What's That Smell?" (Oh It's Me.): 50 Mortifying Situations and How to Deal

Rating:
Summary: Maybe Tucker Shaw is a
Review: All hail the Alloy Books. Yes, thanks to the Alloy, Inc. Company (the fine group that brought you such memorable titles as "this book is about sex" and "My Mom Reads My E-mail, A Loser's Trying To Hook Up With Me, I Just Kissed My Best Friend's Boyfriend, And My Life Basically Sucks...Any Advice?") comes the newest l'il ole teen advice book to hit the market. Of course, like its fellow Alloy brethren, "What's That Smell" has the fine distinction of being written by an adult in a teen-like voice. This is alternately painful and downright hilarious depending on what kind of mood you're in when you read it. Though much of this book is simply info aimed at white suburban kids with comfortable lives, slices of actual honest-to-god useful facts sometimes manage weasel through the treacle and slang. Though I was less than impressed (in spite of the fact that I knew perfectly well what I was getting into when I picked up the publication) in the end this tale is just another collection of goody two shoe messages masquerading as a naughty advice book.

The publication begins by clearly stating that this is NOT a self-help book. Author Tucker Shaw claims that this book was not written to, "teach you how to feel good about yourself, how to make the most of your future, and how to get and keep friends". And here we find the first, but not the last, of Mr. Shaw's many lies. This is, in fact, EXACTLY what this book strives to do in between tales of parents, puberty, and parties (gone awry). Each chapter is one of fifty mortifying situations and the different ways in which a person can get out of them. As the book itself admits, the situations discussed here are strictly PG-13. Therefore, you may find information on how to handle a situation in which you're caught shoplifting or your parent finds your birth control, but you will not locate situations in which people are caught in compromising situations or what to do when your parents find your bong. In fact, the book actively advises the reader on some situations in a tone that verges on the preachy. Teens (and I tend to agree with this, but I think any kid who reads this book should know what the text boils down to) should not drink, or smoke, or do drugs, or shoplift, or pleasure themselves in their cars.

Now, the sad thing about this book, to my mind, is its publication date. Observe. Though it came out in 2003, "What's That Smell" has already become dated less than year after its original publication. This is entirely due to its bizarre belief that NSYNC is cool. I kid you not. There were at least 2 instances within the text of NSYNC being mentioned with the word, "Sucks" or its equivalent never coming up. Look, I'll level with you. I am not a teen. I'm 26 years old, dangerously nearing the old fogy period of my life and even I know that NSYNC are, at this point in time, ranked in coolness somewhere above Bananaramma and somewhere below potato soup. Then there's the problem I mentioned earlier concerning slang. Tucker Shaw (who I suspect probably remembers the Korean War for all that he thinks he's in touch with teens) uses the following terms in this book: ill, (as in, some consequences are going to be "ill"), mad guts, your 'hood, and (believe it or not) psych. I especially liked the portion on getting arrested. Apparently, the only situation in which this would be acceptable is one in which you join a World Bank/human rights protest, "notwithstanding the fact that you have no clue what the issues involved are", to attract the attention of an activist. Apparently the only time teens are politically active is when they're attempting to nab a mate. Huh? Which teens does Tucker know? I'm sorry, but give this age group a little more credit. Believe it or not, some teenagers really do care about world issues. Geesh...

In an especially odd move, the book attempts to be gender neutral (as well as sexual preference neutral, which I appreciated). Therefore, all mentions of significant others are accompanied by roughly twenty him/hers. This can get old, real fast. The illustrations riddling the text have as many male characters in embarrassing situations as female characters, so well done there.

The book's good advice: Telling teens that their friends will be far more interested in their crushes than their significant others. Informing them that you should NEVER meet the person you met online (priceless info that I doubt they'll listen to). The portion on personal hygiene is on track, for the most part. And to give credit where credit is due the book does encourage going to college, not "borrowing" your parents' car, the aforementioned anti-smoking understanding, etc.

Am I asking too much of a book for teens? This isn't exactly deep literature here, and the author wrote with an appropriately fluffy mindset from the start. Just the same, I think my real objections to "What's That Smell?" have to do with how stupid the book seems to think teens really are. First of all, within one year, half the slang written here will be outdated or indecipherable. Second of all, it seems to think that all teens (at least the ones purchasing books like this) are politically idiotic, vengeful, shallow-brained members of the high school elite. Aside from giving the more intelligent kids a complex, it's just a poor way to write a book. But what am I saying? Why should I complain? In no time at all books like this one will litter the dumpsters and dusty corners of bedrooms without a second thought. I suggest you skip giving this text a first thought as well.

Rating:
Summary: Maybe Tucker Shaw is a pen name
Review: All hail the Alloy Books. Yes, thanks to the Alloy, Inc. Company (the fine group that brought you such memorable titles as "this book is about sex" and "My Mom Reads My E-mail, A Loser's Trying To Hook Up With Me, I Just Kissed My Best Friend's Boyfriend, And My Life Basically Sucks...Any Advice?") comes the newest l'il ole teen advice book to hit the market. Of course, like its fellow Alloy brethren, "What's That Smell" has the fine distinction of being written by an adult in a teen-like voice. This is alternately painful and downright hilarious depending on what kind of mood you're in when you read it. Though much of this book is simply info aimed at white suburban kids with comfortable lives, slices of actual honest-to-god useful facts sometimes manage weasel through the treacle and slang. Though I was less than impressed (in spite of the fact that I knew perfectly well what I was getting into when I picked up the publication) in the end this tale is just another collection of goody two shoe messages masquerading as a naughty advice book.

The publication begins by clearly stating that this is NOT a self-help book. Author Tucker Shaw claims that this book was not written to, "teach you how to feel good about yourself, how to make the most of your future, and how to get and keep friends". And here we find the first, but not the last, of Mr. Shaw's many lies. This is, in fact, EXACTLY what this book strives to do in between tales of parents, puberty, and parties (gone awry). Each chapter is one of fifty mortifying situations and the different ways in which a person can get out of them. As the book itself admits, the situations discussed here are strictly PG-13. Therefore, you may find information on how to handle a situation in which you're caught shoplifting or your parent finds your birth control, but you will not locate situations in which people are caught in compromising situations or what to do when your parents find your bong. In fact, the book actively advises the reader on some situations in a tone that verges on the preachy. Teens (and I tend to agree with this, but I think any kid who reads this book should know what the text boils down to) should not drink, or smoke, or do drugs, or shoplift, or pleasure themselves in their cars.

Now, the sad thing about this book, to my mind, is its publication date. Observe. Though it came out in 2003, "What's That Smell" has already become dated less than year after its original publication. This is entirely due to its bizarre belief that NSYNC is cool. I kid you not. There were at least 2 instances within the text of NSYNC being mentioned with the word, "Sucks" or its equivalent never coming up. Look, I'll level with you. I am not a teen. I'm 26 years old, dangerously nearing the old fogy period of my life and even I know that NSYNC are, at this point in time, ranked in coolness somewhere above Bananaramma and somewhere below potato soup. Then there's the problem I mentioned earlier concerning slang. Tucker Shaw (who I suspect probably remembers the Korean War for all that he thinks he's in touch with teens) uses the following terms in this book: ill, (as in, some consequences are going to be "ill"), mad guts, your 'hood, and (believe it or not) psych. I especially liked the portion on getting arrested. Apparently, the only situation in which this would be acceptable is one in which you join a World Bank/human rights protest, "notwithstanding the fact that you have no clue what the issues involved are", to attract the attention of an activist. Apparently the only time teens are politically active is when they're attempting to nab a mate. Huh? Which teens does Tucker know? I'm sorry, but give this age group a little more credit. Believe it or not, some teenagers really do care about world issues. Geesh...

In an especially odd move, the book attempts to be gender neutral (as well as sexual preference neutral, which I appreciated). Therefore, all mentions of significant others are accompanied by roughly twenty him/hers. This can get old, real fast. The illustrations riddling the text have as many male characters in embarrassing situations as female characters, so well done there.

The book's good advice: Telling teens that their friends will be far more interested in their crushes than their significant others. Informing them that you should NEVER meet the person you met online (priceless info that I doubt they'll listen to). The portion on personal hygiene is on track, for the most part. And to give credit where credit is due the book does encourage going to college, not "borrowing" your parents' car, the aforementioned anti-smoking understanding, etc.

Am I asking too much of a book for teens? This isn't exactly deep literature here, and the author wrote with an appropriately fluffy mindset from the start. Just the same, I think my real objections to "What's That Smell?" have to do with how stupid the book seems to think teens really are. First of all, within one year, half the slang written here will be outdated or indecipherable. Second of all, it seems to think that all teens (at least the ones purchasing books like this) are politically idiotic, vengeful, shallow-brained members of the high school elite. Aside from giving the more intelligent kids a complex, it's just a poor way to write a book. But what am I saying? Why should I complain? In no time at all books like this one will litter the dumpsters and dusty corners of bedrooms without a second thought. I suggest you skip giving this text a first thought as well.

Rating:
Summary: Shocking & Irresponsible
Review: I came across this book sitting on my coffee table, being left there by my 13 year old. He bought it at a school book fair. I tried to see the "good advice" in this book and just didn't find any. It seems to me that it is mostly how to put one over on your parents and other adults.

Rating:
Summary: That Smell Is Coming From The Advice...
Review: This book has some very good points. The situations are definitely ones that we all have had to deal with on one level or another. The advice stops being good advice, however, when it condones sneaking and lying to parents, and being nasty to stepsiblings and stepparents. Is this advice we really want to pass on to any generation? I thought I was being an over reactive adult up until my daughter and I discussed the content. Needless to say, my teenage son hasn't gotten to read this book. Yet. I hope.