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The authors would have done well to include one of those "The more I learn about men, the more I love my cat" bumper stickers inside the pages of this book. It's full of advice along the lines of the pithy stuff found in last year's The Rules. Its authors, three 30-ish New York natives--a lawyer, a doctor, and an accountant--who refer to themselves as "professionals" over and over again, the better to convince you to cook their dinner--reveal all. Its sex advice reads like How to Make Love to a Man written with the acidity of Dr. Laura Schlessinger. Men like fellatio, stupid. Men like attractive women more than they like smart, successful women, stupid. Men would never get married except marriage means getting laid on a regular basis, you silly goose. Brad, Chris, and Rich spice it all up by including detailed passages from their dating pasts: "They proceeded to Chris's apartment to listen to his extensive music collection. Next thing they knew, they found themselves rolling around on Chris's bed.... He wanted to get to know her before having sex with her, even if she didn't care either way.... Unfortunately, she was bewildered." They also answer ever-mysterious relationship questions. How to tell if your boyfriend is cheating on you? Check to see if the condom supply is dwindling at an unusual rate. Wondering why he doesn't introduce you to his parents? He doesn't want to marry you and thinks that meeting the folks would make wedding bells start ringing in your ears. Does he like it when you two are on a date and you talk about your ex-boyfriend? Nope.
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