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Mystery Science Theater 3000 - Red Zone Cuba

Mystery Science Theater 3000 - Red Zone Cuba

List Price: $19.95
Your Price: $17.96
Product Info Reviews

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Rating: 3 stars
Summary: Dead Zone Cuba
Review: I am a big fan of Mystery Science Theater 3000, but this is not one of their best episodes. John Carradine has been in more turkeys than stuffing at Thanksgiving, but at least he had enough sense to leave after the first few minutes of this film. Most of the MST3K jokes fall flat, simply because they have so little material to work with. The most comical sight is the actor who plays Fidel Castro. I've seen better fake beards in a grammar school play. I would highly recommend this movie as a cure for insomnia. Huey Lewis summed it up best when he said, "sometimes bad is bad!"

Rating: 5 stars
Summary: I'm Cherokee Jack!
Review: This steaming pile of celluloid proves that, no matter how small the budget or creativity, a force of six guys just can't conquer Cuba - not even when led by renaissance man Coleman Francis.
This has always been one of my favorite MST3K experiments, despite a couple of weak host segments and dreary, slow-moving plot. Just goes to show just how great the Brains were at writing those awesomely funny riffs under duress. And remember, "they don't call John Carradine 'the voice' for nothing!"

Rating: 5 stars
Summary: YES! THE "HAPPY, UPBEAT SONG!"
Review: A classic. Mike and the 'bots are subjected to the work of Coleman Francis, a director-writer-star who is like a cross between Broderick Crawford and Curly from the Three Stooges. This movie, an attempted exploitation of the Bay of Pigs, looks like he tried to shoot "The Longest Day" with a '60's home movie camera. The dismal results so bum the guys out that even Mike turning into Carol Channing doesn't help. Luckily after the film ends they all break into a chorus of "The Happy, Upbeat Song", a little ditty that really does contain the secret of life and happiness. One of their best.

Rating: 4 stars
Summary: Night Train To Mundo Fine...
Review: This is, quite possibly, the worst movie evr put on mst3k. Yes, even worse than "Manos." First off,the acting,as always, is too horrible to comprehend. Second, the plot is about as lucid as Courtney Love is chaste. First, we're in New Mexico, then we're suddenly in Florida for Army training, which lasts all of two minutes. Then they're fighting Castro himself (yeah,right), only to be captured and sent to what looks like the world's most easily escapable tool shed. They fly back home, and start killing people for no reason, and that takes up the last fifty percent of the movie.

Did they even need to go to Cuba?

Worst of all, the editing is terrible. Certain shots happen twice in a row, many crucial scenes are skipped over, and the films so riddled with jump-cuts you'll break your neck just watching it.

Needless to say, Mike & co. deliver some choice commentary. Unfortunately, it's not as funny as it could be, which is why it gets four stars. Still, for the avid mistie, it's a great way to kill some time. Enjoy.

Rating: 2 stars
Summary: Eh
Review: I really like Mike, but this is one of the driest MST3K's i've seen in a long time. I think the really bad thing about this episode is the fact that this movie is just plain aweful. Yes, there are even some things the MST3K boys can't work with.

Rating: 4 stars
Summary: I'M CHEROKEE JACK, YOU SHOVE OFF
Review: If you're familar with the name Coleman Francis - then you know what you're in for. If not, then be warned, Francis is to film what Jack the Ripper was to London Society. Hacked, cut and torn to peices, this is less a film but an orbiting selection of scenes built around one large man - Coleman Francis... and it hurts. But as luck would have it, the crew on the SOL make it hurt with laughter (awwwww). Packed with excellent jibs, jibes and jokes RED ZONE CUBA will not fail to make you laugh - this edition misses five stars simply because the cut scenes with the SOL crew are a little weak and will have you reaching for your fast faward (until it hits DVD - then you'll just cut to the next chapter), but never during the movie. If you can't wait until it hits DVD next year - or don't have a player yet - this edition on VHS is still a good time.

Rating: 5 stars
Summary: Watching this is more painful than having a root canal
Review: I can't get that "Night Train" song out of my head. It's extremely painful to listen. As a matter of fact, sitting through this movie is just as painful. What was John Carradine thinking when he read the script? OUCH!!!

Rating: 2 stars
Summary: Sheer Pain
Review: I love MST3K. The low rating is not a reflection on Mike and the bots. The fact is, this is the most painful MST film I have ever sat through. I could never describe how bad the plot(?) continuity is. It is so bad that Mike and the Bots have a hard time making it funny. It is also an episode from the early Mike era before he hit his stride. This does not help matters. This episode just hurts. Coleman Francis, ouch.

Rating: 4 stars
Summary: You'll laugh until it hurts!
Review: Red Zone Cuba was a father's day present for my dad, but it's a gift that the whole family loves. The short is a classic '40's film on public speaking tips. Trust me, you've got to take the 'knee test'.

The actual film is just out of this world. If this movie was by itself, I could never get through it. Luckily, the mst3k guys make it worth your while. The plot is full of loose ends, and it includes the absolute LONGEST prisoner sequence in the history of film.

And whatever happens to the guy in the well? Geez, they just throw the guy down there for absolutely no reason...

If you're a MST3K fan, definitely get this video!

Rating: 1 stars
Summary: Not Funny at all.
Review: I have watched many MSTK episodes and most of them were funny but this one I rank a one star because it is simply not a funny episode. But maybe to some people it is a funny episode but not me.

One more thing I almost have all the MST3K episodes from Amazon and that's like 15 tapes or so and I wonder why the old episodes of this show are not on tape yet, most of the Mike Nelson episodes were not as funny as the old ones. I am a very loyal fan of MSTK and I can tell you that the old episodes were the best.


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