Rating: 
Summary: Brief Moments of Pleasure Not Enough for Being Tortured
Review: There are spoilers in this post. It's practically impossible not to mention some key points and do a good review, so if you mind, for heaven's sake, scroll on by. (Also please take note: The following is merely my opinion, and is only meant as such.)This is probably one of the most derivative movies I've ever seen. I recognized, in it, bits of X-files, War of the Worlds, Night of the Living Dead, and Morons from Outer Space. Gibson, who for the first 2/3 of the movie has evidently been directed to behave in the "Kevin Coster No-Expression School of Acting" does a good job of portraying a zombie. His brother -- once the audience is even allowed to know who this guy is -- looks like he could be Gibson's son. In fact, I was mystified by the relationships among these two and the children for the longest time. When the female cop called Gibson "father" at the beginning, I even thought she was Gibson's daughter. After being emotionless, Gibson then, toward the end, shows a spark of animation -- as "spark" is related to "atom bomb explosion" -- then lapses back into zombie-land. These aliens were definitely not the sharpest knives in the universe, coming to Earth, which is predominantly made of water, to eat people, who are predominantly made of water, then choosing the SMALLEST humans, who would probably make a few snacks, but not a real meal. Evidently the aliens, while they were "probing" Earth for information had overlooked the fact that water does them irreparable harm. Also, if they can be done in with a baseball bat, what about missiles? Do missles just bounce off? How about a shotgun? And what was up with wood being a problem for them? Wood is DRY! Cornstalks have water in them -- not wood planks. One good thing about this problem with water -- Seattle was safe; so, most likely, were coastal cities and the cities around the Great Lakes. As a writer, I had a real problem with the viewpoints used in this movie. The audience, for example, is left hanging at one point, staring up a staircase for what seems an eternity while indistinct noises came from upstairs. This wasn't suspenseful -- it was boring. It's no wonder the characters slept for 12 hours. (12 hours? How could they sleep at ALL with aliens trying to break into the house? Did Gibson's character, perhaps, have a narcoleptic response to extreme stress?) There are several instances where the audience doesn't even know as much as the characters. This works fairly well in a mystery novel, but if an author wrote something like, "The father walked upstairs to investigate. There were noises. The stairs were empty. More noises disturbed the silence. The staircase was still empty." the novel would never get past the slushpile. Then, for no apparent reason -- at least not one that had anything to do with the plot -- we are treated to the alien's viewpoint as he merely stares, in the best tradition of heroines being menanced by a monster, while water descends, sending him to his doom. We, as the audience, are thinking, "Ah - THAT saved them some special effects money!" I'm not sure why the writer wanted us to know this invasion was similar to War of the Worlds. I'd already had that thought and knew that whatever killed off the aliens was going to be something very simple and stupid. And just what did those people in the "remote villages" who discovered how to defeat the aliens do that was so mysterious? Did they have primitive garden hoses? Why didn't the TV people just say, "WATER HURTS AND KILLS THE ALIENS!" You'd think this would be news to share, not keep to one's self. I was somewhat offended at the implication that the audience was so simplistic and willing to suspend their disbelief that they wouldn't notice all the movie's problems. I could go on and on about the inconsistencies, bad writing, bad directing and so-on, but you're probably already nodding off. Suffice to say, I won't be rushing off to see the next movie this fellow does.
Rating: 
Summary: 6 Sure Signs Your Husband Falls Asleep Watching This DVD
Review: 1. It's a Sci-fi film set in ... Pennsylvania (now that's scary)
2. The real-life name of the writer/director tops the characters'
3. Featured is a set of poor motherless children (trite)
4. The top performances are given by the supporting cast
5. Your husband can legitimately call the DVD "X-files does Little House on the Prairie"
6. The requisite aliens are men in bumpy green bodysuits reminiscent of the shriveled pickles you left in the back of the fridge since that picnic, last July. That being said, Signs is far from the worst Sci-fi movie I've ever seen and, if you liked it, this additional tidbit may come as consolation: I bought this DVD to share with my husband after seeing it in the theater - twice - without him. Signs is the tale of Graham Hess, a farmer-preacher (is there a call for a lot of those in eastern PA?) whose faith has fallen following the death of his wife. Hess (Mel Gibson) wakes one day to discover a crop circle stamped in his field. The pets are acting up and Hess's son Morgan (Rory Calkin) has to impale the family German Shepard with a barbeque squewer to save little sister Bo (Abby Breslin). Add one Officer Caroline Paski (Cherry Jones, whose contribution to the film is as believable as it gets), and one Merrill Hess (Joaquin Phoenix, whose contribution isn't) - Graham's younger brother who has moved-in to help out after his sister-in-law's death - and we've set the scene. Perhaps we should begin with the three elements that are truly on par in this film, since a spoonful of sugar helps the medicine ball go down. Before I was halfway through with my first viewing, I already had these elements pegged: cinematography, score, supporting cast. Now, if I were a reviewer worth my salt, I'd be telling you what recognition - if any - this film won in the awards circuit (in other words I'd be busy backing up my opinion with somebody else's). As it stands, I don't know. I don't base my movie watching on other people's reviews nor on the issuing of awards and nominations because I often don't agree. But if you want my word on the matter, read on. James Newton Howard's score is one of a trio of elements, which help buoy Signs, keeping it from sinking into the murky waters of B-flick also-rans. It is just the kind of music I like to hear: music that I don't - at first. Good soundtracks do not distract viewers from the story matter they were designed to compliment. For instance, you should not be sitting in the movie theatre thinking, "Gee, that's great music; think I'll go buy the CD." What well-crafted and carefully conducted scores should do is help establish mood and draw you into the action. They should echo your feelings as you watch the film or - for those less emotionally astute - serve to clue-in the viewer on the intended tone of the scene. Howard's work does all this and more. More than one sf&f movie has been ruined by a poor score (Willow comes to mind), so the success of this leg of the tripod shoring up Signs is a crucial one. The second excellent piece of work in the film is the cinematography...the filming itself. We're talking what's being framed in the shot, the lighting, the pacing and proper juxtaposition of close-up vs. longer view, the angles chosen, etc. Cinematography is not just the set - it's the wardrobe the set is sporting and the ability of the cinematographer to know well enough not to attire the set in grunge when the scene calls clearly for eveningwear. From the opening scene of the Hess's backyard as seen from a second-story bedroom window to the final shot in the film, I can find little fault with this element in Signs. Like the score, the visual interpretation of the story proves keen, compelling and apt. The third leg of the tripod of virtues that redeems this film from its lesser qualities is the work of the supporting cast. Cherry Jones is down-home familiar as Officer Caroline Paski and my view - for those of you who know my former profession -- is not a product of personal bias. In fact, if anything, passing off as believable a woman police officer is a difficult task; it's too frequently abysmally done. Jones makes the grade and winds up one of the three actors I would like to see in another movie. The other two are Merritt Wever as Tracey Abernathy, the teenage drugstore clerk, and - interestingly enough - Manoj Nelliyattu Shyamalan. Who you say? That's M. Night Shyamalan: writer, producer & director of Signs (told'ja he had a great name) - cast as Ray, the affable fellow who, having fallen asleep at the wheel one night, swerved off a dark road and into Hess's wife who was out on a stroll. So, with all these elements going for it, what, you ask, are the movie's lesser merits? Dismissable, if you don't mind stilted dialog, contrived plot lines and obvious give-aways (like Bo's obsession with water and its guaranteed link to story resolution). This is a movie that would have benefited by a cast of "unknowns," the renown of the leads doing little but getting in the way of the tale's veracity. It doesn't help that Gibson had never portrayed a father well (see - gag - The Patriot) nor that the other three are all riding the wake of their sibling's acting successes (in Hollywood, as in politics, I happen to hate familial dynasties). Nevertheless, a few decent scenes emerge, including one between Graham and Merrill, with the children asleep on their laps, as they discuss the issue of faith in whispered tones. If I were to compare this film against other speculative fiction I've watched, I'd place it behind the DVD release of the Planet of the Apes Original TV Series, but significantly ahead of the Tim Burton version of Planet of the Apes. In the final analysis, Signs falls miserably behind Galaxy Quest, most Star Trek movies -- even behind Harry Potter fare -- yet lightyears ahead of trash like Independence Day and Armageddon. Pick your poison.
Rating: 
Summary: Creepy, Intelligent, and NOT A "B" MOVIE!
Review: I have to agree with a fellow reviewer that the so-called professional reviewer is wrong in calling this a "B" movie. "Signs" plays more with your mind and, to an extent, your faith better than most of the schlock that is put out these days. This film is very intelligent and very, very creepy. It probes your mind both spiritually(with Gibson's character) and mentally(with the use of the alien invasion). One of the creepiest moments in this film is when the television report reveals a "surprise" at a birthday party(I don't want to give too much info and spoil it). This one of my favorite movies. So what if the aliens don't whip up on Harry Connick, Jr. and Will Smith? Who cares if there aren't any great explosions or uber-starships? This movie relies on you as the viewer using your mind to fill in the holes. It's almost like reading a book because your mind builds the story along with the movie. How dare M. Night make you use your brain! Watch this movie. It is sooooo much better than the majority of the reviewers claim.
Rating:
Summary: Horrible
Review: This is one of the worst movies I have ever seen. Everyone who watched this with me left the room before it was over. Just dreadful.
Rating: 
Summary: This would have had more stars had it . . .
Review: Okay, aliens are freaky. Especially these ones. And especially considering I live in the midwest, surrounded by corn fields. The first bit of this film was pretty freaky. Unfortunately, M. Night Shylaman decides to put in some other overtones, and basically the whole film IS, in the end, about a priest who loses his faith then regains it after he realizes that God really DOES have a plan, and yes, his wife dying was part of it. This movie just suggests that humans have no free will whatsoever and I feel that even Christians will be upset with the message of this film. It turns silly and corny and doesn't leave me feeling creeped out at all; just upset that I wasted seven bucks.
Rating: 
Summary: This is NOT a B movie!!!!
Review: I was surfing through Amazon and this came up in my recommendations. I saw the movie in theatres and was SHOCKED to see they started their review with "This B movie". M. Night Shyamalan is such an incredible presence in Hollywood right now that just the mention of his name will draw a "water cooler crowd" to the area panting to hear about his new release. (This actually happened a few weeks ago). This movie didn't let any of his fans down and probably created new legions of admirers. The scene where 2 children and a grown man have foil on their heads is just priceless and evokes memories of the great Twilight Zone episodes. We live in a CGI Mania society where no one wants to use their own imagination. Most savvy movie goers do not need thousands of CGI spaceships to understand the emotions of an Alien Invasion. Night has a great story and incredible performances by both of the children (Rory Culkin and Abigail Breslin). Joaquin Phoenix also outshines the overrated Mel Gibson. It is comical the Amazon reviewer finds fault with the movie and script and lauds Gibson's performance. Buy the DVD and give the movie your full attention. Forget it is "Mel Gibson". His character is tremendous and the heart of the story. His acting isn't. Put yourself in the minds of the characters and try to think of what YOU would do if there was a reality of an Alien Invasion. Try to figure out where you would go and what you would do. To call this movie "vaguely hollow" is the same as saying that all Bruce Willis did was watch a ring drop on the floor. (Sixth Sense). I look to PROFESSIONAL reviewers to ask MORE of a movie than lots of special effects. If you are looking for thousands of spaceships, millions of bullets and buckets of blood, this movie won't be to your liking. On the other hand, if you want a kick-ass story, great acting, and a chance to use your imagination for a 2 hour roller coaster ride, this is just the ticket for you!
Rating:
Summary: Signs
Review: I would give it five stars, except that this movie won't capture you at the end perhaps the way Sixth Sense might have. It gets four stars because this movie is brilliantly written. The key elements of storytelling are to show and not tell. For the first hour of the movie, you question whether the alleged alien invasion is real or not. It's not like some other movies where they throw the aliens out there and then show stuff blowing up. I definitely like how it's put together and makes you guess, based on the tidbits of clues placed at random throughout the story. It's not as strong as Sixth Sense, but it's worth watching.
Rating:
Summary: CRAPTASTIC
Review: This movie is horrible. Outright garbage! A film that is ridiculously simple - one man's loss and recovery of faith in God - somehow woven into a ridiculous plot with Aliens from planet wherever. Are you freaking kidding me? I want my money back. Top 10 worst movies I have ever seen. It should come with a warning that says ' You will be dumber after seeing this movie'.
Rating:
Summary: I dont get why people bad mouth this great movie
Review: I haven't seen such a great alien movie since john carpenters, "they live". That movies great and mars attacks. The thing that's fascinating about this movie that it is real, meaning its not like other alien movies where you fight aliens in space you know *cough* (independence day crapy )this movie like this could actually happened to somebody. Its realism makes it very scary. Im pretty sure you must have jumped one or said "ho $hi*. M. Night Shyamalan is an amazing director. The sixth sense, unbreakable all those were great but I think signs is the best, because I am into aliens and stuff. I could see why M. Night Shyamalan didn't want to do a commentary because what would he want to say. "you see in this scene the alien pops out, don't go there, the aliens in there don't, don't,(screaming) I told you not to go in there". But either way this movie is still cool and so is this DVD. You need to buy!!!
Rating:
Summary: It's Happening. Aliens are here.
Review: This is a highly freaky movie with nothing concerning sex, not much cussing, nothing inappropriate, funny, thrilling, very well structured, and a great story. My favorite character is Morgan, my favorite scean is where the family is hiding in the basement. NOTE: I only saw the VHS version, but the DVD probably isn't to much different. In the movie, a family with a lost mother/wife. The family, Graham, Merril, Morgan, and Bo Hess, wake up one morning to find a gigantic crop-circle in their field. Graham thinks it's only a hoax made by Lionel Prichardson and the Wolfington Brothers. While watching the news on TV, they discover crop-circles are being made all over the entire world. Soon, extraterrestrials are found all over the earth. Aliens try to invade the Hess' home one night after Graham accidentally cuts an extraterrestrial's fingers. After trying to bord the house up (forgetting the attic door), they hide for a while in their family room. The extraterrestrials discover how to get in and you get to see an alien's hand. The family runs off into the basement and hide from the extraterrestrials. Even though one of them almost captures Morgan, they live out the night and find out the extraterrestrials are leaving without the ones the humans have wounded. Feeling it safe to open the basement door a return to normal life, they go upstairs while Morgan's breathing problems (triggered by fear and were set off the night before), begin. While Merril gets medicine, the extraterrestrial catches Morgan. Because of Bo's drinking water problem, Merril beats the alien and Morgan is healed. Graham becomes a reverend again and they live their lives. All-and-all, it's great story, and theirs more to it. Get the movie and watch it.
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