Rating: 
Summary: A must-read that will change your outlook towards life
Review: The first time I saw it in the store, I was just merely attracted to the good looking man on the cover. I picked it up and I am so glad I did. This is basically a story about how a person who can be anyone of us, gay or not, handles life. We can relate to every thing told in the story regardless how old we are, where we are and what we are.
Rating: 
Summary: SELF-IGNORANCE
Review: This book is an autobiography and, as such, is supposed to be an exploration of self. It is not. There is no self-knowledge in this book. If Paul Monette came to any conclusions about his life they are not on display here. Here there is self-congratulation and self-loathing side by side and, achingly, these qualities never meet. He hates being homosexual, hates his body, hates his lack of talent--emotions churn unendingly--but never, Never, NEVER does he realize that these hates are aspects of one whole. Bitter invectives against the government, the straight world, people in general are presented with a self-complacency that astounded me from someone who never ceases to beat his own breast about other things and cry "mea culpa." It's like the man is two people, and these two haven't had a conversation in years. This book is a disaster from any point of view
Rating: 
Summary: A Powerful, Though Defensive, Book
Review: This book moves the reader with the author's personal story of coming out in a homophobic society, mostly during the pre-Stonewall era. Monette speaks powerfully about the importance of queer love, though he seems to get so wrapped up with the point of view of himself during that time that he seems to need to defend same-sex love.The book, written in the context of his lovers' AIDS deaths and his own illness, offers a stirring reminder of how the queer community has been devasted by the plague---one made far worse than necessary by the neglect and prejudice of the government and society as a whole. When you read the book, chances are that you will feel like a queer man in the fifties and early sixties, vividly reliving the experiences of trying to find the "laughing man," Monette's romantic ideal of a man that he could share joy and love.
Rating:
Summary: required reading
Review: This book serves as one of the truest and most meaningful journeys in a gay man's life. It should be required reading for all that dare to discover him/herself. He is a beautiful writer who suceeds in the truest sense of the word, the emotions of self discovery.
Rating:
Summary: ONE OF THE ALL-TIME GREAT BOOKS
Review: This book, more than anything else, helped me deal with my sexual orientation and provide me with the courage to come out of the closet. If you are closeted and have no one to turn to, please read this book. It will reassure you that you are not alone and that you have nothing to be afraid of. If you're already out, this book is still worth reading, as it is very inspirational. If you're not gay, however, you may have difficulty relating to this book.
Rating:
Summary: Truest of the True
Review: This is one of the most truly moving books and truly *true* books I have ever read, gay or straight, and one that stands out in my mind as a great exploration of contemporary life and love. This book's prose is achingingly beautiful and precise, something I rarely see in modern books. The fact that Monette and I grew up in the same town (Andover, Massachusetts) and that I, too, am gay and severely at odds with the world also made me feel a great deal of empathy for this man.
Rating:
Summary: Proud and also ashamed
Review: This novel represents a lot of things to a lot of different people, who relate to it on different levels. I myself relate to it in a number of ways -- as a great autobiography, an extended coming-of-age tale, a look into the gay past -- but I think for me one of the most special aspects is that Paul Monette and I grew up in the same home town. Andover, Massachusetts, plays a prominent role in this book and as a resident, I got chills during certain parts, times when I could see and feel the scenes he was describing all so well. The old crumbling cemeteries, the staid wooden Colonial homes with their old money residents, the men at the Andover Spa -- all of it's there. Of course, Paul Monette grew up in Andover long before my time, but it hasn't changed so much. Besides, it's the pain I could relate to. If there is any reservation I hold about this book, it's the fact that at certain points in the book, Paul Monette implies that certain cruelties he encountered in his life were directly caused by being gay. It seems to me (and my brother also, who also read it) that some of the things he describes have more to do with being sensitive or being a geek or not being rich enough for the crowd, than they do with being gay per se. I think there are guys who went through a lot of what he did only they weren't gay. Growing up in certain envrionment with certain personalities is painful whether you're gay or straight. I'm not saying it wasn't a factor, just that it seemed a few times the author was blaming everything on that.
Rating:
Summary: Finding Yourself as Paul Monette Finds Himself
Review: When I discovered this On Becoming A Man, I had just ended a relationship. I was very alone in a much lonelier environment. Reading Paul Monette's journey into becoming the man he was sitting there writing this work was tremendously eye opening to me. I bought several copies of this book and gave it to friends. I am still looking for what he described as his "laughing man." At almost the end of the book - he describes how he meet his then love of his life. Those words he wrote describing his feelings were so true. This is one of my favorite if not my most favorite gay work. I identify with him in far too many ways. I am a teacher as he was for a point in his life. He is a writer and I enjoy reading and writing. However - what you will see in this work is the journey a man traveled from his childhood until his adulthood. This is more than just a journey of learning to accept your sexuality. It is far more than that. Accepting your sexuality is just the trimming. He learned to accept himself - himself beyond the homosexual - himself the human being. He came to the realization that he could be a homosexual, a man, a good person, a caring and supportive lover and an outstanding person. All of that and a bag of chips. Keep the tissues handy when you read. And also keep a pen to underline some of his wonderful lines. Give this book to someone you love or should learn to love: first give it to yourself and then give it to someone else. huwv@aol.com
Rating:
Summary: Engaging
Review: When I first started reading this book, it started out a little slow. After the first few pages, however, I found that I couldn't put it down. It provides a very clear picture of what he was going through in his life. I highly recommend it.
Rating:
Summary: Engaging
Review: When I first started reading this book, it started out a little slow. After the first few pages, however, I found that I couldn't put it down. It provides a very clear picture of what he was going through in his life. I highly recommend it.
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