Grief, Transition, and Loss: A Pastor's Practical Guide (Creative Pastoral Care and Counseling Series)

Rating:
Summary: Good things come in small packages
Review: The book 'Grief, Transition, and Loss: A Pastor's Practical Guide', is a wonderfully compact gem of writing. This small book can be read by most in about an hour (for dyslexics like me, about two hours), but the lessons can last a lifetime. This is a very practical guide (just as the title indicates), but I regret the title says 'Pastor's', because this book can be used by far more, and subtitle places an unnecessary limitation on the potential audience.

Wayne Oates was professor of psychiatry and behavioural science at the University of Louisville, as well as a professor at the Southern Baptist Theological Seminary in Louisville.

This book is an absolute must for anyone who does any kind of ministry for those in crisis situations (which tends to be the time most people will reach out for such help). As such, it can be used by any health care professional, civil servants such as fire and police personnel, volunteer visitors to those who are homebound or in the hospital, and by the families themselves who are going through some trauma.

This book is organised around the grieving process, which doesn't necessarily imply a death situation. One chapter is entitled 'Grief and Separation in Divorce', showing clearly that grieving can occur whenever there is a loss, and not just at death.

This book teaches one to be prepared'for instance, many common events of celebration can quickly turn to crises. The birth of a baby, a wedding, a graduation, etc. can suddenly turn into an emergency and a time when great pastoral care is needed. What happens if the baby is stillborn? What happens if the bride or groom doesn't show for the wedding? What happens if there is a family blow-up at the graduation, and junior who's graduating drives off into the sunset?

The one giving care (and it needn't be an ordained person, by the way'forget the idea that some will try to foist upon you that the clergy have, or should have, a monopoly on pastoral care) needs to be sensitive and caring, and hopefully is someone acquainted with the 'slow wisdom of grief' that keeps one sane, steady, and responsive to the needs at hand.

In a mere 90 pages, Oates provides examples, strategies for action, coping, and resolution, for many of the major potential crises in life. He teaches how to discern different kinds of grief (pathological grief that doesn't fade with time, sudden-loss grief, which is different from anticipatory grief, and so on), and how to respond to each, with practical suggestions (just how does one plan a funeral while attending to the grieving process? how does one move the surviving partner, or sort out the financial matters, while attending to the feelings of loss?).

This is a great book for anyone in any caring or helping profession, and a good book for the rest who might like some insight so that when (and, in life, it is always WHEN, not IF) sorrow occurs, they might be better prepared to withstand the storm.