The Real You: Become the Person You Were Meant to Be

Rating:
Summary: An outstanding, illuminating and accessible book.
Review: I don't usually read self-knowledge/self-help books, and even more rarely finish them. The genre tends to suffer from poor writing, overuse of jargon, academic axe-grinding, and the smug tendency of the authors to try and jam you into their pet, pigeon-holed theories. (I wonder how many of those authors are first-borns, and if that's part of the problem for this last-born son?) I found "The Real You" to be mercifully free of all the flaws listed above, as well as a highly illuminating and pleasurable read. In fact, I not only finished "The Real You", I read it twice! (And so did two of the people I subsequently gave it to!) Dr. Leman presents four different methods of looking into your personality, and manages to do so without being either superficial or unwieldy. His acknowledged specialty is birth order, but the other sections are excellent too; the birth order part is also remarkably handy for starting party conversations that aren't banal. More importantly, this book may enable you to have some of the conversations you've never gotten around to with your loved ones. In summary, if you were to read only one self-knowledge book in a decade, I'd recommend "The Real You."

Rating:
Summary: Food for Thought
Review: The book provides a good basis for thinking about who you are and what you are looking for in life. Starting with personality theory, the author talks about the core personality traits of the 4 main personalities choleric, sanguine, melancholy, phlegmatic. Then moving to birth order, he talks about how we are influenced by our family, specifically the ways we learn to get attention. Then discussing childhood memories, he makes the point that our earliest memories are the story of who we are that has the most meaning to us - memories that we've subconsciouslly selected, perhaps even editted, that represent us and how we relate to the world. Lastly, Leman discusses love languages - how to understand what makes you feel loved, and how to let the people you love know you love them, in a way that means the most to them. So once you understand yourself, and know the kind of person to look for in a mate, you can keep the person you find!

This is a pretty good book. There are gaps, details that get missed, and some of the subjects he talks about really just give you enough information to get the gist of it, without too much detail. There are lots of examples to explain more what he means, but I found myself with a lot of questions. Yet, I would still recommend the book, and rated it 4 stars, because it covers the ideas it does present in a clear, understandable, readable way. The different parts of the book blend together well, and I found myself with a much stronger idea of who I am after reading this book and thinking about what it had to say.