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Rating:  Summary: Don't judge this book by it's title Review: Although it's easy to have a knee-jerk reaction to the title, try to be open minded, there is a lot of value in this well-written book. Doyle promotes women being the boss at work and equal pay for equal work. This book is specifically about women trying to find intimacy in marriage, based on her experience. The author clearly states that surrendered does not mean submissive or silent. A surrendered wife cleanly expresses how SHE feels and what SHE wants instead of trying to control her husband. Surrendering is coming to terms with reality--that YOU are the only one YOU can change. Doyle gives practical tips and tools for replacing critical, controlling, or nagging behavior with respect, trust and gratitude. (Criticism does have a chilling effect on intimacy.) Like the serenity prayer says, God grant me the courage to change what I can(me), to accept what I cannot change(him), and the wisdom to know the difference (between him & me). If you are interested in finding more intimacy in your marriage (remember the man who wooed you and you married?), take the challenge to read TSW, and really listen and think about these ideas. Note: If your spouse is an alcoholic, a drug/gambling addict, physically abusive or incapable of being faithful, Doyle doesn't advise surrendering.
Rating:  Summary: It works when you try it.... Review: I always hated those smug happy couples. You know the ones. But then I met my husband, and a lot of things changed for me. He is such a wonderful man, and I had such a terrible history with relationships; I wanted to find a way to preserve this happiness. I also had the additional problem of his ex-wife being very emasculating, and his self-esteem was low. Having heard so many horror stories of marriages beginning blissfully enough but ultimately descending to utter failure, I was looking for some reasonable advice that would give me some kind of control over that. I stumbled upon this book and found that instinctively, I was doing many of these things. When you love a man, you are always more feminine. Her book helped to clarify why I was feeling compelled to act this way, and had many good suggestions for maintaining this in the long term. No one can ever convince me that I am doing the wrong thing. My husband is a truly remarkable man who takes incredibly good care of me, our respective children and our home, while still being as romantic and tender as he was in the beginning. In fact, it has only gotten better as I have learned to be more consistent, and he has learned that I trust him completely to be the man he naturally is. I cannot overemphasize how happy and successful we are as a couple, *especially* through the hard times. This is what Laura Doyle is trying to say, and once you understand that in your gut, the suggestions aren't threatening at all. I can't imagine a married woman not wanting this kind of happiness. Once things start working for you, it doesn't seem hard at all.
Rating:  Summary: Marital Peace indeed, but at what price?! Review: I bought this book from an airport bookshop, because of its catchy title and I read most of it on my long flight. It was obviously an easy read and I found it to be quite "amusing"! This book would have been far more helpful to many more couples if it addressed both men and women. So a better book would have been: The Surrendered Partner: A Practical Guide to Finding Intimacy, Passion, and Peace in your marriage In many marriages it's the man who is controlling rather than the woman, and a marriage based on mutual trust and respect is certainly much healthier than one based on nagging, controlling and criticizing your partner. Many times if one wants change one should start with oneself, and this applies to both wives and husbands. The concept that it's entirely up to the wife to fix the marriage and that women should play the role of "doll" rather than the role of " partner", is certainly flawed. . However, I have to admit that the 8 hours I spent on this book were of some use. I tried to be less critical and more encouraging of my husband and after sometime I found that he started to be less critical and more encouraging to me. I hated handling the budget, not that I was not doing a good job, and for a long time hesitated to ask my husband to take over. This book made me insist that it was finally his turn (neither of us likes budgeting!) Oh that was such a relief! So reading this book, in a very strange way has improved my marriage and my life! However I am certain that there must me more balanced relationship books out there, so look around before buying this one!
Rating:  Summary: Can you imagine Ginger Rogers trying to lead Fred Asteire? Review: This is an excelent book, being christian, having a 10 year marriage and being a Mars Venus facilitator, I can tell you that if you apply the concepts in this book you will be one happy, very happy woman. The idea is that the more you want to control (your man/your marriage/the finances, etc) the more stressed, overwhelmed and lonely you end. It teaches you to let your husband do what Fred Asteire did with Ginger Rogers: he led her through the dance floor. She didn't fight him or tried to led herself. She trusted him, she trusted that he would make her look awesome and would take care of her. That is the idea. To make him responsible, to trust him, so we women can lay back and relax. Let him be in charge and enjoy. You see, women feel loved when they are cared for. Men feel loved when they are trusted. So if you surrender (and by this the author doesn't mean let him abuse) he will lovingly take care of you and he will feel trusted and loved. I really encourage all women to read the book and give it a try. You will be amazed.
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