Asylum of Satan/Satan's Children

Rating:
Summary: Satan's Children-Funniest Movie Ever!!!!
Review: Asylum of Satan is all well and good, but Satan's Children could possibly be the single funniest movie of all time. Meant to be serious it contains so many lines that make you laugh so historical that it is possible your heart could explode!!! Bobby's father only has one line throughout the entire movie that isn't side splitting. Only to follow it up with another classic remark. The whole concept of this atrocity is so funny you'll want to watch it over and over. When watching this mess-terpiece keep an eye out for the following:

1. The amount of times the Douglas family exclaims ALL RIGHT!!!
2. The amount of time Bobby Douglas is walking on the street before going into a gay bar.
3. The speed in which Jake and Bobby travel on his MoPed. They are going so slow, Jake can barley keep it steady.
4. How long Janice's leg is under the table, and the look of accomplishment on Bobby's face.
5. The background when the one girl is getting asked if she is gay or not.
6. The soup Bobby is get fed while he is hurt (It's water)
7. The gunfire screams at the end.
8. The 45-minute love song, while Janice is hanging.

You see all these great scenes and more in Satan's Children!!!

Oh yeah don't miss Chris Duncan's mustache or the zipper on the Satan outfit in the remarkable Asylum or Satan!!!


Rating:
Summary: Great Satanic package
Review: If every DVD would be this jam-packed, I'd be in heaven. This double feature DVD has almost 3 hours of stuff. The movies are okay but they're not the best thing on the DVD. I preferred Satan's Children over Asylum of Satan. The actress from Asylum was beautiful, though. The quality of both films are borderline acceptable. They both have a lot of scratches and grain but considering these movies had extremely limited releases, it's a miracle they've made it to DVD. No, the best thing on this amazing DVD package is the short called "Satan's Dance" with Burlesque Queen Lorraine Lane. The whole thing is COOL! I love it and it alone is worth the price of the DVD. Also the trailers are great. My favorite trailer is Dr. Tarr's Torture Dungeon. Wow! I can't wait to see that film.

One of the best Something Weird DVDs yet.

Rating:
Summary: I love this movie
Review: My favorite thing about Asylum Of Satan is counting how many times Lucinda says Dr. Spector's name. If you see this movie you should understand what I mean.This movie is a favorite of mine.

Rating:
Summary: Asylum of Satan: Magnificent Use Of Rubber
Review: Never before or since has rubber been depicted onscreen with the precise vision seen in Asylum of Satan. Satan's Children works as a dramatic character study, but if thrills are what you are looking for, or if rubber is what you're looking for, than Asylum of Satan is the movie for you. Rubber snakes and rubber spiders work for a rubber devil and try to kill virgins while men run around with mad moustaches and bell bottoms. The pace never lets up and neither does the latex.

I also thought Carla Borelli was one hot babe, only surpassed by the exotic Martine.

Collectively, the DVD is a classic amalgamation of all things elastic and fantastic. You won't be disappointed.

Rating:
Summary: Satan's Children IS THE BEST MOVIE EVER!!
Review: SATAN'S CHILDREN, for some reason is the second feature on this, but should be the first. It is far more watchable, exploitative and fun. SATAN'S CHILDREN is a movie that would never EVER EVER be made today. It is far too dark. It presents a truly satanic idea of there being no right or wrong. This guy gets ravaged by some very twisted men and his body is found by satanists who take him in. Thinking he is a homosexual they decide he can't be a satanist and so to prove them wrong, the guy hunts down his rapists and beheads them and proves to the cult that yes, he would make a good satanist. I have never seen the like. The guy also runs around in the swamp in his underwear for a good fifteen minutes making this the only 70's drive-in fare I've ever seen where a guy is running around barely clothed and being pursued by machete wielding psychoss. I love this move. LOVE IT!!
ASYLUM OF SATAN is also fun, but SATAN'S CHILDREN is a an unusual masterpiece that any fan of exploitation would love. Especially if your a guy into guys. Some would say it's homophobic but I thought it was just hot, hot, hot! But then again, I'm not a circuit boy.

Rating:
Summary: For devoted trash fans only!
Review: Shot in 1972 ASYLUM OF SATAN was director William GIRDLER's debut movie. He would later helm the animal horror flick GRIZZLY, which made quite an impression on me, when I watched it on TV as a young boy.
ASYLUM OF SATAN's plot concerns Lucinda MARTIN, a young woman who is hospitalized after a nervous breakdown and trasferred to a weird private clinic. Her mental and physical health however is at risk there since the rundown medical facility is in fact run by devil worshippers. While the few other patients are killed one by one, Lucinda's fiance despairingly tries to save her, as Lucinda awaits her fate as human sacrifice in a black mass. I don't want to give away the ending, but you can expect a not so unusual twist ending.
ASYLUM OF SATAN clearly shows its shoe-string budget, but is entertaining in a trashy way with its cheap thrills and ridiculous make-up effects. The Devil himself appears toward the end of the film - likely you fall out of your chair laughing when you see this basement make-up "effort". However some scenes manage to be effective, my favorite being the scene with the blind female patient being killed in an indoor swimming pool by snakes.
The second film of this devilish double feature is much better. SATAN'S CHILDREN is a very grim and bad taste movie from the glorious 1970ies, when nobody cared about political correctness.
The plot revolves around runaway teenager Bobby, who flees his sexually teasing stepsister and his tyrant father, only to bump into a vicious homosexual. He holds Bobby at knife-point and phones his equally depraved gay friends for a "hell ass party"(!) They throw Bobby out of their car after they had gang raped him. Bobby is found hurt and naked by some satanists, who resemble more a bunch of hippies than a group of devil worshippers. To put it briefly, problems for Bobby ensue, as the female second in command develops a crush for him, much to the annoyance of other satanists and to the group's leader. Bobby's love interest finds herself buried up to her neck and tortured with ants (!), while Bobby is kicked out of the group, because "Satan hates queers". Will he gain the respect of the satanists?
Without wanting to give too much away I assure you that the end is very mean spirited and cruel - just the way I like it. It involves quicksand, shotgun mayhem, dismemberment and a human sacrifice. Very satisfying ending indeed. I highly recommend SATAN'S CHILDREN, however the squeamish should not apply.
The extras on this DVD are a mixed bag. I urge you to skip the short feature THE SOUL SNATCHER. Despite the brief running time it seems to last forever, is pointless and boring beyond belief. The trailers however are great. Aside from the quite effective trailer for ASYLUM OF SATAN I particularly enjoyed the trashy but fun HORROR HIGH trailer and the trailer for DR. TARR'S TORTURE DUNGEON, which is weird and has a certain arthouse feel to it. My favorite however is the trailer for MANSION OF THE DOOMED, where people are held captive and get their eyes removed. Watch if you dare!
Another cool extra feature is the large gallery of horror comic artwork. I also enjoyed Patty BREEN's extensive liner notes regarding William GIRDLER's ASYLUM OF SATAN. Full of interesting details, it provides entertaining insight into B-movie making.
Conclusion: An essential purchase for fans of trashy horror flicks, all others approach with extreme caution.

Rating:
Summary: DOUBLE YOUR SATANIC PLEASURE
Review: This is the best disc Something Weird has put out so far. The first movie is Asylum Of Satan by director William Girdler. This is the tale of a mysterious hospital run by a sinister man who keeps a beautiful woman there against her will. Of course she is going to be given to Satan during a black mass. Leading Lady Carla Borelli is very pleasant on the eyes and does a very good job as the damsel in distress. Charles Kissinger as the menacing Dr. Spector is top notch. Good shocks in this movie.

The second feature is very twisted, but a lot of fun. It's Satan's Children and it's about a young man who is raped by four gay men and dumped on the side of the road and left for dead. A gropu od satanists find him and the female leader falls in love with him. She takes over the coven while the leader is away and proceeds to torture a lesbian member of the sect simply because she is a lesbian. Bobby, the young man who was raped is told he cannot be a satanist because he was raped and it proves he's weak!! He then hunts down his attackers and.....well I won't spoil it. Just ger this disc and see for yourself. You won't be disappointed. Lots of cool extras as well.