it is possible especially when you have the knowledge this book contains and the will of you and your partner to do so.
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Summary: A people oriented relationship model for Gays and Straights
Review: Dr. Hendrix demonstrates a model that is for anyone in romantic relationship with one another, whether gay, lesbian or heterosexual. While the examples are all heterosexual, this book can be easily adapted to gay and lesbian couples. I found this book to be one of the few out there about relationships that was not geared toward men and women in relationship with one another in terms of how men relate to women and vice versa.
It is about communication between two people in relationship and the mystery of why we are drawn to familiar love. It is not gender based. I applied much of the IMAGO principles to gay men in my book, Ten Smart Things Gay Men Can Do To Improve Their Lives" published by Alyson Books. I highly recommmend this book to all gay and lesbian couples including heterosexuals.
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Summary: Not a Fan, but Impressed
Review: I am a marriage educator and travel the globe giving workshops on relationships and have appeared on numerous television shows. I am often given books from publishers hoping that I would recommend them to my very large audience. I have read at least 100 books on love, marriage, etc. and this is certainly one of the better ones I have read in the last few years. What I find missing in this book is some of the practical application of the love but if you read *The Romantic's Guide* by Michael Webb, it will fill in the holes.
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