Rating: Summary: This movie was so INCREDIBLY¿ senseless! Review: This movie is neither creative nor thought-provoking, all because it's not an original idea. It's just this big copy of different fictional masterpieces that have come together to create a catastrophe! They just mixed TV shows in together namely Crystal maze and Xena Warrior Princess. They really tried to copy Tomb Raider's (the game) levels only insulting the artists that created the game with their pathetic attempt to make a great fantasy flick! They tried to make such a great Star Wars kind-of-movie only to make a disaster of the cinema industry. They had would-be light saber fights and even this weird podrace. The costumes and the sets make this statement even more obvious! The make-up was horrible. The lighting was terrible and it ruined one of the only good things about this feature-the cinematography! And what's with the colours? Most of the film was dull green, red, and orange in color (sets, costumes)! The costumes were another thing that needed professional help. What happens when the costumes from "Star Wars Episode I" meet "The Lost World"? A nuclear meltdown- a fiasco, also known as "Dungeons and Dragons"! They could have made such a good movie because the title is pretty good. It sounds like something you'd want to see but you realize that it's really not something you'd want to see, 4 minutes into the movie. Worst scenes were the ones with the main characters. In the DVD special feature option, the alternate ending the director decided not to use was a whole lot better and more realistic than the surreal so-called surprising ending he decided to use! The deleted scenes in the DVD were the best scenes in the movie- some of them were actually okay (but not amusing enough to make me laugh). I would call this a kiddy movie but I would just be insulting and embarrassing the kids around the world! I shouldn't forget the sound. The sound-editing was hopeless, i.e. it can't be fixed (it was that bad). As for the score, the crew don't know what musical sequence they are supposed to use. When someone dies this cheerful score starts in the background with fanfares and chimes! If you really want to know, the plot revolves around this empress that needs to use these scrolls so she can find this thing to control these fake red dragons but the bad guy also wants it. So her mentor's librarian and two commoners help her find it in one of cinematic history's most disappointing adventures! Some war! My sister's fights with me last longer than that! One of the best things about this movie was that it ended so quickly! Who wrote this? The script-every line in the script was messed up. Either they computer didn't print the script out properly or the writers are just plain bad! They're untalented and can't distinguish between good and bad. But there was one thing I really liked and appreciated! The font they used for the ending credits was fascinating! Now let's look at the cast! Jeremy Irons (Propion)-word of advice, stick to doing voices like Scar's in "The Lion King" because this may be news to you but you can't act! Thora Birch (The Empress), I can barely hear your soft whispery voice but it really doesn't matter because you really don't have anything important to say. You try to dress like Queen Amidala but you will forever offend her. Your speeches are uninspiring, tedious, simple, and completely pointless! You tried so hard to become the next Queen Amidala and I pity you, I really do. You acted so badly that I couldn't even laugh at you! Your speeches are so memorable- I'll never forget how stupid and uncalled for they all were! They were the exact opposite of Al Pacino's speech at the end of "Scent Of A Woman". As for you Zoe McLellan (Marina), you need acting lessons like the rest of the cast. I have yet to spot a scene where you don't have this traumatized and puzzled expression on your face! But Kristin Wilson (Norda) is one person I feel really bad for. She was the only person that gave a reasonably good acting performance. Unfortunately for Wilson, the whole movie was stupid. As for the movie's main character, Justin Whalin- you should really stick to TV shows because you don't know how to act and your performance was laughable. At least Scary Movie's Shorty (Marlon Wayans) did what he does best. Acts mad! As for Bruce Payne (Damodar), you're a payne in the ***! First question: "What is with you and that blue fluorescent lipstick?" Question #2: "Are you really this lifeless in real life?" You sound like you have a thousand frogs stuck in his throat! The movie was a mixture of dim-witted characters that were just wannabes of other famous characters. The characters tried to imitate Xena, Queen Amidala, Darth Vader, Lara Croft, Hercules, The Amazons, and Indiana Jones among others, only to fail miserably! The cast can't even cry. The tears were so phony, it would have been more realistic if they drained an ocean and splashed their faces with water to form tears. Even the laughs are fake, they sounded like the ones Dr. Evil's crew do in Austin Powers (and they have an excuse because they're supposed to sound fake). In short, this is the worst cast ensemble in the history of motion pictures! Everyone's (except Kristin Wilson) acting was so awful that it was upsetting. Did the casting people actually hold auditions for this movie or did they just pull people off the streets? This movie is so unbelievably surprising (not in a good way) that it would be the Oscars' worst nightmare but the Raspberries' dream come true! The D&D crew did a good job of making sure they do the worst of everything the Oscars look at before nominating a film. Just for the record, I didn't feel like finishing this movie and I only did for the sake of this review to warn all those who dare to rent such a pathetic piece of work! Ahmed Mashhood
Rating: Summary: Not sure if it will burn Review: Thank god I never purchased this wretched movie. I turned it off after 15-20 minutes. My friend warned me but I insisted on wasting 20 minutes of my time the other night giving this movie a chance. Well my friend said I could keep it and use it for "kindling" in my new fireplace. He said he would have thrown it out but didnt think the movie was worth the effort in disposing of it in the trash... the movie would have been responsible in wasting yet another 15-20 seconds of his time. I want to make sure this piece of %@&* is destroyed so I do not curse anyone else from stumbling across it. Hopefully it will not smoke too much as it burns. I would have been FURIOUS if I had paid $8.50 to see this at the movies. As a fan of the D&D franchise... I just have to reflect... what the *&%$ were the people at TSR/Wizards thinking? The one thing that BAFFLES me even more is that there are rumours of a sequel ?!? I'm not sure if it's possible to make a movie worse than this one but give this director his honest chance in further destroying and ridiculing the D&D franchise.
Rating: Summary: The worst piece of crap I have ever seen Review: I'm a long time D&D gamer... love the genre and am thankful the Lord of the Rings movies did it right. As for the Dungeons and Dragons movie... well, I think a brain dead monkey could write something better. I heard it was bad... I fully expected awful... but no, oh no... I was still not prepared for the load of crap this movie dished out. Special effects? Whatever. The effects were cheesy and you can tell all the money was poured into the final scene with the dragons circling the city. There's one random character that keeps flicking his tongue out - I imagine a computer generated serpentine tongue was supposed to be added, but the movie makers left it untouched, and now you have some goofy looking guy sticking out his tongue now and then. I'm laughing just thinking of how stupid it was. Anyway, don't expect plot, acting or continuity. Where did the Dwarf come from? I don't think it was even explained... and he surely has no reason to join our band of idiot adventurers. What's the point of having a spell caster who never casts spells? And why is a thief becoming a swashbuckling, sword-swinging fighter? So awful. People who call D&D gamers dorks will have a lot of ammunition if they see this lousy piece of pig vomit.
Rating: Summary: Why oh Why!!?!!??! Review: As a child i was a huge fan of the D&D cartoon series it simply rocked! It was different and had enough fantasy creatures to make your head spin so when i heard they were making a movie i couldnt wait! I went to the cinema and my hopes were simply shattered this is a awful awful and one more time for the hard core fans AWFUL movie! What were they thinking they must have payed a small fortune to use the logo and name of such a populaur name as D&D and then they kill it! Seriously unless for humour dont waste your time on this flick it was beyond dissapointing and shows how fantasy can go horribly wrong if it's well thought out!
Rating: Summary: Something's missing in this movie Review: The title of this review should actually have read "Something in addition to good acting, a plot and some less-annoying special effects is missing in this movie", but that would have been too long. What's really missing in this party of retards, which brings shame to the entire D&D franchise, is a high-level cleric that could have ended this unbelievably bad "work of art" with a "Slay living" spell 5 minutes into the movie. $$ 35 million for this piece of crap? What a waste. If it's true that sequels are planned, I hope the producers take a look at the reviews on this page and don't go [throwing] away more "hard-earned" money. But you guys in the US were lucky: The german-dubbed version was even more pathetic.
Rating: Summary: Giving this movie one star is a disgrace to stars. Review: Wow, was this movie bad or what? This had to easily have been one of the worst movies ever made. It is so bad that words really cannot describe it. From the miscasted actors, in which they all were, to the ridiculous costumes, which looked like they were thrown together in 5 seconds, this movie just makes you cringe from scene to scene. This movie should officially be made the new lump of 'coal' that you get if youre naughty for Christmas.
Rating: Summary: Why oh Why!!?!!??! Review: As a child i was a huge fan of the D&D cartoon series it simply rocked! It was different and had enough fantasy creatures to make your head spin so when i heard they were making a movie i couldnt wait! I went to the cinema and my hopes were simply shattered this is a awful awful and one more time for the hard core fans AWFUL movie! What were they thinking they must have payed a small fortune to use the logo and name of such a populaur name as D&D and then they kill it! Seriously unless for humour dont waste your time on this flick it was beyond dissapointing and shows how fantasy can go horribly wrong if it's well thought out!
Rating: Summary: Something's missing in this movie Review: The title of this review should actually have read "Something in addition to good acting, a plot and some less-annoying special effects is missing in this movie", but that would have been too long. What's really missing in this party of retards, which brings shame to the entire D&D franchise, is a high-level cleric that could have ended this unbelievably bad "work of art" with a "Slay living" spell 5 minutes into the movie. $$ 35 million for this piece of crap? What a waste. If it's true that sequels are planned, I hope the producers take a look at the reviews on this page and don't go [throwing] away more "hard-earned" money. But you guys in the US were lucky: The german-dubbed version was even more pathetic.
Rating: Summary: The worst piece of crap I have ever seen Review: I'm a long time D&D gamer... love the genre and am thankful the Lord of the Rings movies did it right. As for the Dungeons and Dragons movie... well, I think a brain dead monkey could write something better. I heard it was bad... I fully expected awful... but no, oh no... I was still not prepared for the load of crap this movie dished out. Special effects? Whatever. The effects were cheesy and you can tell all the money was poured into the final scene with the dragons circling the city. There's one random character that keeps flicking his tongue out - I imagine a computer generated serpentine tongue was supposed to be added, but the movie makers left it untouched, and now you have some goofy looking guy sticking out his tongue now and then. I'm laughing just thinking of how stupid it was. Anyway, don't expect plot, acting or continuity. Where did the Dwarf come from? I don't think it was even explained... and he surely has no reason to join our band of idiot adventurers. What's the point of having a spell caster who never casts spells? And why is a thief becoming a swashbuckling, sword-swinging fighter? <shudder> So awful. People who call D&D gamers dorks will have a lot of ammunition if they see this lousy piece of pig vomit.
Rating: Summary: Soul crushingly bad Review: When I went to see this in the theater I expected to see the worst movie I'd ever seen. I did. If you are considering renting this or whatever just for a laugh, don't bother. I am readily entertained by virtually all movies, but this one didn't work at all. There is no joy in this movie whatsoever. Well, the villain was pretty hilarious on occasion, but not frequently enough to make this anywhere near bearable. Beware.
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