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Summary: Skills we already know but may take for granted...
Review: This book really stresses mainly on the psychology of people and how we interact and respond to each other. This will give you the knowledge how to improve in business relationships, improve yourself as a whole person or to manage people in general. Some of the theory described is how we should remember others' names, talk in terms of their interests, let the other person think the idea is his, and most importantly always allow the other person to save face. Promoting understanding other peoples behavior and this may have very positive effect of reducing day-to-day conflict.
Some of the book may come off as Phony, but I think it is how you read it. You are not being phony if you apply this in your life if you truly do care about other people. I have heard a lot about this book and read all the reviews. This is certainly a book that you cannot take what other people have to say, you need to read it and then judge for yourself.
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Summary: Old School, No New School
Review: The book is extremely outdated, simple minded, and misleading. 1. Our modern society is suspicious of transparent persuasion. The environment of sales and matters of business rewards experienced suspicion. SUGGESTION: Recognize that societies are more sophisticated. 2. The author expects assumptions to be correct. This can be fatal. A person's motivations can be estimated and modeled. They are not black and white. They are complex. Most of all, maneuvering your intensions against all-too-often misjudged motivations will show a grave misunderstanding of human behavior, much less be successful. SUGGESTION: Recognize that individuals are more complex. 3. I can respect that this may be outside the scope of this book, but there are no cultural considerations. We live in larger, more diverse world with vast levels of communication. Social, political, business, and racial cultural considerations (motivations) must govern over the form, content, and context of human relations. SUGGESTION: Recognize cultural considerations. 4. The narrative style of this book is counter productive. Spoon feeding tailor made anecdotes and cute stories is insulting. A more mature and sophisticated format would be more effective. SUGGESTION: Recognize a more knowledgeable audience. Granted, the nine principles presented are decent in the general sense and application. P.S. If you are Old School, this is the way to go.
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Summary: I still smile when I think back...
Review: Actually...
There are only 4 kinds of people who need to read this book. 1) Those that are married need to read it
2) Obviously parents need to read this too
3) Any person with a job
4) Anybody who's unemployed and looking for a job Other than that (if you don't fall into one of those categories) you probably don't need to read this book. In fact after reading it myself I only came away with a few positive byproducts. One was happiness (that's all) the other was a basic understanding of the human being (probably not that important) Decide for yourself, after all [$$$] is a high price to pay for only two good things...
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Summary: Must Read!
Review: Everyone, I mean everyone should read this book!
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Summary: Best Communication Skills mastering book ever
Review: A Truly amazing book, you will simply wont need to take any more courses or read books about communication after reading this. Not only will it help you in communicating and negotiating more effectively, but you will enjoy your time reading it with all real life examples and stories. I've prepared a summary for my daily reference, I believe you will benefit from it too: PART I
Fundamental Techniques in Handling People:
1. Don't Criticize, condemn or complain
2. Give honest and sincere appreciation
3. Arouse in the other person an eager want PART II
Principles of making people like you
1. Become genuinely interested in the other people.
2. Smile
3. Remember that a person's name is to that person the sweetest and most important sound in any language, so remember names
4. Be a good listener. Encourage others to talk about themselves
5. Talk in terms of the other person's interests
6. Make the other person feel important- and do it sincerely PART III Principles for winning people to your way of thinking
1. The only way to get the best of an argument is to avoid it.
2. Show respect for the other person's opinions, never say, "you are wronge"
3. If you are wrong admit it quickly and emphatically
4. Begin in a friendly way
5. Get the other person saying "yes, yes" immediately by asking them questions that they would probably answer by yes.
6. Let the other person do a great deal of the talking
7. Let the other person feel that the idea is his or hers
8. Try honestly to see things from the other person's point of view.
9. Be sympathetic with the other person's ideas and desires
10. Appeal to the nobler motives like saying: As a gentleman who is known for his kindness, I believe you would do this or that.
11. Dramatize your ideas, use visual aids.
12. Throw down a challenge, I know you are capable of doing this or that. PART IV
Be a leader, how to change people without arousing resentment
1. Begin with a praise and honest appreciation
2. Call attention to people's mistakes indirectly
3. Talk about your mistakes before criticizing the other person
4. Ask question instead of giving direct orders. Like what do you think about doing this or that, instead of saying do this or don't do that.
5. Let the other person save face
6. Praise the slightest improvement and praise every improvement.
7. Give the other person a fine reputation to live up to.
8. Use encouragement. Make the fault seem easy to correct
9. Make the other person happy about doing the think you suggest
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Summary: A timeless resource for human relationships
Review: Dale Carnegie understood the elements of healthy relationships and teaches us skills to develop them with timeless examples. My dad told me to read this book when I was a teenager, and it really worked for me. I have read it 4 or 5 times. If your realtionship are not what you would like them to be, you must read this book. I recently read Optimal Thinking-How to be your best self by Rosalene Glickman, another timeless resource(recently written), which shows you how to be your best and bring out the best from others no matter what you are facing. Both of these books are easy to read, so don't procrastinate, buy them and make the most of yourself, your relationships and your life.
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Summary: The success of these techniques depends on your intentions
Review: HOW TO WIN FRIENDS AND INFLUENCE PEOPLE is founded on the theory that everyone longs to feel important. Others are not interested in me. They are interested in themselves. Mr. Carnegie then expounds on this theory, describing how we should remember others' names, talk in terms of others' interests, let the other person think the idea was his, and always allow the other person to save face. The reason this all seemed phoney to me at first is because I had spent most of my childhood and teen years in a business that often contradicts each of these principles: show business. The performer's job is to make others interested in the performer. But making others interested in oneself is very stressful. It requires constant revision and search for what's new on the horizon. Fashions change; the latest music genre often becomes a laughing stock to the next generation. Styles become passé. Audiences' tastes shift from season to season. But Carnegie has identified one thing that has never changed throughout all of human history: the individual's desire to be important, the fact that the individual is more interested in himself than anyone else. After years of struggling with this book, I finally realize that, in fact, Carnegie is advocating that I be myself. I am genuinely interested in other people. However, this doesn't mean that Carnegie's techniques are always used in humanitarian ways. Many phone solicitors, debt collectors, and salesmen, use these techniques as means of making the sale. This is not how one "makes friends." That is called manipulation. I recall a story of Mother Teresa being granted a large donation of money with instructions on how to spend it. She reportedly returned the donation, saying that the giver should give freely with no attachment to the outcome. I think that that is truly the only way one can be sure that one is coming from a positive place: if you have no investment, no attachment, in the outcome. To that end, I focus more on Carnegie's techniques for getting along with others than on his techniques for trying to get things from people.(...)
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Summary: Fantastic book - get the CD version
Review: Great book.. well read.. makes so much sense.. Will help you as soon as you put the philosophy in place. Has helped me secure many jobs, higher pay, turned defeat into opportunity, landed me a 90% pay rise and a transfer to singapore when the unit I was working for in europe was shut down.. Also was able to improve relations with my girl friend and she has not left me since.. Buy this book today.. don't delay..
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Summary: Timeless People Skills
Review: This book is indeed potentially life changing, as so many of the reviews have stated. It continues to speak volumes into my daily interactions with people even though I listened to it nearly four years ago. I have found that following its advice does not make me phony or narcissistic - rather just the opposite (I suppose you can choose to try to pretend to care about people, but people are wiser than that). The book promotes understanding others' behavior and could have the very positive effect of reducing day-to-day conflict. Your blood pressure could lower and relationships flourish. It certainly has had this effect in my life. And the(at times)dated language? Classic! I recommend it highly!
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Summary: Worth reading, but be your own judge
Review: Anyone who reads this classic self help book will find it beneficial. It wouldn't have lasted as long as it has if it weren't helpful. However, the first time I attempted to systematically put this book into practice, I was working with a domineering, loud, opinionated and outspoken person who subsequently stamped all over me and my "Carnegie" principles. True, many people (maybe a majority) will respond positively when you practice Dale Carnegie's plan, but there is a sizeable minority who will walk all over you regardless. And a person who has self-image problems? I hate to say it, but Dale Carnegie's book can set them up to be mowed over. I have balanced Dale Carnegie with Manuel J. Smith's book WHEN I SAY NO I FEEL GUILTY. I found it more effective when I built a good, healthy respect for myself first. Then guess what! I found myself winning more friends and influencing more people!
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