Vampires

Rating:
Summary: BLARGH. BLAAARRRGH!!!!
Review: What a terrible, terrible, awful, horrible movie.

I saw this years ago in theater, hated it, and then saw it at the video store and thought "Maybe I was wrong." So I rented it. And boy, was I right! This movie is a piece of garbage!

I have never hated a cast of characters more than Jack Crow and his slew of morons. How can you root for a guy who tortures and beats up priests? Who constantly swears and abuses women? This is the HERO of the film? Riiiight. And his unending references to "mahogany"... is this supposed to be funny? Because it's really not, it's annoying and stupid and makes the character even more unlikable, if possible. Perhaps this was the point: an "over the top", "balls out" hero and movie. Yeah, if that's what was attempted here, it doesn't come across at all. There is no irony or tongue-in-cheek with this character. Just a stupid little man who constantly appears to be trying to compensate for something. "I'm such a bad dude! Look! Look!" The guy is a loathsome toad.

There are many more movies with cooler visuals, more gore, a creepier feel, and better plot in this genre. This movie is so bad it isn't even laughable. It's embarassing.

This movie didn't give me a little "wood". A little "mahogany". It is a waste of film and intelligent movie viewers will avoid it like the plague.


Rating:
Summary: remember rule 5
Review: hey father let me ask you a question is just the start of one unforgettable exchange of james wood and the padre in the movie this movie was not only good and funny but had some truth to the legand of vampires vallack i have seen this movie several times and i just laugh everytime i see it but it's woods or vallack that make tis movie good but the the supporting cast such as the time cast dies or the first padre or even the cop but don't take my word for it check out the movie for your self

Rating:
Summary: Vampire Bites the Dust
Review: This wasn't as bad as expected in the begining and I gave it a chance but somewhere around half way, the film becomes another routine teen action flick with nothing to say. Woods isnt awful as the aging vampire hunter who cuts the fingers of priests to extract information but the vampire is so lame that we don't even think its frightening anymore. Most of the vampires look like rejects from a 1980's gothic bar and they are about as scary as a dead mosquito. The early 80's vampire flicks (Fright Night, Vamp, Dracula) are much better and I'd recommend seeing those instead of this waste.



Rating:
Summary: Git along little vampire...
Review: I think this is the Western of the mainstream vampire genre. Plenty of small empty towns, dusty roads, and empty landscapes. It has a drawling pace and plenty of stand-offs. Not overly exciting, but a fun watch and a decent origin story. Its strange how a movie about vampires and with lots of decapitated heads doesn't strike me as dark at all.
Thomas Ian Griffith does a great job as the Master Vampire Valek, although I wish he'd had more screen time. James Woods has no range so I usually don't like him, but he fit in this story nicely- if a bit shallowly- as Jack Crow, the leader of the slayers. Daniel Baldwin, as a slayer, was a typical Baldwin- they all look the same, act the same, etc. (Although I did like Alec in the Hunt for Red October.) Surprisingly, I thought Sheryl Lee- the quintessential blond/hooker/victim/naked chick- did a very good job as the seething psychic link to Valek.
The script is a little weak, and its not an all-star cast, but its a fun watch for vampire flick fans and non-fans alike.

Rated R for (...), language, and gore. (3 1/2 Stars)

Rating:
Summary: Decent Vampire Flick, but Lacks Some Bite
Review: Jack Crow (James Woods) and his band of renegade wannabe Van Helsings are modern-day vampire hunters. Together they find and kill the world?s bloodsuckers, and are supported by the church in doing so. One day, seemingly like any other, they set out to rid the world of yet another ?nest.? Just like true heroes they kill all vampires present. However, they note that it is quite odd that there seemed to be no master present in this particular group of fiends. Brushing that thought aside, the group heads to a local motel to party in celebration of the day?s victory.

Their party is cut short when the master makes his presence known by killing all present at the party with the exception of Jack Crow and his partner Montoya (Daniel Baldwin), as well as one random prostitute. This master vampire bites the prostitute and then leaves her with the two remaining vampire hunters. Since she, as she gradually turns into a creature of the night, will have a telepathic link to the one who bit her, Crow keeps her around to lead him to this nasty nighttime fiend. When the church is questioned regarding this particular vampire, Crow discovers that there is more to this vamp than meets the eye. With a newly acquired church representative in tow, Crow and Montoya set out to kill the bloodsucker.

Though this is not the best of Carpenter?s work, he can really do no wrong in my book. His score, though highly cliched, is memorable. The script can be ?dangerously cheesy? at times, but that is, in fact, part of the point. The religious undertones are intriguing as well. The characters are all well cast, and the acting is great considering the less-than-stellar script and plot they had to go with. It?s interesting to see the slightly different take vampire lore. However, the plot centers around the hunters, particularly Jack Crow, thus placing the vampires themselves in the background and effectively giving them very little depth (ok, non-existent depth with the exception of Valek, the head vampire).

Nonetheless, this film is extremely worthy of a rental and should not be over-looked by fans of the vampire genre. The opening scene immediately sucks you in and leaves you wanting to trail along for the ride. I would recommend buying this only if you are a die-hard Carpenter fan like myself, as there are indeed better movies of his out there (try Prince of Darkness for one) and better vampire genre films as well.

Rating:
Summary: A Refreshingly Different Vampire Movie!!
Review: John Carpenter takes Vampires to a whole new level in this excellent movie! If you want to see a traditional vampire movie, this is not for you! If you want action and lots of it then this is the best vampire movie for you! Jack Crow (James Woods) and his vampire slayers are ready for action, and the first 20 minutes of this movie shows them at work killing the vampires in their own hideout, even though the head vampire should be there he is nowhere to be found. They don't have to wait long because the head vampire Valek (Thomas Ian Griffith) finds them and kills most of Crow's vampire slayers, So Crow and Montoya (Daniel Baldwin) with the help of Katrina (Sheryl Lee) a hooker who was at the party which Valek interupted go in search of him and with the help of the Church they hope to finally be rid of Valek.

Rating:
Summary: Greatest vampire movie ever done
Review: I love this movie because of the guns,musics,story,place,James Woods and Daniel Baldwin.Guns:there are lots of good guns in this movie bowgun,spear,rifles.Musics:John Carpenters great west acoustic guýtarre style.story:vampires are in every where on this world and there are hunters to kick them down.place:movie takes places in very good states Texas,New Mexico James Woods and Daniel baldwin:they are very charismatic actors. I watched this movie about 22 times this is the one of the greatest movies that cant forgot in my whole life.

Rating:
Summary: Movie Blows
Review: This movie is one of the worst vampire movies I've ever seen. It's horrible and worse than cheesy. It's another film that portrays the evil vampire and the master that needs to be killed because he's so old and powerful that blah blah freakin blah. The way they drag the vampires out into the sun and how they burst into flames is really dumb with horrible effects.

Rating:
Summary: Watch Fright Night (1985) instead!
Review: A group of nine men (James Woods, Daniel Baldwin, Mark Boone Junior, Cary Hiroyukitagawa, Tommy Rosales, Henry Kingi, David Rowden, Clarke Coleman, Gregory Sierra) are vampire hunters. Starts like any other film. Abandeon-looking house. Vampires inside. Shooting spree. Drag them outside and burn them. Gregory Sierra (Barney Miller tv series) plays a priest who offers a blessing before the hunt and after they burn the vampires. They think all the vampires in New Mexico are accounted for except for the Master (Thomas Ian Griffith). The Master finds them, kills everyone except for James Woods, Daniel Baldwin and a freshly-bitten Sheryl Lee who are now on the run. Maximillian Schell plays a Cardinal. Filmed in Santa Fe, New Mexico.