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Summary: A book with a lot of different things.
Review: I have read a lot of relationships books. This one, by far, is the best for me. Was almost like a total revelation, I am giving it as a gift for special ocassions and recomending it to everyone I know.
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Summary: This book should be required reading for engaged couples!!!
Review: This book is simple, yet powerful. Gary Chapman provides a realistic assessment of marriage and common marriage complaints/problems. His suggested solutions are practical and easily adaptable. I highly recommend this book to people who are contemplating marriage, people who are happily married, and those who are not.
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Summary: The Five Love Languages: truly an "a-ha" experience!
Review: Chapman takes a fresh and innovative approach to relationship.
Using the concept that we all have a specific "language" we speak when we care deeply about someone, Chapman helps us to become aware of our own love language(s) as well as teaches us to "speak fluently" in the love language of our significant other.
A "must read" for everyone who finds themselves in relationship!
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Summary: The Best
Review: Although I am not married I feel that this book can enhance anyone's life. It was a real eye-opener for me and helped me to properly relate to those I love. I learned that I am not the weird one neither are they, we are all different. God made us different for a reason. What would this world be if we all related to life, love, and other mysteries in the same way? I recommend this book to anyone who is searching for ways to improve their communication with those they love. I have shared this book with many people and I hope to some day be able to share with my children
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Summary: Great for Everyone who is involved in Relationships
Review: If you are not a recluse, you need to read this book. This book has enhanced (if not saved) my sister's marriage. I recommend it to every couple that I come in contact with. As a reader you will gain so much insight into your relationships with your friends, neighbors, spouses, children, co-workers --- EVERYONE.
If you 'lend' this book to others, be prepared to buy another, because once they read it they will want to 'lend' it to their friends and so on....
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Summary: All the lights came on!
Review: I have been married for four years--just long enough to get over the honeymoon. My husband and I have even recently tried some marriage counseling. I have been searching for solutions to my disallusionment of marriage. This book has changed my life! I now understand my husband's true needs and he finally understands mine. While reading "The Five Love Languages", I thought of five couples that could benefit from this knowledge, and several marriages that might have been saved. Though the author points out that, ultimately, the key to a successful relationship is choosing to love, this book puts it within anyone's power. I would recommend it to everyone--especially those who are engaged to be married. Had I known these principles earlier, I could have saved myself and my spouse a lot of heartache. I feel hopeful about the future and look forward to the rest of my life with my husband
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Summary: I liked the book, so I guess I'm not your average guy...
Review: SEX!
Now that I've got the attention of all the other men out there, let me continue my review...
This book is a definate 10 in my opinion. I learned a LOT about myself I didn't realize. The relationship with my girlfriend grew a lot faster than before I read this book.
I chalk it up to knowing how to "speak" her "love languages", and how to interpret hers.
Every guy out there should read this book, even if they're not in a relationship or married. Yes, for the average guy that loves hockey, fixing cars and watching action movies, the book may seem like a waste of time. But give up a hockey game some night to read this book.
I can't guarantee results, but boy, you'll sure learn a lot about why she acts the way she acts, and how you can rekindle the spark in your relationships.
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Summary: Good Book
Review: This book REALLY gives you the steps to improving your relationship. My husband and I have a great relationship already and there still was much food for thought in there. I also liked it because it have a Christian base to it- and to me, that is important.
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Summary: A must read for anyone in a relation (that means everyone)
Review: I consider this book one of the must read books for anyone in a relation (that means everyone). I rank this book up with John Gray's Mars & Venus book. The concept is simple: People express their love differently. If you're not expressing your love for your spouse in the way they like, your efforts will not be as effective as they could be. For example, if I buy my wife gifts all the time but to her love is expressed by spending lots of quality time together, then my gifts aren't going to make her happy. By focussing my efforts on what makes her happy (quality time in my example), my effort will be much more effective. Dr. Chapman states that people usually show love in the way they like to receive it. While that's not necessarily the way your spouse likes to receive it. Kind of like when we buy someone a gift we often buy something we like instead of what they like. It's a very simple concept but learning it completely can lead to very powerful results. I especially like how Dr. Chapman gives specific examples from his counseling experiences. To me, specific examples are what really drives a point home. Dr. Chapman does mention principles and teachings from the bible several times, but honestly I don't think that would turn anyone off if they're not a Christian. Finally as someone else pointed out, it is funny how he mentions his own name every change he gets. Funny yes. Annoying just a little. Effect, definitely. You won't forget his name after reading this book! Overall I highly recommend it, especially if both couples in a relationship can read it together.
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Summary: The Love in Your Marriage Can Be a Choice
Review: The author says love is a choice. He says that the infatuation that people experience in the beginning of the relationship is not real love. It is something else. Real love takes work while the infatuation period is instinctual and effortless. But isn't it the stuff we dream of and wish would last forever? Can we really accept that we will only get that chance at the beginning of the relationship and that thereafter, in order to remain monogamous, we must accept that it is not for us to feel ever again? It explains a lot. But I accept his theory with the angst of a romantic.
Yet anyone who is married and holds married life as a value that must be maintained must at some point consider the notion that making the marriage work after the honeymoon can be a matter of personal choice. And in so choosing, there are actions that communicate that willingness to different people psychologically. These are the five love languages that the author discusses: Words of Affirmation, Quality Time, Giving Gifts, Acts of Service, Physical Touch. I will not go into any details of what is meant by each of these here. The titles are somewhat self-explanatory, with the exception of the last one, which does not necessarily refer to sex. The author explains each love language along with the concept that most people are chiefly responsive to just one. He also discusses how to determine your own as well as your spouse's, and even provides some optimistic advice on how to practice the love languages with an unreciprocating partner. Despite the author's Christian underpinnings, as a non-Christian, to me this did not detract from the relevance of the author's ideas.
In fact, these "love languages" are not confined only to the marriage relationship, but may also serve to strengthen bonds with children - or perhaps any other person you need to communicate your love and support for. I especially found the chapter on children the most valuable because it not only expands the concept beyond the marriage relationship, but also drives home the point. We might have a choice as to whether we wish to stay married or not - but our children are ours forever.
And this brings me back to the point about marriage. Far from being ready to claim mastery of the ultimate male-female partnership, I have reflected upon it a great deal. In an age where the divorce rate challenges the age-old institution upon which the family is built, one must ask how marriages were ever successful in the past. Some may point out that they really weren't, but that society simply forced two people to be miserable by making it taboo to separate. And this then begs the question, why would the world's varied cultures and divinely inspired religions condone this relationship again and again? In fact, I would venture to point out that for the vast measure of our recorded history marriage has not only been a standard, but has also been traditionally arranged! What ancient wisdom allowed such "life-sentences" to form such a firm foundation for the basic building block of society?
I suspect the answer lies right here in this book. As hard as it may be to admit, the commonplace yearning for finding a new and exciting fling is quite likely an unfortunate addiction to a desire that in its very nature is meant to be only a temporary rush that pulls two people inexplicably together at the heart during their initial engagement. It is later, through maturity and insight into what makes the other person tick that we can choose to make each other perpetually happy and foster the bonds of enduring love. This book provides some valid insight into this process. It is light and easy reading that I think every couple should invest some time into, again and again.
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