Rating: 
Summary: Secret ceremonies or boring redundant whining?
Review: I was very disappointed in this book. Not being a Mormon, I was expecting to be enlightened to the secret ceremonies of the Mormon wife, instead I was led through a very boring journey of the author's disatisfied sex life and how she dealt with her personal problem. The book has very little to do with what the title suggests. It's simply the author's very self-indulgent vehicle to spill her own indiscrete secrets without giving much thought to what the reader picked up the book for in the first place.
If you're interested in reading about the Mormon lifestyle, this book is definitely a let down.
Rating: 
Summary: Compelling Look at American Collectivism
Review: D. Laake's views are refreshingly mature and self-possessed. In reading the reviews I note that people from the intermountain west are more likely to believe her than people from places like New Jersey, who don't understand that Laake's "Mental illnesses" are the result of individualism struggling against a culture in which individuals mean precisely nothing. Americans don't realize in general how different "Mormon culture" is in that regard, since they don't spend half of their freetime spinning in the rinse cycle of some impersonal propaganda machine, as typical Mormons do. Most couldn't stand it for six months, let alone for decades and still retain enough distance to write a book like this. It doesn't have too many salacious secrets, for the good reason that D. Lake didn't know many, and neither do most Mormons. To the tut-tutters: what other Americans would pay 10%-20% of their pretax income to an organization that doesn't account for how it is spent? Interesting book, and a fascinating look at a pre-modern way of life that few of us feel close to, but which is similar to Islam extremism and other modern communitarian theocracies in the third world.
Rating: 
Summary: Does not reveal "secrets" and is sensationalist
Review: I picked this book randomly off a bookshelf in the Women's Studies section of a Barnes and Noble a few years ago. I thought it would reveal shocking secrects of the Mormon church as the cover promised.It did no such thing. I will admit that Laake described some practices and beliefs that were "different" and definitely not mainstream, but not at all shocking. I think she overdramatized the religious aspects. I expected to read something about secret sexual ceremonies in the temple or something criminal. Laake's personal behavior is far more shocking than the "secrets" of the Mormon church she reveals. I disagree with Laake blaming all her problems on the Mormon church. First, she is mentally ill. Her behavior is so clearly obsessive-complusive. She obviously made bad choices; her first bad choice was marrying someone she didn't know. Having an affair was also another bad choice. I think Laake needs to take responsibility for her bad choices and stop blaming others for her mistakes. Second, I am not impressed by her assumption that all male Mormons are a certain stereotypical way or that all members of the church were antagnonistic to her (paranoia from her mental disorder perhaps?). This is just plain stupid. I've met all kinds of jerks in my life, male and female from varying religious persuasions. Laake's first husband was a jerk. He would have been a jerk whether he was atheist, Jewish, Catholic, or Buddhist--and I'm sure he would have abused the doctrine of any of these to his own advantage. Abusive people are present in all aspects of society and not one. It is erroneous for Laake to present the Mormon church as responsible for her husband's behavior and attitudes. Don't waste your time and money on this book. It is not as sensationalist as the cover would have you believe in respect to the discussion of the "secrets" of the Mormon church. It is sensationalist in its revelations about Laake's sexual habits--so it might be worth your while if you like reading about bi-polar women and their sexual aclivities. Personally, I was bored reading about her masturbation (another sign of obsessive-compulsive personality).
Rating: 
Summary: ex-mormon must read
Review: I felt that the book was exceptional. I do however realize that the book may not hold the same message to non-Mormons or even Mormons outside of the sate of Utah as it did with others or myself. Some of the reviews state that Deborah should have been more accountable for her actions. I tend to always agree with this statement for all people, however I really didn't feel that she was trying to blame anyone, or play a victim. To me her story was more about the experiences she had while a member and the persecution she went through after the book was published. She openly admits to her mistakes with marriage. However the LDS church is a very controlling religion, I believe the book illustrates that in many examples. The manner in which the church promotes marriage is very powerful and can be very dangerous. I felt when reading this book that I reading the stories of many of my very close female friends and even as a man I could relate in a very intimate way. I think the book can help those that have left the LDS church who "feel the lie" and hold remorse for those who can't.
Rating:
Summary: Blaming Religion for Your Mistakes
Review: Laake blames all of her experiences in life on her religious upbringing. She marries, not once but 3 times, men that she doesn't love and wonders why her marriages don't work. She and her first husband reuse condoms, certainly not typical of anyone. She makes really bad choices that she then blames on religion. She blames religion for her mental illness, her poor self esteem, her fascination with masturbation, her unhappiness, and her lack of ambition as a young woman. She seems to feel that it is unrealistic for God and organized religion to expect fidelity in marriage, adherance to accepted doctrine, and a certain standard of behavior. Didn't God give us ten commandments? I don't remember Him taking any of them back or saying If it feels good do it. Her depiction of Mormonism is extremely skewed and one-sided. This book is far from an objective view of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints and I believe it to be an extremely inaccurate one. I don't think it really matters what religion Ms. Laake was raised in, the experiences she recounts whether real or imagined are not typical of anyone, anywhere.
Rating:
Summary: A View Of Mormonism The Blind Sheep Will Object To
Review: This book presents a lot of very interesting and typical experiences encountered in the culture of Mormonism. Many reviewers are angry at the author, because they don't like her perspective. After all, anyone who does not share their beliefs undermines their faith, which is carefully held together by a network of fellow believers and faith-promoting experiences and feelings, driven by a mythological history of the church and self-proclaimed gospel. Most are sincere, but are also programmed to avoid any opposing views, which are always dismissed as "persecution" and lies. The attitudes described by the author are typical, I know. I was a faithful missionary(unlike many of my cohorts) and long-time faithful mormon. I related to many of the author's experiences and perspectives, even though I am male and had a somewhat different experience. I can verify encountering many of the same types of experiences and similar people. The author had some mental problems, and one could argue whether her mormon experiences contributed or not, but her mental illness does not make her experiences any less valid. You can disagree with her perspective, but to condemn her because she does not share your faith is both arrogant and immature. Their are many perspectives on mormonism, and they are not all bad, but this book provides one valuable one.
Rating:
Summary: Objectivity
Review: I enjoyed reading this account of the author's experience as a woman in the 'LDS culture'. I believe the author was successful at being objective as I had anticipated she might write her acounts with angry undertones. This did not occur. I also appreciated her update of changes in the end of the book.
Rating:
Summary: Let down in Denver
Review: I am a non-Mormon, but have many LDS friends. I have total respect for people of the Mormon faith, of any faith! It is not my place to judge. This book is an easy read, and doesn't really give an entire picture so that the readers can judge freely. I feel like Ms. Laake has betrayed the trust of the people of her former church. There is nothing wrong with having "secret ceremonies" or alternative beliefs. But, Ms. Laake, in trying to get us to feel sorry for her, or turn a profit on book sales, by being a big mouth. This book is not a very good read. It is repetitive, and by the time she cheats on her second husband with a brother from her ward, becomes boring. By the end, she strikes me as unbalanced and lonely. If you read this book, do not take it as the only way the Mormon culture lives. Even though there are unique aspects to the LDS community, there is a great deal of beauty, morality and love too. Take a step away from the propaganda (this book) and check out the LDS church from a different angle. Tolerence is a good thing.
Rating:
Summary: Fascinating...true courage!
Review: Next time a person from the Morman church knocks on your door, you may want to think twice! This is a fascinating story of woman brought up as a "true believer." It details how the Morman religion impacted her life in some incredible and bizarre ways. It took Ms. Laake tremendous courage to tell her story. When I tried to discuss this book with missionaries, they refused! Praise for Ms. Laake for breaking the silence and telling it like it is! If you read this book and enjoy it as much as I did, try reading The Mormon Murders by Steven Naifeh and Gregory Smith. Wait til you read about Mark Hofmann and how he sold the Mormon church fake documents that they kept hidden away. A compelling true story of greed, forgery, deceit, and death.
Rating: 
Summary: I Agree With "Quit Whinning"
Review: I don't pretend to know about or even have anything other than curiosity about the Mormons. In fact, when the "men in black" are on the street, I'm the first to call neighbors and friends telling them not to answer their doors, "they're back"! However, I feel that perhaps the group received the blame for Miss Laake's mental illness unjustifiably. She is obviously a person with deep emotional problems that probably would have surfaced no matter what religion she was born to. As a matter of fact, she make's it clear in her closing statements that she doesn't believe in any religious "dogma", calling it all a "lie". It seems that she is still afraid of anyone or anything making demands of her. That's fine, but don't blame religion. I found the beginning of her story interesting though I'm not sure I believe some of it. Miss Laake is a compelling writer, I couldn't put the book down. But, after reading about the failure of her second marriage and her absolute addiction to sexual self-gratification, she lost my sympathy. Let's face it, lots of people don't like being the religion they are born to and hardly make the mess of their lives that this woman did. Since, she still is in contact with so many "liberal Mormans", "half Mormans", "conservative Mormans" and "ex-Mormans". I can only assume that she herself is still trying to fit in to the group. By the back door if necessary. I would suggest she either continue with or find therapy, she is far from "cured". I would recommend this book to any looking for an easy book to read with a curiosity of the Mormon culture. But I would caution them not to take it as absolute truth. Remember, the woman who wrote it is still searching for mental health. By the way, I'm a Roman Catholic, and far from being close to switching to what I personally consider a cult. But, I still say they got a "bum rap".
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