Rating: 
Summary: Its worth the hype
Review: At first I was reluctant to buy this book because it seemed too much like pop psychology trying to make millions. I read another book on differences between men and women called "You just don't understand" and I liked that one alot so I thought I'd give this one a chance too. Whereas "You just don't understand" focuses more on communication in general, this one focuses more on intimate relationships. Overall the book is quite entertaining and insightful. Once I got started, I ended up reading the entire thing in one long sitting. To some, John Gray's ideas might sound rather sexist and anti-feminist, but they aren't meant to be that way at all. When men do things such as open doors for women or pay for a date, they are not thinking about how helpless the women is, they do it because they think it will please a woman and they feel good when they can provide for her. In the year 2000, many women now take the initiative and ask the guy out first but John Gray gives convincing reasons why this might not always work. John Gray says that a woman's primary source of self esteem in a relationship is to feel loved and get her needs met, and this is harder to do when she is taking the initiative and trying too hard to please him. Although John Gray has put together a lot of good ideas that I can't wait to try out when I date the next guy, I see two major problems with the book which is why I give it 3.5 stars and not five. First, the book is rather long because it is redundant in several spots. The book is close to 400 pages but could easily be 150 pages without omitting any key ideas. Every few pages or so he mentions once again that men feel good when they please a women because it makes him happy too and that women should focus more on responding positively to his advances rather than trying to hard to give him something in return. Second, it doesn't say where John Gray gets his ideas about men and women in relationships. Is this just his own speculation? Is it based on his personal experiences with women? His friends' experiences? Is this based on some psychological research that he was too lazy to cite references for? This is one reason why I prefer "You Just Don't Understand". Deborah Tannen's information came from mainly psychological research.
Rating: 
Summary: FANTASTIC AUTHOR...FANTASTIC BOOK!
Review: First of all, to answer another reviewer's concern about how the author gained his knowledge, John Gray holds a Ph.D. and is extremely well respected around the world in his area of expertise - the psychology of human realtionships. His qualified opinions are not based simply on personal experience or opinion, but on proven, scientific fact and theory. His acclaimed books have been published and sold by the millions, world-wide, in forty languages. Like his renowned book, "Men are from Mars, Woman are from Venus" this book is an insightful look into the psychology of the male-female relationship. This one, however, draws on the behaviours before marriage or a commitment has been made. As Grey points out, normally there is a five step sequence of events that takes place when dating: attraction, uncertainty, exclusivity, intimacey and engagement. As a counsellor who has studied psychology and human behaviour, this is one book I have recommended to many couples and received nothing but positive feedback, not once have I heard a negative comment. This author deserves abundant praises for his research, expertise and writing ability. His books are an opportunity for both male and female readers to learn and understand more about themselves and their personal relationships. He adds a slight touch of humour to his unique writing style, and from the very first page, the reader cannot help but feel, "this is a person I can trust." Based on the world-wide success of books, obviously a multitude of other readers around the globe agree. His books are not "sexist" as some believe; they are an actual account based on fact from a psychological perspective. For anyone who complains about the length of the book, a shorter version would not do the book justice. Each page is a key component to the overall picture, and if you fail to see it's purpose, you are missing out on a valuable part of the overall analyis. I highly recommend "Mars and Venus on a Date" to anyone who is dating, regardless of age. Gray has a terrific presentation style and the principles of the book are not limited to any particular age group. Even if you are not currently dating, read the book anyway; it contains some insightful and priceless observations.
Rating:
Summary: SUCCESS FOR FINDING YOUR SOULMATE..THIS BOOK IS THE TRUTH
Review: A year ago,I didn't want to believe this book was the truth.I wanted to believe I could be the agressor in dating and relationships.Newflash ladies being the agressor never works.The one who invest the most is the one who leads and wears the pants.Do you want a puppie for a man???This book is healthy for women and men.One thing will never change and that's the sex of the female and male.Some rules remain..one of them are masculine and feminine energy.IF YOUR HAVING TROUBLE HAVING SUCCESS IN RELATIONSHIPS..DO YOURSELF A FAVOR AND READ THIS BOOK AND EXAMINE THE TIMES YOU HAD SUCCESS AND FAILURE IN DATING.AFTER READING AND APPLYING THE ADVICE IN THIS BOOK..I JUST WANT TO WISH YOU A BEAUTIFUL LIFE LONG MARRIAGE...HAPPINESS AND BLESSINGS TO ALL!!!!!!!!
Rating:
Summary: Dating advice for traditional men and women
Review: I borrowed this book from my brother about four years ago. Four years later I have been married for three years and decided to finally read the book. Summary:
The basic idea of the book is that there are five stages to the dating process:
1. Attraction
2. Uncertainty
3. Exclusivity
4. Intimacy
5. Engagement The rest of the book is a collection of insights on how to make relationships successful or how to recognize when it is time to end a relationship. My Comments:
First, I must admit that being involved in a traditional relationship (I am a married heterosexual) the insights in the book seemed fairly relevant and well designed. But, this is also one of the problems I see with the book. The book is designed exclusively for traditional, heterosexual relationships. If you are not a man or a woman looking for someone of the opposite sex to marry, then this isn't the book for you. The ultimate goal, as defined in the book, is marriage. If you are not looking to get married, then this isn't the book for you. The book is written from a very traditional perspective. With the increase in non-traditional relationships (homosexuality, bisexuality, cohabitation, etc.) this book could alienate a lot of people. Also, there are continual references to God throughout the book. These references often coincide with a concept the author calls 'soul mates'. There is a trend in American society away from the traditional view of God, specifically seeing God as an active force in people's lives. As a result, this book could also alienate those people that don't believe in God or don't feel that God is active in their lives. And the idea of soul mates (as Dr. Gray outlines it in the book it is the idea that there is one special person for you out there) is, in my humble opinion, very outdated. Perhaps Dr. Gray isn't arguing that there is only ONE person that you could marry, but he seems to think that there aren't very many - if there is more than one - and that they are hard to find. Another major problem with this approach to relationships is that Dr. Gray presents relationships in a very functional sense. Let me explain... Instead of saying that perhaps the way people approached romantic relationships in the past (pre 1990) may not have been the best way to do it (men calling women, being responsible for everything that takes place, women being receptive rather than aggressive, etc.), Dr. Gray incorporates all of these things into his theory about how relationships and dating are supposed to work. He seems to argue that because these behaviors exist they must be necessary. This is a circular argument from which one cannot escape. They are necessary so they must exist. They exist because they are necessary. I would argue that the traditional dating patterns of bygone ages are outdated and anti-modal. Sure, he offers ideas and thoughts where men and women can change, but he also seems to be arguing that a lot of things should just plain stay the same. I disagree out right with this idea. We live in a different time. I should also mention that the version I read is 370 pages long. It could have been condensed to about 150 pages and still covered everything he wanted to say adequately. On the positive side, because I am in a heterosexual relationship, I did find some of Dr. Gray's insights helpful. However, the one's that I found applicable to my relationship I found by sifting through the broad, sweeping claims he makes about genders and in between comments about how God will help us find our partner and how we can find a soul mate; all of which I thought was worthless trash. Overall, this book would be useful to someone that firmly believes in God, wants a traditional relationship with a woman, and believes that the old way of dating/courting is still the right way. If this describes you (it probably describes over 60% of the U.S. population, meaning Dr. Gray understands there is a market for this type of stuff) then this would be a good book. If you don't meet this criteria, look elsewhere.
Rating:
Summary: A Must Read, One of the Best on the Market
Review: When I've read the famous/infamous 'The rules' I was in doubt; but when I've read 'Mars and Venus on a Date' I was convinced... The controversial 'The rules' uses time old and wise observations (even though they are oversimplified and sound manipulative), but this book takes those 'truths' and explains them from the point of view of human psychology. I understand why feminists might hate this book and why they might think it takes us (females) back a hundred years -- (if you happen to be one - the book might be that proverbial red cloth for a bull). The bottom line is -- we (as in males, females, species etc.) are created particular way... information written in our genes, many hundreds of thousands years ago, necessary for the survival of the species, regardless whether we are nice guys/girls or jerks and 'game players'. Men and women act and feel and are motivated by certain things, and not because we are mean or manipulative. I've scanned quite a few books on the subject of dating and interpersonal psychology and this book is an eye opener for those of us who can't figure out whether we should be our authentic selves in every situations or whether there is a necessity to follow some sort of rules or guidelines for successful dating. (I compare it to polite and acceptable rules of, say, behaving at a dinner table). Buy it and read it!! (it's about a buck on half.com) and even if you disagree, you will benefit from this alternative and precious knowledge!!
Rating:
Summary: Solid, but a minor warning to shy readers
Review: John Gray's "Mars and Venus On a Date" is a solid piece of work, with well-reasoned insights into the dynamics of male-female romantic relationships. One note, though, to men who are shy, and might see the book as a guide to learning how to get dates more easily. Shyness is not really addressed here. This is by no means meant as a criticism, but given the notoriety of the "Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus" books, many men may wonder if this kind of help is being offered here. The closest Gray comes to touching on shyness is when he says that many men get tongue-tied when approaching women they're attracted to, and that usually the best advice is to say the most simple thing ("Hi, I'm John," etc.). He also briefly touches on the various ways women might flirt, and the ways to tastefully send out non-verbal cues that you're interested. This territory is covered in a total of maybe three paragraphs, at different points in the book. One of the last sections touches on dozens of places to meet your soulmate. The book is great for people who don't have any trouble in the initial, attraction phase. But for those who can't get to that first approach, this may not be the best place to start.
Rating: 
Summary: A good read, but form your own opinions...
Review: This book has some good points and bad points. Like most relationship guides (i.e. The Rules), if you agree with what the author is saying, it's a good book. If you don't agree with them, it's a bad book. I think the point to take away with this book is that John Gray has talked to a LOT of people about relationships and the suggestions and information in this book is based on what he learned from talking to real people. For example, he talks about why men don't call after a date. I had no idea that if a man didn't call you, it doesn't necessarily mean he doesn't like you. It's good to know the other reasons why he's not calling, and that not only is it okay for you to call him, but you SHOULD call him because it'll let him know that you're not mad at him for not calling! He does have some very old fashioned views, such as, the man should always pay for the dates. Nevermind if the man makes $25K a year and the woman makes $70K... now-a-days that kind of thinking is just not practical. He also says some strange things like, if a man opens a car door for you, you should not reach over and unlock his door because that will take away all the pleasure that he got from opening the car door for you. All in all, it's a good read, has some good information about the five stages of dating, why men and women act the way they do, how to talk to each other, and how to act. Take what you agree with and use it, but form your own opinions. Don't follow it like it's a bible.
Rating: 
Summary: OK at first, then offensive
Review: The first 2/3 of the book was OK, with balanced "points of view" and "how-to's" for both men and women. Some of the information was interesting, explanatory, and useful; some was not. But then the author began giving unbalanced treatment, primarily telling women how they ought to behave and what they ought to say. The message was that a man has a large and fragile ego, and that a woman should support his ego. She should never disagree with him, except "playfully". In public, she should paint him as a white knight, regardless of what really happened. Perhaps it was just the author's writing style, but most of his examples, supposedly of real couples he'd observed or counseled, seemed made-up. Finally, at the end of the book, the author insults the reader's intelligence with an idiotic, redundant, and unnecessary list of 101 places to look for a mate. Very patronizing.
Rating:
Summary: Solid, but a minor warning to shy readers
Review: John Gray's "Mars and Venus On a Date" is a solid piece of work, with well-reasoned insights into the dynamics of male-female romantic relationships. One note, though, to men who are shy, and might see the book as a guide to learning how to get dates more easily. Shyness is not really addressed here. This is by no means meant as a criticism, but given the notoriety of the "Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus" books, many men may wonder if this kind of help is being offered here. The closest Gray comes to touching on shyness is when he says that many men get tongue-tied when approaching women they're attracted to, and that usually the best advice is to say the most simple thing ("Hi, I'm John," etc.). He also briefly touches on the various ways women might flirt, and the ways to tastefully send out non-verbal cues that you're interested. This territory is covered in a total of maybe three paragraphs, at different points in the book. One of the last sections touches on dozens of places to meet your soulmate. The book is great for people who don't have any trouble in the initial, attraction phase. But for those who can't get to that first approach, this may not be the best place to start.
Rating:
Summary: Great Book, Good Points
Review: I heard about this book and decided to check it out at the library. I really enjoyed it. This book is easy to read, insightful and funny. There are good tips, mostly common sense stuff, that are organized in a manner that will help everyone understand the opposite sex a little better. For the most part, though, the books is motvational and interesting. I bought my own copy and refer to it often. Well worth the read.
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