Rating: 
Summary: The perfect antidote for stress caused by your "niceness."
Review: "The ways we nice people were taught to earn social acceptance burn us out, bottle us up and build barriers between us and those we care most about. Thus our "niceness" behaviors rob us of joy and a sense of wholeness and render ineffective, even harmful, our well-meaning efforts to be helpful to others. The stress they create is killing us." "This book calls you to stress avoidance. Books on stress usually talk about stress reduction or management. They address stress over which you have no control (loss of a job, death of a loved one, the crash of your hard disk, your car, your stocks). I focus, however, on the stress you can control, stress created by behaviors you learned as a child that now are unthinking habits with damaging, often invisible down sides. I argue that with a little insight and reasonable effort you can change your behavior. Then I show you how to do it." "Niceness damages us. Love, on the other hand, makes life work right, and you know you owe it to yourself to love. But if love is something you do, if love is how you show respect to yourself and those close to you, how do you love those who tick you off, or disappoint you, or expect too much from you, or cling to you like a vine? In this book, I answer this question; I show you how to stop engaging in nine, very common, self-defeating behaviors and begin to love in ways that are liberating, integrating and effective, as well as nice." Commendations From Others "I hope many people will read this book for its honesty, eloquence, and wisdom." Harold S. Kushner, author of When Bad Things Happen to Good People "Practical lessons for daily living from sound psychological principles." Martin V. Covington, Professor of Psychology, University of California, Berkeley "A how-to book that breaks new ground." Robert McAfee Brown, author, professor emeritus Pacific School of Religion. "Just the push many need to begin to set practical limits and to practice healthy self assertiveness." Publishers Weekly "Speaks to the workplace. I wish I had this book earlier in my career." Darrell Floyd, Human Resources Manager, Nissan Motor Corp. USA "An upbeat and honest message. It belongs in all counseling and public libraries." Lisa S.Wise, Library Journal "This book could save (you) 100s of hours in therapy, and it's a lot more fun." Robert Ball, director, California's Self-Esteem Task Force, author, Walking on Water. "Profound, provocative, and very, very practical." Shirley Nice, the Corporate Coach, San Francisco "An unsentimental blueprint for complete living." Leroy Aarons, author, Prayers for Bobby "Easy to read, honest, fun, and worth digesting" Jean Barker, Earthlight Magazine "A superb book! Transforming. It deserves a wide audience" Stanley F. Hogle, executive director, Interface-Samaritan Counseling Centers, Houston "Attention to this very readable book can make a difference in the way we live." Paul Gertmenian, CEO, Henry Gertmenian Company, San Francisco "Provocative, like a time bomb! Stimulating grist for discussion." Benjamin Weir, author of Hostage Bound, Hostage Free ***** A GOOD INTENTIONS "Time Warner AudioBook," which the author narrates, also is available through Amazon.com. A Discussion Guide for Small Groups studying the book has been published by Bridge Resources of the Presbyterian Church U.S.A. The book itself is being published in nine languages.
Rating: 
Summary: Being "nice" isn't always as good as it looks!
Review: Always being "nice" looks so good from the outside, but oh, the pain that is there inside. Duke Robinson's touching book guides you through simple, yet challanging steps to relieve that pain forever. My first intention was to read this book as a self-help guide in learnng how to deal with my mistakes. I found my "niceness" in many chapters and immediately began trying some of the suggested changes. They do work and I feel better! Being a believer that continuing education is a lifelong process, I want to share this book with others. Using the author's study guide, I plan to introduce "Good Intentions" to an adult study group at my church.
Rating:
Summary: Being "nice" isn't always as good as it looks!
Review: Always being "nice" looks so good from the outside, but oh, the pain that is there inside. Duke Robinson's touching book guides you through simple, yet challanging steps to relieve that pain forever. My first intention was to read this book as a self-help guide in learnng how to deal with my mistakes. I found my "niceness" in many chapters and immediately began trying some of the suggested changes. They do work and I feel better! Being a believer that continuing education is a lifelong process, I want to share this book with others. Using the author's study guide, I plan to introduce "Good Intentions" to an adult study group at my church.
Rating:
Summary: Thoughtful and Very Useful
Review: Duke Robinson's celebration of life, and com-passion for others is evident in this book.I thought I knew everything....but found somuch useful to me.His years of experience with people, andsituations often complex, only begin withthis book. I can't wait for the next.
Rating:
Summary: How about a 15 on a 1-10 scale?
Review: I have an admission: I can't process Duke Robinson's book as fast as I would like. That's because it contains vast insight into how we would-be nice folk trip over ourselves. So, I'm reading it slowly and taking time for reflection. But I'm also trying new behaviors that the author suggests. For example, I've started saying "I'll have to get back to you" when my own reactivity kicks in. A simple suggestion, almost common sense. But it helps preserve important relationships and gives me time to come up with a calm, healing response. If you feel a need to be perfect, if you lose yourself into other people's problems, if you sputter in the face of ambush, if you have trouble saying what you want, this book is for you. It offers practical, down-to-earth, doable ideas that work. But be warned: the author will help you envision the climb toward more authentic niceness, and he will provide some handholds. But the work will be up to you. If you're like me, you will find his suggestions difficult to pull off. But the effort will be worthwhile.
Rating:
Summary: Duke has great ideas for all of us!
Review: I write in response to the guy who felt "totally ripped off" by the chapter in this book on dealing with irrational attacks. I can't tell whether he's baiting the author to see if he'll follow his own directions, or if he's simply throwing a childish tantrum that illustrates the excessive and irrational attacks people often have to suffer. Either way, he obviously didn't get it, and although he calls himself a "fairly nice, sensitive, compassionate person," his letter makes that difficult to believe. Perhaps if he had read the whole book and used the practical exercises, he would have seen how helpful this book could be. This book opened my eyes to a lot of important insights into how my "niceness" has undercut my integrity and effectiveness as a person. I'm impressed with the substance and clarity with which it's written, and especially the fact that I couldn't find any "psychobabble." I'm also impressed with the balance of theorhetical understanding and practical information. It's been of tremendous help to me. I cannot recommend it too highly. I was recently interviewing for a job and was called in for EIGHT interviews. The stress was on! Duke helped me to see the big picture, to focus on what I wanted and needed, and not be bogged down with needless baggage that some of us "nice" people carry with us. This book has helped me with personal relationships at home and with friends, has refocused my attention to my communication methods so that I use clear and succinct wording, and it has helped me see that nice guys can finish first. Thanks, Duke. The book is great
Rating:
Summary: Duke has great ideas for all of us!
Review: I write in response to the guy who felt "totally ripped off" by the chapter in this book on dealing with irrational attacks.
I can't tell whether he's baiting the author to see if he'll follow his own directions, or if he's simply throwing a childish tantrum that illustrates the excessive and irrational attacks people often have to suffer. Either way, he obviously didn't get it, and although he calls himself a "fairly nice, sensitive, compassionate person," his letter makes that difficult to believe. Perhaps if he had read the whole book and used the practical exercises, he would have seen how helpful this book could be.
This book opened my eyes to a lot of important insights into how my "niceness" has undercut my integrity and effectiveness as a person. I'm impressed with the substance and clarity with which it's written, and especially the fact that I couldn't find any "psychobabble." I'm also impressed with the balance of theorhetical understanding and practical information. It's been of tremendous help to me. I cannot recommend it too highly.
I was recently interviewing for a job and was called in for EIGHT interviews. The stress was on! Duke helped me to see the big picture, to focus on what I wanted and needed, and not be bogged down with needless baggage that some of us "nice" people carry with us.
This book has helped me with personal relationships at home and with friends, has refocused my attention to my communication methods so that I use clear and succinct wording, and it has helped me see that nice guys can finish first.
Thanks, Duke. The book is great
Rating: 
Summary: Disappointing
Review: I'm basically a fairly nice, sensitive, compassionate person. But I was flabbergasted by the advice for Mistake #5 (Reasoning with Irrationality). This chapter suggests using empathy, compassion, and an incredibly huge amount of patience to deal with an irrational attack. This approach is totally unrealistic. Only a very small percentage of human beings are capable of this much empathy, compassion, and patience. I really wanted some help with this problem and now I feel totally ripped off
Rating:
Summary: Inclusive in its appeal
Review: In "Good Intentions" Duke Robinson offers the distilled essence of his faith journey. In language that cuts across the exclusiveness of cultic talk he speaks in an inclusive way about life and the role grace and truth can play in its living. In our family there is a wide spectrum of religious orientations and of no orientation at all. We have given copies of "Good Intentions" to each one confident that it will meet them where they are and add a dimension of richness to their lives.
Rating:
Summary: Take your time, but READ THIS BOOK!
Review: In Chapter 6 of his book "Good Intentions," author Duke Robinson explains why 'telling little lit' is one of "The Nine Unconscious Mistakes of Nice People," even though we all know that it is often much more difficult to tell the truth. With this in mind, I cannot describe my experiences of reading it three times and listening to the tape twice as 'enjoyable.' Reading this book and absorbing its wisdom is hard work. It should not be read from cover to cover in one sitting. It is much better to read it one chapter at ta time, with a few days - or a week - in between to mull over, discuss, and argue with its startling assertions long enough to understand how true they are and wonder: "Why didn't I think of that long ago?"Like much hard work, however, there is a rich payoff, as we begin to understand ourselves and our relationships to our fellows more clearly. Duke Robinson has made a remarkable contribution to human relations.I urge you to read it. Slowly.Recently Liberal Arts Graduate.(After 55 years at Penn State)
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