The Orchid Thief

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Summary: no story, no plot, no drama...just long-winded verbiage
Review: i read this book expecting some kind of genuine narrative or story -- but instead i kept confronting long passages of exposition that seemed designed to draw attention only to the writer and her stylish prose. this read like an overblown magazine piece.

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Summary: Brilliant, funny, sad, and wondrous.
Review: A brilliant and funny excursion through a wondrous jumble of oddballs and seekers. Breathtaking writing about Florida's landscape, especially the dank, fetid Fakahatchee swamp. Like Joseph Mitchell and McPhee, Orlean's writing about lives built around obsessions is often funny, though never cruel or demeaning, and always deepened with the mournful recognition of human frailty.

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Summary: up-side down photograph
Review: I have been growing orchids for many years, and it bothers me that the photograph on the cover of a phalenopsis flower is up-side down. Was this done on purpose or is it an error? I have a feeling it is an error which is unfortunate because it spoils the cover.

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Summary: THE ORCHID THIEF is an adventure worth taking.
Review: THE ORCHID THIEF is a venture into the murky terrain and temperament of those obsessed with orchids. This descriptive account treks into the habitat of these botanical beauties. Where the humidity is beyond hot and sticky. It is "hot and gummy". Where the vegetation is "dense as steel wool". Where all your senses feel like they are "plugged into a light socket". Not since, Bogart and Hepburn trudged through the muck dragging The African Queen has suspense slithered and oozed with each cautious footstep. With clarity THE ORCHID THIEF's author illuminates the shady deals and exposes the ethics and values which accompany an obsession. The African Queen may have had Bogart and Hepburn, but THE ORCHID THIEF has Orlean and Laroche.

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Summary: My adventures in Orchid-land
Review: Four years ago, I heard about a case in Florida of an eccentric nursery owner who had been arrested, along with three Seminole assistants, with four bags of endangered plants they had removed from a swamp near Naples.I couldn't imagine why anyone would poach orchids, and I couldn't imagine how this peculiar guy had hooked up with the Seminole tribe, and once I heard about his plan -- to clone the orchids and flood the world market with them -- I knew I had to find out more.I wrote a piece about the trial for The New Yorker, but once I finished I knew that I wanted to go back to Florida and keep penetrating the story.I'm not an orchid lover; I came to the story with no vested interest; I just found the people, the setting, the history, and especially the emotions behind it irresistible.Certainly this is a singular tale, but the momentum was all very familiar -- the desire to believe in something, to make your life exceptional in some way, the yearning for a way to make your existence make sense, and of course the incredible seduction of beauty. I hope orchid lovers read the book, but I really wrote it for all readers, plant lovers or not, who like to examine American culture in unexpected ways. Jonathan Demme, the director of Silence of the Lambs and Beloved, has optioned the book and has a screenwriter working on an adaptation right now; I'm curious to see who will portray my protagonist, the passionate and obsessive and shrewd and peculiar John Laroche.

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Summary: A perfect little book
Review: This book is fascinating; I stayed up all night to read it because I couldn't put it down. The fact is, people go nuts for orchids, and they say and do hilarious things in the pursuit of them. And they *will* pursue them, by whatever means necessary, and yet they will never have enough of them. Sort of like ... the human condition. I can't say enough about this book. I loved it.

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Summary: brilliant, funny, original non-fiction
Review: i've never read a book quite like this: at the center is a very specific event (an orchid poaching) but then the book radiates outward, looking at the people, the place, and the history that the orchid poaching touches. i have no affection for orchids, but this book was so much more than that. it's a kind of american epic, and a great read at the same time.

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Summary: flowery language isn't enough to keep this from wilting
Review: i found this book to be dull and pointless. orlean's writing style isn't enough to save this book from its essentially superficial quality.

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Summary: where passion meets beauty
Review: I approached this book thinking, "orchids....what could I possibly care about orchids?" But, was I ever in for a surprise, because Orlean had me hooked on her subject and her characters by page 2. This book does what all great books do: it lures you into its world, holds you there and doesn't let you go until long after you've read the final page. This is a stunningly original work by a writer of extraordinary talent and enthusiasm for her subject. Like the flowers she writes about, "The Orchid Thief" is a rare and brilliantly exotic thing that will be loved and admired by all who encounter it.

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Summary: excuse me?
Review: In this book is revealed John Laroche's guide to "mutating" plants, and his general theory of mutation. Laroche says that mutation is responsible for some people being real smart. Like him, for example. He tells Orlean that what must've happened is that he was exposed to some kind of toxic stuff when he was young and was then mutated into the brilliant person he is today. I am not joking. This is in the book. Apparently either Orlean is making the whole thing up (quite possible) or John Laroche actually believes in a comic book account of genetic mutation. I guess this is where his lack of formal education really starts to show.
As any schoolboy who has not gone to school and instead has learned about life from reading comic books knows, people are mutated by being pivotally exposed to some radioactive or otherwise toxic agent. This is how they derive their superpowers. In the case of John Laroche, the superpower is extreme intelligence. Laroche then goes on to state that he has "mutated" lots of plants by putting germinating seeds in the microwave. Now, again, there is a popular misconception, propagated by the media, that microwaves are in some way "radioactive" This is not so. Microwave ovens do nothing but excite water molecules with non-visible light, making the water heat up. Laroche would have achieved the same result by putting the plant seeds under a heat lamp. The result would be that the germinating seeds would wither and cook and die. The result would NOT be that they would "mutate." So this is all nonsense. The only thing difficult to determine is whether Laroche actually believes any of this. I'm guessing he just made it up as he went along while talking to a captive audience in the form of Susan Orlean.