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Contamination

Contamination

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Rating: 3 stars
Summary: Very cheap, bloody but cheerful rip-off of "Aliens"
Review: In the U.K, this is still banned after over 20 years!!! The plot, although uninspired, constantly reconnects the viewer by short but gruesome scenes including exploding alien pods that melt people!!!

Rating: 4 stars
Summary: Avocado of Death
Review: No, this is not about Pinkwater's Snarkout boys. Instead it is about a movie called Alien Contamination (A.K.A. Toxic Spawn) a strange but entertaining foreign film set in America with shades of Atomic Submarine and The Arrival.

A runaway freighter is boarded and found to contain a gruesomely dead crew and boxes marked coffee that contain large avocado-like pods or eggs. These eggs explode on maturity and any mammalian life nearby will explode seconds later. Research shows the eggs to be non-terrestrial in nature. A chance landing by alien spores is ruled out and the failed Mars mission is suspected.

The surviving astronaut from the Mars mission is now a drunk. He had claimed to have seen avocado-like eggs on Mars but the rest of the crew denied his claims. With his help the coffee shipment is tracked to a plantation in South America and the action moves there.

It turns out that the Mars crew mate is not dead. He is alive and running the operation to destroy all human life. He is under the control of a being known as the Cyclops. He brought a Cyclops spore back from Mars where he was hypnotized. After some fun scenes the heroes triumph in the end and the menace from Mars is ended.

Despite the feeling of wrongness that foreign films in English often have, this is actually well above the usual monster shlock movie. In a way it reminds me of The X-Files with investigators that actually investigate records instead of just stumbling along. It was much more of a detective film with aliens than an alien movie with detectives.

I recommend this film for anyone who likes better horror and science fiction films.

Rating: 4 stars
Summary: Avocado of Death
Review: No, this is not about Pinkwater's Snarkout boys. Instead it is about a movie called Alien Contamination (A.K.A. Toxic Spawn) a strange but entertaining foreign film set in America with shades of Atomic Submarine and The Arrival.

A runaway freighter is boarded and found to contain a gruesomely dead crew and boxes marked coffee that contain large avocado-like pods or eggs. These eggs explode on maturity and any mammalian life nearby will explode seconds later. Research shows the eggs to be non-terrestrial in nature. A chance landing by alien spores is ruled out and the failed Mars mission is suspected.

The surviving astronaut from the Mars mission is now a drunk. He had claimed to have seen avocado-like eggs on Mars but the rest of the crew denied his claims. With his help the coffee shipment is tracked to a plantation in South America and the action moves there.

It turns out that the Mars crew mate is not dead. He is alive and running the operation to destroy all human life. He is under the control of a being known as the Cyclops. He brought a Cyclops spore back from Mars where he was hypnotized. After some fun scenes the heroes triumph in the end and the menace from Mars is ended.

Despite the feeling of wrongness that foreign films in English often have, this is actually well above the usual monster shlock movie. In a way it reminds me of The X-Files with investigators that actually investigate records instead of just stumbling along. It was much more of a detective film with aliens than an alien movie with detectives.

I recommend this film for anyone who likes better horror and science fiction films.

Rating: 3 stars
Summary: X Files anyone?
Review: The official print still cut after all these years. This is an enjoyable non-classic of its genre, and I'm not the only one who feels Chris Carter, the creator of X-Files has definately seen it.

Rating: 3 stars
Summary: So bad, it's funny
Review: This is really a terrible movie. Really. The dub is off sync, the plot makes no sense, and the score is, well... incredibly bad. The cuts in between scenes are dizzying, as is the cinematography (at a few points, we were blinded by the bright lights in the movie). Finally, the Martian eggs are the best actors in the film, understanding dramatic tension and irony better than any of the characters. (Plus, they light up, hum, and... explode...)

All that said, I loved this movie. It was HILARIOUS. It just can't be taken too seriously, that's all. I thoroughly enjoyed the witty dialogue ("Whatever happened to the crew, it was SUDDEN.") and the scenes involving Martians. The "Cyclops" is beautifully constructed, complete with a blinking eye bulb. The "Martian cave" is full of the lovely eggs (or exploding, humming avacados) and is so bright and white, all thought processes will cease until the end of the movie. The exploding gore effects are great too... I'd go into more detail, but that'd ruin the fun.

And I must thank "The Goblin" for his excellent work in composing the score. Well done. It will take me a few weeks to recover...

Rating: 4 stars
Summary: That's Not Coffee!
Review: This is the only film I've seen of Luigi Cozzi's, and it's not too shabby. Silly and moronic to be sure, but we're talking about Italian gross out flicks here. The Italians loved to try and cash in on whatever was big in America at the time. Italian directors did westerns in the 70s, along with adult films, zombie films(because of Romero's success), crime and sword and sorcery films in the early 80s. Considering these films are so low budget, they have to try and give you something you can't find in Hollywood pictures, and that "something" as you may already know is GORE. Amidst the slew of zombie/cannibal flicks that came flying out of Italy comes Contamination-an imitator of the hit, Alien. Cozzi isn't really into horror films, so decided to delve into his favorite genre, sci-fi. Contamination is your basic Italian horror formula only with a sci-fi theme this time around. We get an abandoned boat sailing into New York harbor(sound familiar?) carrying some eggs that spit out acid and make peoples' chests explode(don't ask). This takes our cast of characters on that journey down south(sound familiar?) to solve the mystery. Starring Ian McCulloch-a good actor who always gets suckered into doing these kinds of films-as our butt kicking hero, this film will make you puke in your pants and do a funky little dance as you watch exploding chests(and mice) and a man eating alien cyclops! This was particulary scary for me coz I was attacked by a cyclops once in the Bahamas. Certainly not the best import from Italy, but I've seen alot worse(see Bruno Mattei).

Rating: 4 stars
Summary: That's Not Coffee!
Review: This is the only film I've seen of Luigi Cozzi's, and it's not too shabby. Silly and moronic to be sure, but we're talking about Italian gross out flicks here. The Italians loved to try and cash in on whatever was big in America at the time. Italian directors did westerns in the 70s, along with adult films, zombie films(because of Romero's success), crime and sword and sorcery films in the early 80s. Considering these films are so low budget, they have to try and give you something you can't find in Hollywood pictures, and that "something" as you may already know is GORE. Amidst the slew of zombie/cannibal flicks that came flying out of Italy comes Contamination-an imitator of the hit, Alien. Cozzi isn't really into horror films, so decided to delve into his favorite genre, sci-fi. Contamination is your basic Italian horror formula only with a sci-fi theme this time around. We get an abandoned boat sailing into New York harbor(sound familiar?) carrying some eggs that spit out acid and make peoples' chests explode(don't ask). This takes our cast of characters on that journey down south(sound familiar?) to solve the mystery. Starring Ian McCulloch-a good actor who always gets suckered into doing these kinds of films-as our butt kicking hero, this film will make you puke in your pants and do a funky little dance as you watch exploding chests(and mice) and a man eating alien cyclops! Certainly not the best import from Italy, but I've seen alot worse(see Bruno Mattei).

Rating: 4 stars
Summary: Great Latenight Viewing!
Review: What do expect from an Alien rip-off?
This movie is just plain fun, don't expect to much just sit back and laugh.
Enjoy.


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