An Unfinished Marriage

Rating:
Summary: Whining by the Sea
Review: We are supposed to believe that Joan Anderson has created a new and better self in her year of solitude by the sea. Self? Or selfishness? While she pretends to be self-analytical, she proves herself to be self-centered. Where is her affection for her husband? And how does she expect to do her part in creating a marriage if she doesn't have it? I sympathized with Robin and kept wondering why she didn't. She doesn't describe him positively. He is often described by what he can't do. He is *rarely beguiling.* While the reader is expected to listen to and learn from her forays into the past, she sees nothing of value in the moment when Robin pulls things saved in a box, precious since childhood. While she took a year to *find herself,* she has no patience with Robin's own attempts to adjust to their new life together. She doesn't want him to find his own way; she wants it him to do it HER way. She would like the reader to think this book is about how she and her husband create a new phase of their marriage together. But don't let her fool you. This book is all about HER, and everyone else, friends, family, and most especially poor Robin, are merely minor characters. Joan may have learned to love herself in that year by the sea, and good for her, but she is far from being the role model she sets herself up as in this book. She still has much to learn about loving other people.

Rating:
Summary: Yet another layer of bitter onion
Review: You know what? I was reading through the reviews of this and other Joan Anderson books, and I decided to agree (for once) with another reviewer. I don't really like this woman either. And that says a lot because I like everyone. I thought at first I was simply jealous because she took a year away and got in touch with herself, and then I realized (A year by the sea) that I wouldn't even want to do this. And so she did, so I gave the benefit of the doubt to her.. But you know what else? This is a fairy tale book that wouldn't really help very many women at all... How many of us COULD take a year off and how many of us would spend hours writing a book if we were trying to make an "unfinished marriage" work. Maybe I am just bitter because my unfinished marriage didn't even stay intact.. and I believe most husbands might have vanished like a sea vapor while most wives took a year by the sea... geez louise.

I agree that men deserve a woman who will think the best of them, not be whining about what his unemployable status due to health does to HER, and who simply tries harder to live life rather than publishing driveling journals of self absorption. I do not usually get this vitriolic about books or ariticles, and I adore self introspection usually... but his gal's books really have tripped my trigger.

I am sorry amd definitel if this book spoke to anyone and helped them, then more power to it. It just didn't help me and it spoke to me in an evil, red-horned, trident poking kind of way to make me furious..... To me, it seems that the whiny "I can't kill my own snakes" I need a break women always get the man who is steady and understanding... I and the countless others who try to smile, make men feel good about themselves, etc... our men decide to work on lives that are difficult and hard with other women besides us... It makes me cry and here I go with journal type drivel, just as I condemned poor Joan... Enufff, but I don't like her style. Period.