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Rating: 
Summary: Groundbreaking reflections, uneven analysis
Review: It really was a compelling read, though somewhat uneven in its treatment of the issue. Some of what's in there is groundbreaking, at least for me. Some of it is shallow and poorly thought out. I found its acceptance of "men are just like this" to be a bit depressing at times. The message seemed to be "well, we MUST have men and men, mostly, can't change, so here's how you live with that". It would have been nice to have given more space to the notion of remaining single if you can't find a man with sufficient maturity and the ramifications of doing that. The fact that women "want" to get married does not really move it into the realm of the "gotta have", especially for Christians. I wonder if the idea of a large pool of single mature Christian women would make the target audience (or at least my assumption of the target audience, given that it's from NavPress) more than a little nervous. On the other hand, the examination of the issue of beauty as idolatry AND as a reflection of the health of our feminity was quite interesting and challenging to me. That's what you don't get from the secular books, such as Naomi Wolf. Feminists are a little touchy about turning the light of examination and analysis into our own souls sometimes and naming our own weaknesses. We want to see all women as Strong and Invincible (cue inspiring music)! Let's dissect Society instead (cue righteous indignation)! There is great value in what feminists have uncovered through this approach but there are definitely things we overlook. I also appreciated that they called men's search for the caveman ideal what it is...a caveman ideal. And said outright that men who are fixated on this lack maturity. That, yeah, you can want the caveman ideal but, c'mon guys, maybe you ought to consider the other aspects of what makes a good mate? I also appreciated their example of 40-something divorced men cruising the 20-something church singles groups and putting that in the light of "not so healthy". That is a depressingly common occurrence. It was new to me, too, to have this discussion take place with the language of evangelicals without resorting to proof-texting and while giving credit to some secular research (Naomi Wolf, predominantly). It's a shame they so quickly dismissed Nancy Friday's work because of her sexual activity. Evangelical Christian women have sexual needs and desires (and often history!) too, y'know. I suppose it's not really in keeping with their focus but I wish they had spent some time examining women's beauty ideals in men. The book spent quite a lot of pages detailing what men want. A lot of pages (I got the point after about 5 pages, they spent much more than that detailing it and detailing the why's). If you turned that around, what false ideals are women laboring under? What bodies are we looking for that reflect our immaturity? I'm having trouble thinking about the book as a whole because it was uneven in its writing and analysis but parts jump out of my imagination. I think I'll have to re-read it, highlighter in hand.
Rating:
Summary: Groundbreaking reflections, uneven analysis
Review: It really was a compelling read, though somewhat uneven in its treatment of the issue. Some of what's in there is groundbreaking, at least for me. Some of it is shallow and poorly thought out. I found its acceptance of "men are just like this" to be a bit depressing at times. The message seemed to be "well, we MUST have men and men, mostly, can't change, so here's how you live with that". It would have been nice to have given more space to the notion of remaining single if you can't find a man with sufficient maturity and the ramifications of doing that. The fact that women "want" to get married does not really move it into the realm of the "gotta have", especially for Christians. I wonder if the idea of a large pool of single mature Christian women would make the target audience (or at least my assumption of the target audience, given that it's from NavPress) more than a little nervous. On the other hand, the examination of the issue of beauty as idolatry AND as a reflection of the health of our feminity was quite interesting and challenging to me. That's what you don't get from the secular books, such as Naomi Wolf. Feminists are a little touchy about turning the light of examination and analysis into our own souls sometimes and naming our own weaknesses. We want to see all women as Strong and Invincible (cue inspiring music)! Let's dissect Society instead (cue righteous indignation)! There is great value in what feminists have uncovered through this approach but there are definitely things we overlook. I also appreciated that they called men's search for the caveman ideal what it is...a caveman ideal. And said outright that men who are fixated on this lack maturity. That, yeah, you can want the caveman ideal but, c'mon guys, maybe you ought to consider the other aspects of what makes a good mate? I also appreciated their example of 40-something divorced men cruising the 20-something church singles groups and putting that in the light of "not so healthy". That is a depressingly common occurrence. It was new to me, too, to have this discussion take place with the language of evangelicals without resorting to proof-texting and while giving credit to some secular research (Naomi Wolf, predominantly). It's a shame they so quickly dismissed Nancy Friday's work because of her sexual activity. Evangelical Christian women have sexual needs and desires (and often history!) too, y'know. I suppose it's not really in keeping with their focus but I wish they had spent some time examining women's beauty ideals in men. The book spent quite a lot of pages detailing what men want. A lot of pages (I got the point after about 5 pages, they spent much more than that detailing it and detailing the why's). If you turned that around, what false ideals are women laboring under? What bodies are we looking for that reflect our immaturity? I'm having trouble thinking about the book as a whole because it was uneven in its writing and analysis but parts jump out of my imagination. I think I'll have to re-read it, highlighter in hand.
Rating:
Summary: Important issue but this book falls short
Review: Since reading this book I've brought it up in many conversations and had several friends, both male and female, read it and give their opinions. The subject matter is important (the obsession with beauty is one of the great deceptions of our age) and I hadn't seen another book that dealt with it from a Christian perspective. In the end though, something didn't sit right. I've come to the conclusion that the questions raised are crucial, the diagnosis of the problem has wisdom, but the solutions presented fall short. One of my male friends thought this might be because the authors themselves are "recovering beauty queens" and didn't quite want to give up on the idea of physical beauty as something they can bring to God. Of course, the opposite idea--"God loves ugly people more"-- is just as ridiculous, and the book emphasizes that. The answer to both extremes is not a celebration of our unique God-given beauty, as they suggest; that is a prescription written out by secularism and shouldn't be spiritualized. Physical beauty isn't reflective of God's character any more than physical flaws reflect sin, as Jesus pointed out when asked about a crippled man. Otherwise Jesus himself, the image of the invisible God, would have been noted for being the most handsome man in Palestine. He was described in many ways but never that way! Eve, whose memory (according to the book) haunts us today in our feelings of how women should look, was perfect in intimacy with God and Adam before the Fall, but she is nowhere described as beautiful. She no doubt was, but the silence of the Scriptures on her physical characteristics should tell us something. The solution to beauty idolatry is radical discipleship to Christ where the very idea of "beauty" is turned upside down, along with power, love, and status, which the authors correctly identify as the true roots of beauty obsession. Dallas Willard addresses the issue neatly and powerfully in _The Divine Conspiracy_ (pp. 122-23, 210-11 and elsewhere). We do need to examine our thoughts on it, both women and men. Lee-Thorp and Hicks are brave in tackling an issue so subtle and emotional. They are thorough in exposing beauty obsession in modern culture (did you know the designer of Barbie unwittingly modeled her after a pornographic toy?) and the ways both men and women perpetuate it. This is a starting place, at least. However, as a solution they propose tinkering with our self-image and worldview, when what is really needed is new life and that abundantly!
Rating:
Summary: Okay but nothing special
Review: This book tackles a very complex subject. It's an interesting read and for that reason alone, I recommend it although some of it's conclusions were a bit of a stretch and superficial. Like someone already has said, their viewpoints on men and their attraction to beauty is basically, "Ladies, this is reality, this is how men are, this is how God made them, deal with it". Not very encouraging and a tad bit superficial and shallow if you ask me. But kudos to the authors for bringing this sensitive topic to light.
Rating:
Summary: Okay but nothing special
Review: This book tackles a very complex subject. It's an interesting read and for that reason alone, I recommend it although some of it's conclusions were a bit of a stretch and superficial. Like someone already has said, their viewpoints on men and their attraction to beauty is basically, "Ladies, this is reality, this is how men are, this is how God made them, deal with it". Not very encouraging and a tad bit superficial and shallow if you ask me. But kudos to the authors for bringing this sensitive topic to light.
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