Beware! Children At Play

Rating:
Summary: A terrible tastelest movie...
Review: ...and thats what made it great! This was the film to first introduce me to Troma. There's lots of blood and gorre and bad acting...a true classic for the Troma lover.

Rating:
Summary: Why does Troma hate me so much?
Review: Horrible...boring...horrible...disgusting... horrible... Troma has made more bad films then I care to remember but this one takes the cake. Shoe-string budget, terrible actors, the worst special effects this side of Plan 9... Simply put, the worst film I've ever seen (yes, even worse then Gore-Met, the Zombie Chef From Hell).

Rating:
Summary: Stupid
Review: I'd heard of "Troma" films for awhile now, so I thought I'd give it a go and actually see one of them. I want a refund. I got this for five dollars at a blowout sale.

It opens with this kid and his father in the woods roasting marshmallows and chanting spells, campfire stories. The father gets his foot caught in a deertrap. He dies. The kid goes psycho.

From there we see a perfect example of how not to make a movie.
The gore is hoky and retarded. At no point was this shocking or scary. Laughable. And not even that laughable. Just bad.

You won't be "tromatized", you'll just be bored, and if you have a weak heart maybe cheaply disgusted. I want my five back.

Rating:
Summary: Low budget + bad acting= one great troma movie.
Review: Llyod Kaufman stated in his book that this was one of his most extreme movies. Not hardly, I say. The ideas in this movie are interesting, but not extreme. The last five minutes could've saved the movie if the rest wasn't so slow. Sure, some kids get shot, beaten up, and the town goes on a kiddie killing spree, but throughout an hour and a half this happens: father gets stuck in bear trap, dies, sends kid off for help, then slowly towns people get killed--some gore scenes better than others, then sheriff and science fiction writer (main characters) find out what is really going on with the children and the town rebels.
For ten bucks, this was a good buy, but for the easily dissapointed don't purchase. True troma fans, make sure you're willing to be either impressed or dissapointed. There is no middle ground for these kinds of movies. This would make a wonderful rentail if you could find it. Blockbuster need not apply.

Rating:
Summary: Not bad, but not the best
Review: Llyod Kaufman stated in his book that this was one of his most extreme movies. Not hardly, I say. The ideas in this movie are interesting, but not extreme. The last five minutes could've saved the movie if the rest wasn't so slow. Sure, some kids get shot, beaten up, and the town goes on a kiddie killing spree, but throughout an hour and a half this happens: father gets stuck in bear trap, dies, sends kid off for help, then slowly towns people get killed--some gore scenes better than others, then sheriff and science fiction writer (main characters) find out what is really going on with the children and the town rebels.
For ten bucks, this was a good buy, but for the easily dissapointed don't purchase. True troma fans, make sure you're willing to be either impressed or dissapointed. There is no middle ground for these kinds of movies. This would make a wonderful rentail if you could find it. Blockbuster need not apply.

Rating:
Summary: Beware! This movie Rules!
Review: PLOT: When a boy's father dies at the hands of a bear trap on a camping trip, he vows vengence and says weird things and then eats his dad. (Yep it's true). Now 10 years later the children of Tromaville are disappearing. The townspeople are God-fearing and mad about the kids. They think they are getting killed, but it's quite the opposite. The children are being gathered up into a gang of parent killing maniacs by the boy whos dad died 10 years earlier. DO NOT miss the end of this movie. As it is the greatest ending...EVER!
STRAIGHT TALK: I love this movie. It was the first Troma film I saw that I was aware of. (I saw Killer Nerd many years earlier) This movie was so wierd, but I soon learned that thats what Troma is all about. The acting is terrible but who cares?! The effects are terrible but who cares?! This just a great movie sit back and laught at. I bought it for 3 bucks at Family Video and it was so worth it.
CAST: A few dudes and a bunch of crazy kids. Acting is not important here!
KILLS: A scythe cutting a man in half. A woman who somehow runs into a bunch of sharp wooden logs. And off course the massacre at the end.
CONCLUSION: A five star pick all the way. I thought the cover was cool so I rented it. Best decision ever! Don't pass this one by at you local Family Video.

Rating:
Summary: CHEESE HORROR AT ITS BEST!
Review: That's what I love about Troma movies, in fact, this was the first Troma movie I've ever seen. Yes, you WIMPS might find "Beware! Children at Play" boring, disgusting, and offensive but you people must learn to not take most movies seriously. With one of the BEST finales in cheesy horror history, I'm boosting the rating up a half a star and am hoping that a sequel will be made IMMEDIATELY! . ROCK ON! I LOVE THIS MOVIE!

Rating:
Summary: Absolutely Awful
Review: This is absolutely the worst movie that I have ever seen. The acting is horrible, special effects are extremely lacking, and the ending which is probably supposed to be gruesome actually was quite hilarious. This movie makes one wonder whether or not Troma had the kids pay for the budget out of their allowances.

Rating:
Summary: Absolutely Awful
Review: This is absolutely the worst movie that I have ever seen. The acting is horrible, special effects are extremely lacking, and the ending which is probably supposed to be gruesome actually was quite hilarious. This movie makes one wonder whether or not Troma had the kids pay for the budget out of their allowances.

Rating:
Summary: Troma doesn't hate you, Troma loves you...well, they love me
Review: This is an insane movie. There is no doubt about this. My sicko friends love this, especially the ending. It has to do with a guy who grew up in the woods luring kids into a cannibalistic cult, where they sacrifice adults. It's stupid as all hell, but it's so much fun to watch. The ending is a laugh riot (though it probably shouldn't be) where all the adults band together and slaughter their own kids. It's gory, it's cheap, and it comes with a free spatula! Ok, it doesn't come with a free spatula (good marketing idea though), but I'm willing to forgive Troma because they've been so good to me all these years. To quote the movie, "Will you touch me now, Uncle, the way Grendel touched Mother?" Have fun kids!