Rating: 
Summary: We can make an covenant with our eyes
Review: As a man, just completing the book, "Every Man's Battle", I must assure all Christian men and women out there that this book is an excellent resource for Christian men, and for their wives to understand the battles we go through. It does not make us think that women have no battles of their own and as such Christian women should come out in counsel of the battle. However, this book is written for us, single and married men alike, to better understand ourselves, and whom we stand with in this battle. Sometimes I felt like Fred and Steve, and other times I raised my eyebrows at them. However, what I did feel was their honesty, and having had sessions with Christian men, I understand how powerful honesty is among men, that we can be open and free to speak about certain topics without fear of reproach. Like Job, and Fred, I too have now made that covenant with my eyes. I do it out of obedience to God and honour of my future wife. I applaud the openness in this book, and the faith I got in referring to the scriptures that I am not alone in this battle, and I can win the war ahead in my eyes, my mind and my heart. I really believed before that this was just a battle that I would have to live with. But I say thanks to Fred, Steve, Mike and Dan for putting this book together. I've shared the insights I've learned with many friends and have begun passing the book around to them, so they can learn and be encouraged. I must admit I've never heard of Fred Stoeker before, but he has gained my respect as a man of God who can stand on his sexual integrity and an excellent author and counsellor in his own right.
Rating: 
Summary: Disappointed
Review: I'll start by saying that I am a female, so here's an opinion from a woman's point of view. My husband and I ordered this book to read together - to help him become pure and to help me to understand some of what he goes through. I thought that the principles in this book were very good, especially the chapter on cherishing your wife :), and my husband gained some insight that he found really practical & helpful. However, we were both disappointed in the amount of time the author's spent in talking about their various temptations and how deep they got into the world of pornography/lust. I understand that they wanted men reading the book to relate and not feel alone, and to dispel some of the stigma surrounding the issue of lust, but I thought the descriptions of what they saw (from a graphic description of a female jogger in a bikini to constant detailed references to women's body parts) were just lusting in word form. It seemed to me that the men in this book changed their actions, but never changed their hearts. They may not lust openly anymore, but they still seem to not respect women very much - I felt like a body part while reading the book. My husband was disappointed, he said he enjoyed parts of the book, but other parts brought to mind exactly what he's been trying to get away from.
I guess reading this book is better than not doing anything, but I reccommend Randy Alcorn's The Purity Principle instead - an amazing little book that helped my husband and I tremendously.
Rating:
Summary: Great Illustrations and Great Advice
Review: The authors had to illustrate scenarios so that I could relate to them. There are three defenses they suggest that men must use to control lustful desires. We men are accountable for what enters our eyes, mind and heart. The authors reinforce these steps with Scripture quotations. Rest assured there is a natural flow of progression to this book. The book identifies the temptation, addresses the impact of the temptation and then tells how to manage this temptation to not only better yourself, but, at a minimum, educate the next generation after you. Our society is inundated with sexual images that are designed to sell and persuade by making us think of women as objects. The book points out the effect on men of passive and suggestive sensual images. We, as a society, have become accustomed to seeing such display and accept it as commonplace. Basically we are not even aware of how many sexual images and situations we are exposed to in any given day (i.e. billboards, TV, co-workers, etc.) By training the eyes, mind and heart to follow the teachings of Christ, your Christian relationship and fulfilling sex life with your mate will automatically improve. I have made this book a living document. I highlighted key phrases and journaled in the margins. I have already seen immediate results and feel more liberated that all of my sensual thoughts are now focused on my wife. Application of this book is key! If you find yourself looking (or even staring at women) and imagining lustful thoughts or you are looking at pornography and want to arm yourself with the word of God to protect yourself, then this book is for you.
Rating:
Summary: We can make an covenant with our eyes
Review: As a man, just completing the book, "Every Man's Battle", I must assure all Christian men and women out there that this book is an excellent resource for Christian men, and for their wives to understand the battles we go through. It does not make us think that women have no battles of their own and as such Christian women should come out in counsel of the battle. However, this book is written for us, single and married men alike, to better understand ourselves, and whom we stand with in this battle. Sometimes I felt like Fred and Steve, and other times I raised my eyebrows at them. However, what I did feel was their honesty, and having had sessions with Christian men, I understand how powerful honesty is among men, that we can be open and free to speak about certain topics without fear of reproach. Like Job, and Fred, I too have now made that covenant with my eyes. I do it out of obedience to God and honour of my future wife. I applaud the openness in this book, and the faith I got in referring to the scriptures that I am not alone in this battle, and I can win the war ahead in my eyes, my mind and my heart. I really believed before that this was just a battle that I would have to live with. But I say thanks to Fred, Steve, Mike and Dan for putting this book together. I've shared the insights I've learned with many friends and have begun passing the book around to them, so they can learn and be encouraged. I must admit I've never heard of Fred Stoeker before, but he has gained my respect as a man of God who can stand on his sexual integrity and an excellent author and counsellor in his own right.
Rating:
Summary: A Woman's Point of View
Review: I read this book to help support my fiancee who is struggling with sexual addiction. I had heard the quip "All men a perverts and all women are nieve to the fact" before, but I didn't realize how much of a spiritual burden this is to them. This book has helped to open my eyes to the struggle he is going through, and what I can do to help him as well as the male population in general...modest dress, choosing movies and music with wisdom, and fervent prayer. I was somewhat disappointed with the women in the book, however. All of them had very negative reactions to the sin...which is appropiate. However, there also seemed to a very strong pattern of anger and judgement. That was the disappointing part. I felt more sorrow than anger, and I know that there are godly women out there who share my reaction. I guess my only complaint is that the women's section was too general and didn't allow for a wide variety of women's reactions.There are godly women out there who want to help you in the battle and will do so with honesty and maturity, but will allow you to fight the battle that only you, as a man, can truly understand. Over all, this book has been extremely helpful in teaching both my fiancee and I of an effective battle plan to deal with sexual addiction in our relationship and giving us a glimps of the victory that the Lord has for us. Men of God...you are in my prayers.
Rating:
Summary: Very Helpful
Review: This book made much sense. I'm getting married soon, so it came to me in a timely manner, after finishing reading it. The rest of my bible study group liked it and found it helpful, as we are getting accountability partners. God made marriage a special gift and wants all of us to be pure to our wives. It's hard to be perfect in that way, due to the sensual images on the Web (pop-ups, dating service ads showing pictures of attractive women, weight-loss ads showing women's thin tummies), Billboards, co-workers, female runners at races. But I believe men can work harder towards God's standard by bouncing our eyes, and systematically tuning out the images in our minds, and cherishing the wife. And I believe this is helpful, and not legalistic. Thanks Fred, Steven, Mike!
Rating:
Summary: Women Can be Tempted Also
Review: The usual excuse that men don't get enough sex at home is usually not true! They usually get plenty, and as much as they want. They simply prefer variety as the healthy males they are. However, women are subject to the same "temptations" and generally control themselves, partly because society has chosen to condemn them if they are prone to wander. So women either get passionate hostility from their husbands, or from society, or both, unlike men. Why either society or their husbands imagine they would or could not be interested in another man, or in being adulterous, is a mystery no one seems free to discuss, much less accept. In fact, there are many women who do not get enough sex, or the type of sex they might like to have. Yet, their requirement is absolute abstention while men are accorded the privilege of "falling." Temptations are rarely a problem if marriages are solid and both cultivate that stability. When they don't, either may stray, and perhaps, should stray since straying is a signal only of illness in the marriage because of lack of self discipline, and self control. People either exercise it or they do not. Suggesting that men are unable to control their sexual appetites, or their desire for variety (assuming they will not get in trouble for it) shortchanges men of high morals, and honest commitment - either present or not. Plenty of men "made do" with one woman, and are proud and appreciative of having her, and the same goes for women. Simply because one person finds another attractive does not mean they must, or they should, or they will allow themselves to give into the temptations of others. By and large, only juvenile personalities are inclined to exonerate themselves, or expect that they will be forgiven. Much of the value of a marriage is bound into the level of commitment stuck to, not offered as rhetoric, and most women are aware of that fact. The commitment always begins at home, and stays there unless there are other personality problems through which people rationalize that it's too inconvenient not to. Hence, it is not the adultery that is the problem; it is the marriage for either straying partner.
Rating:
Summary: I changed my life around.
Review: I'm not going to say this book has all the answers. It is good to keep a covenant with your eyes; to start out small and make conscious efforts to stay away from sexual temptation. Several people wrote this book was artificial and not helpful. I believe the book is helpful, but only because I read it and prayed with God about it every day. God created a change in me and I was able to give up pornography. I don't believe there's an easy solution, because this problem is ongoing. I recommend having prayer each day with your lesson, and seeking God's will. This book may not be for everyone, but I was able to read this when it was time to give up my sinful ways. I still struggle, but that is only a struggle I have by not staying close to God in my walk every day. You can't blame the book for not helping you... you must seek out the Lord and he will give you the help and resources you need. I would recommend joining a men only small group, or starting one if you don't have one already. Accountability with people like you is a positive factor in fighting the battle against sexual temptation.
Rating:
Summary: Artificial and formulaic
Review: Thanks to the authors for their work in tackling this very important topic. However, their solutions are so simplistic and artifical, giving simple formulas that don't go anywhere near the real causes of lust, or true ways to combat the real problems. For instance: The major way a man should combat lust is to have regular intercourse with his wife. And if a man is single? The solution to lust that they offer for single men (I'm not making this up) is simply to have more nocturnal emissions. These kind of artifical solutions simply don't go anywhere near where the real battle needs to be fought.
Rating:
Summary: It takes Time
Review: Some have written about this book that it's crap, leagalistic, and takes God out of the picture. In my life I was once a member of the fast lane and when I got save I had to deal with the consequences of living that life. This is not a get fixed quick book at all, and if you look at this self-help step book you are in the wrong place. When you apply this book to your life you are not trying to handle this "all by yourself", but you are giving God an opportunity to work on your heart through these steps. The authors never say it will be easy, never take God out of the equation (to them God is the equation), and say it will take months for these steps to penitrate your heart. I have had this book for two years and always go back to it. Sexual Purity is not a condition we overcome and that's it, but a daily humbling to God admitting we are a sinner.
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