Between Gay and Straight: Understanding Friendship Across Sexual Orientation

Rating:
Summary: A study of understanding
Review: My name is Tim Mahn. I'm one of Lisa's and her husband, Doug's, closest friends, a friendship that will never end. I'm also one of the participants in Lisa's story. I had some obvious reservations about writing a review for Lisa's book. However, I know the positive changes that Lisa tries to make in our world - not just between the gay and straight communities, but between all communities. I then knew that I needed to voice my gratitude and respect for what she unselfishly has done and continues to do for us by giving you my perspective as a participant in her incredibly loving story.
Because of Lisa's and Doug's unconditional love and respect for us as people, as gay men, and most importantly, as friends, and the many sacrifices they both make for all of us, we agreed to take a journey with Lisa that positively changed our lives forever. Through challenging emotional trials, the developing of strong, lasting friendships across sexual orientation and the rebuilding of damaged familial relationships, Lisa brought us to a place where we could grow as people, as friends, as children and as partners. She encouraged us to be proud of who we are and to help others to do the same. She challenged us, as gay men, to open the closet door for our straight friends and families and give them the opportunity to know us. And most importantly, she helped us to face our fears and begin healing ourselves, our friends and our families.
There are many people who can gain strength from this book and begin down a path that leads to a happier place. I know that I have.

Rating:
Summary: I wish you all could know Lisa Tillmann-Healy
Review: My name is Tim Mahn. I'm one of Lisa's and her husband, Doug's, closest friends, a friendship that will never end. I'm also one of the participants in Lisa's story. I had some obvious reservations about writing a review for Lisa's book. However, I know the positive changes that Lisa tries to make in our world - not just between the gay and straight communities, but between all communities. I then knew that I needed to voice my gratitude and respect for what she unselfishly has done and continues to do for us by giving you my perspective as a participant in her incredibly loving story.
Because of Lisa's and Doug's unconditional love and respect for us as people, as gay men, and most importantly, as friends, and the many sacrifices they both make for all of us, we agreed to take a journey with Lisa that positively changed our lives forever. Through challenging emotional trials, the developing of strong, lasting friendships across sexual orientation and the rebuilding of damaged familial relationships, Lisa brought us to a place where we could grow as people, as friends, as children and as partners. She encouraged us to be proud of who we are and to help others to do the same. She challenged us, as gay men, to open the closet door for our straight friends and families and give them the opportunity to know us. And most importantly, she helped us to face our fears and begin healing ourselves, our friends and our families.
There are many people who can gain strength from this book and begin down a path that leads to a happier place. I know that I have.

Rating:
Summary: An interesting perspective, but academic in spots
Review: This book is essentially a first-person diary of a woman who gets to know a group of gay men when her husband's joins a local softball league. She is at the same time talking about getting her doctoral dissertation done in the area of communications. (Yet, ironically, I find her style a bit too unfocused and verbose at times.) It's an interesting perspective on straight people who become immersed in gay culture by developing a network of gay friends--and in this case, two straight people who become very comfortable in that context and become staunch allies behind gay civil rights issues, etc. What I dislike about the book is its tendency to "drone" at times (it is pretty much a diary after all), but what I like is that it offers many important insights from a straight perspective on friendships among gay and straight people. As a gay man whose circle of friends is largely straight, this particular topic has always interested in me. My own coming out experience actually drew me closer to my straight friends rather than straining the friendships (much to my surprise, actually), and I think that this book helps underscore how times have changed and how friendships, good frienships, can transcend sexual orientation. I think this book is well suited to a whole range of people, gay and straight, but I first read it to consider it as a gift to a straight friend, which I did end up giving. Sometimes I think it's helpful for straight people to get an open-minded but straight take on gayness and gay issues and friendship with gay people, and this book is an important contribution to this vein that I think began with "Will & Grace" on TV. I encourage more writers to explore gay/straight friendships, but I laud this book as an important early contribution to this area.

Rating:
Summary: A must read for gay/straight friends
Review: This is an amazing book. I could not put it down and finished it in 2 1/2 days. The author beautifully illustrates the compelling and often complex relationships between gay and straight friends. You ride an emotional roller coaster as you become angry at the hate in this world, cry over life's sorrows and laugh out loud while you become a part of the family the author and her participants create. And that is the real power of the book. It reveals that there is more than one definition of FAMILY! It is thought provoking and has helped me reaffirm my relationship with friends who have drifted away. I highly recommend it!

Rating:
Summary: A must read for gay/straight friends
Review: This is an amazing book. I could not put it down and finished it in 2 1/2 days. The author beautifully illustrates the compelling and often complex relationships between gay and straight friends. You ride an emotional roller coaster as you become angry at the hate in this world, cry over life's sorrows and laugh out loud while you become a part of the family the author and her participants create. And that is the real power of the book. It reveals that there is more than one definition of FAMILY! It is thought provoking and has helped me reaffirm my relationship with friends who have drifted away. I highly recommend it!

Rating:
Summary: Insightful and informative - A safe walk into the gay world
Review: What an insight for the straight world. I have recommended this book to several of my straight friends that have always asked me so many questions about the gay world. This book allows the reader to explore the gay world through the experiences of Lisa and Doug (a straight couple). You see their reactions and conclusion about the gay culture. Through their interactions you see that there is much to be gained from tolerance and understanding of all people.